Mazing Minds

30/11/2024

What if your kid IS the bully?

There’s much said and written about children being bullied, mostly at school, but what if your child IS the bully?

No-one wants to think this is true. Whenever we see our children upset or unhappy our momma bear protection is activated and we go in search of the threat. We’re looking for the source of our child’s distress so we can do something to help them.

It rarely occurs to us that our child could be the instigator of antisocial behaviour despite the fact that we live with them. We know all too well how they behave at times with their siblings or when they’re tired, when they don’t get their own way or want what someone else has . . .

Bullies are hurting too. By not considering the part our children can play in these difficult situations we are missing an opportunity to really understand them, to be truly present with them and their needs. Kids who bully others at school are not happy or content, they don’t feel seen, heard and accepted. Perhaps they are being bullied by a sibling or parent at home and finding some power at school.

Survival behaviour is often ugly, it makes people uncomfortable and scared. Adults - parents & teachers - want to control the errant child and stop their aggression but can get really stuck at the end point, the actual behaviour. Behaviour results from feelings of fear, isolation, helplessness, in fact the same feelings that the victim of bullies are left with.

There are no winners. The way we as adults deal with wounded children will dictate the outcome for both the perpetrator and the victim. Most of the strategies offered in my Bullying - Every Parent’s Guide to Supporting Your Child can be adapted for use with your child if they are acting out their own hurt, if they are the bully. Discovering your child is a bully immediately floods parents with guilt and shame. Breathe and be brave but this is not about you. No need to move into blame. Your child is suffering and you are in the box seat to help and support them.
Find the guide here and let’s chat if you need more support. ✨ https://offers.mazingminds.au/bullying-tips

23/11/2024

Bullying is a muddy game for all players.
Everyone gets dirty. No-one comes home clean. If you can keep the fight fair there is much to learn.

The way you guide your child to deal with bullying is going to be different from the way you would advise an adult. ‘Actions speak louder than words’ has never been truer than in the case of bullying in childhood.

When feeling or being attacked our survival mind kicks in and the fight, flight or freeze mechanism is activated. If your child’s first response is to confidently ‘fight back’ or stand up for themselves they’ll rarely have to tolerate a bully. They’re just too much trouble. The attacker will quickly get the message that they picked on the wrong kid.

If on the other hand your child’s survival instinct is to flee or freeze in fear, the bully get’s their reward. They feel powerful. Power is intoxicating for those that don’t feel enough, from the playground all the way through life. Be really clear on this, a bully is elevating themselves because they need to feel powerful. They may feel helpless at home so try to compensate when they’re at school. Perhaps they are copying the behaviour of a sibling or a parent.

A confident child doesn’t need to prove themselves by being more powerful than another.

The child being preyed upon needs to give the message that they deserve to be treated better. That they are enough. That’s your job mum and dad! Let your child know every day how wonderful they are, how much you see them, hear them, appreciate them, love them. A child that knows their value won’t be afraid. Get your Mazing Minds guide at https://offers.mazingminds.au/bullying-tips. Share strategies with your child, give them the tools to feel strong in their mind and their body.

Confident, loving parents create the greatest possibility for bringing up confident loving kids. If a situation your child is experiencing feels like it’s happening to you then seek support, find your centre and stand with them to learn and grow strong.

16/11/2024

Empowering your child and giving them strategies to thrive in a world full of people with unprocessed wounds is more powerful for your loved one than punitive measures administered to the schoolyard bully.

My advice to my Year 4 daughter dealing with bullying was - the games don’t change, the players just get older. Think of the dance mums, a past boss or coworker.

Help your child grow from this difficult experience by using this guide for parents to empower them. Get it now - https://offers.mazingminds.au/bullying-tips

14/09/2024

Command Miracles ✨
This illuminating online event presented by the Napoleon Hill Institute featured Natasha Bray on Day 3. Using her beautiful lilting Welsh voice she delivered a transformative Heart Imprint taster. Natasha expertly addressed both sides of the equation - being open to miracles and being able to receive them. I’m now primed and dangerously ready to both command and receive miracles in abundance.

14/09/2024

Make Your Vote Count

My earliest lesson on voting was in school when we voted for class captains. I wrestled with the idea of whether it was OK to vote for myself. Did I think I was better than others? Was I big noting myself or putting myself first? The rules of polite society confused me. I was embarrassed with the idea of voting for myself as it felt wrong somehow.

It was a long time before I had the confidence to publicly back myself until the question was put to me - if you don’t believe in yourself and your ability why should I believe in you? Done - I was a convert!

Belief in yourself leads to voting for yourself a hundred ways each day. Simply the thoughts you think can support you or sabotage you.

Support your campaign by:

😬 Facing a challenge not avoiding it - believing in your potential.
💬 Having a difficult conversation from a place of openness.
🙌 Celebrating even the smallest of wins to elevate your state.

All votes are of equal value.
All votes count.
How will you vote today?

07/09/2024

If you have normalised something that was traumatic, then you have become comfortable sleeping with the enemy.
Sarah Jakes Roberts

What is the most traumatic experience of your life and how does the residue of that experience show up in your present?

Trauma comes from the meaning we make from events. Big T trauma is easy to spot - a huge loss, a betrayal, a death. There is public support for our circumstance and we’re given space to cope with it, or not. Because our experience is familiar to the world, we accept our emotional response and meaning making.

