28/02/2017
Today I'm reading this post through rose coloured glasses, it's been a great day (where for one of a thousand reasons it's been smooth sailing). I'm feeling strong, focused and ready to tackle all that comes my way. So I've not read this post with the same perspective I would have a few days ago, exhausted, frustrated and emotional. But for so many many reasons even the clear minded (not 'hormonal' or exhausted) me needs to shout from the roof top the following!
I am a midwife, I've been lucky to see so much beauty, strength, courage, focus and determination from the women I have worked with. It is the most humbling and at times vulnerable experience of their lives. We are tested in many different ways, some physical and many emotional. As they grow and nurture their unique little creation/s there is a constant trickle of white noise that leaves its mark on their inner voice..... the well intentioned stranger with a passing comment about the too big or too small belly, the care provider that assigns them medical labels and plants seeds of doubt about their abilities, her friends that only share half their story often because they don't know the full detail of their birth themselves. So in the weeks, months and days leading up to a woman's birth are we actually doing our best to encourage and support her to be strong? Informing and educating her so she can be empowered (and choose her level of conscious involvement). I know we should be doing better.........
Sadly the photographer in this text conversation has the right to her opinion and she (just like all of us) she has her story, perhaps that includes a birth and maybe not. But what I do know is this..... a woman's birth story matters! It matters to her..... it's not a pass or fail, vaginal birth or Caesar, in the bush or in a hospital. It's hers! It's the ways she BIRTHED HER BABY. Women need to stop hearing that a healthy baby is the only thing that matters (it goes without saying) they need to know that we respect and care for them, physically and emotionally, as a woman and also as a mum.
So when I hear cruel things said like in this text message above. I am reminded of just how important it is to make a woman feel strong, supported and cared for so that when she is showing the courage and focus needed during her baby/s birth that she knows it's not the mode of birth that matters it's that she was INCREDIBLE and she just BIRTHED her unique little human with a story that is a one of a kind.