13/03/2026
There was a long time where I questioned everything about myself.
My intuition.
The things I could feel.
The way I seemed to just “know” things without understanding why?
For most of my life I was told I was too sensitive, too emotional, imagining things, overreacting, dramatic or too much…
So like a lot of people do, I learned to push those parts of myself down.
I tried to be what I thought the world expected of me.
Even in the spiritual space for a while, I got caught in performative spirituality… saying the right things, trying to fit into what I thought this work was “supposed to look like”.
But grief has a way of stripping everything back to the truth!
Losing Jude broke me open in ways I can’t fully explain.
And somewhere inside that devastation, I realised something really important.
The connection I had always felt as a little girl never actually left me. I had just been too afraid of rejection to fully accept it as an adult.
Learning to regulate my nervous system and come back into my body changed everything.
Because the more grounded I became, the stronger that connection became too.
Not in a dramatic or mystical way.
Just a quiet, steady inner knowing.
Today I hold space as a Soul-Medium (My own terminology)
Not because I think I have the answers or because I want anyone to see me as some kind of “guru”. (Ick..)
But because I know how lonely grief can feel.
I know what it’s like to question whether the people you love are still close.
And I know how powerful it is when you realise that love doesn’t just disappear…
If there’s one thing my life has taught me, it’s this:
Your intuition isn’t something outside of you to go and “find”.
It truly is something you were born with!
And sometimes the path through grief is also the path that finally brings you back to yourself.
If you’ve ever felt those quiet nudges too…
you’re not imagining them.
This year I’m not interested in “perfect” spirituality.
I want to connect with real people!!
The ones who have always had that quiet inner knowing but maybe didn’t feel safe to talk about it.
The ones who are ready to find their community and share their stories too. 🫶✨
💕 Shan xx