Little t trauma is much more pernicious. Being yelled at as a child and feeling confused. Getting overlooked for the team. Feeling sad then being laughed at. We make meaning of each and every little t trauma - I’m bad, I’m not enough, I’m alone, until the impact becomes overwhelming. We question our feeling, wondering what is wrong with us. Moving on, sucking it up, slipping on the mask satisfies the outside world, after all, this kind of pain is just the human experience right?

What if you’re not broken or damaged? What if you could have a better human experience? How cool to have the strategies to process the little ts so when the big Ts come along you’re ready. You can stay present and cope.

Rapid Transformational Therapy is for the every woman and man. Many people wait until breaking point before they seek help and then the waiting list is long, the recovery is protracted. I accidentally got therapy when I didn’t think I needed it (while I was training 😆) and it’s the best thing I’ve ever done for myself.

Kick the enemy out of the bed and sleep easy, safe in the knowledge that you are enough, that you are not alone and that you can cope.

I have lots of spaces in September. Your challenge might be a quick fix for my fresh eyes or might take a bit longer, either way, you’re worth it!

www.mazingminds.au

31/08/2024

Life is Practice
You are practicing who you’re going to be.
If you’re getting up late and not getting your jobs done, that’s what you’re practicing
If you’re a whiner, you’re practicing being a whiner
It doesn’t just go away.
You have to start practicing who you want to be.
Do you want to be dependable? Then you have to BE dependable
If you want people to trust you, you have to be trustworthy.
Practice who you want to be every single day.
— Michelle Obama

So, after losing our netball semi-final today, I am practicing being a good sport. We were beaten by the better team on the day. I had too many unforced errors and I could focus on my poor effort, but to what end? If we’d won, after me playing the same number of unforced errors, I wouldn’t worry.

Today, I am going to practice being a good sport. I’m going to feel appreciative to even get to the semis, and I am going to celebrate the fact that I can run around with my team and feel alive!

Having a coach is a great way of getting clear on what it is you want to start practicing, every day.

www.mazingminds.au

25/08/2024

If you argue with reality, you’ll only lose 100% of the time

Just one more post in my Olympic series after reading a recent article about an athlete who didn’t medal. Several years later, she was getting her Olympic rings tattoo removed. As the symbol faded, so did her feelings of failure.

The reality:
* She was an elite athlete.
* She put her heart and soul into her sport.
* She had a team supporting her.
* She competed at the highest level.
* She represented her country with pride.
* She didn’t medal.
The argument was:
* All the training was for nothing.
* Because she didn’t medal, she failed.

Somewhere deep in our subconscious, we are imprinted with ideas of what we ‘should’ be doing and achieving, what makes us successful and worthy, and how life is supposed to unfold. These ideas and beliefs can keep us trapped in a story that was never going to be ours.

Accepting our reality is, in fact, the very first step in our evolution. Start from what is. Set your intention. Take action. Then reassess what is. Repeat. Athletes are disciplined, focused, diligent, strong, tenacious, and resilient in their journey. This doesn’t change on the other side of competition. They still have these incredible characteristics; they’ve just gone further and competed longer than you or me.

Win 100% of the time by being. Be uniquely you. Be.

18/08/2024

Why do I care so much?

The trolls are still trolling about the Olympic breaking competition. The inclusion of this “sport” has certainly been a conversation starter!

In my family, we have examined different perspectives but always seem to land on the integrity of Raygun. She wasn’t preening or posturing; she didn’t belittle anyone or attack back. What she did was play the whistle, like all good sportspeople do.

Whether you agree or disagree with the inclusion of breaking in the games or are judging the standard of the competition, I wonder - why do you care so much?

The sprinter who never moved beyond last place, the pole vaulter who couldn’t make lift-off, or the gymnast who fell off the equipment – they weren’t ridiculed or pilloried. In fact, they are usually celebrated because they are us. They messed up. Despite their knowledge, experience and hours of practice, they failed.

The trolls make it personal because it is personal for them. Their survival response is triggered, and they slip into fight mode as they lose sight of their target’s humanity. That’s what our deep wounds do to us, without our conscious permission.

When you’re all heated up, take a breath and ask, “Why do I care so much?” Answer honestly, and keep asking why until you get to your truth. Give yourself permission to fail, mess up and be wrong. Only then can you possibly reach your human potential.

12/08/2024

The Elusive Gold
Olympians show us that even with sustained hard work, talent and discipline our success is not guaranteed. Many have reported that paying specific attention to their mental fitness has been the ultimate key to their success.

We the every woman and man have our own mental health challenges and definitions of success and are equally thwarted.
While the Olympians play out their drama on the world stage, their pain is no greater or lesser than our own. We are them; we are human.

To achieve the success we’ve dreamed of we need to stop resisting. Lean in and discover how to use emotional wounds and challenges to drive us. The success you’ve dreamed of doesn’t have to live in your dreams.

If you’re inspired by the incredible human feats that the Olympics has brought to us and want to find out what you are capable of, make the decision now and transform your life.

Find success www.mazingminds.au

03/08/2024

Be conscious of your focus

It is so easy to look back on bad relationships and spot the red flags. It is much harder to spot them when you’re in the middle of it. You just know that you don’t feel so confident. Your body usually detects toxic behaviour before your mind does. If your chest feels tight, you are probably not feeling safe and respected.

Instead of being on the lookout for those sneaky, subtle red flags try something new. Focus on the green flags. Focus on the way you want to feel. Focus on the way you deserve to be treated. Use these uplifting behaviours as your new metric and choose to be with people who support you and cheer you on.

28/07/2024

Life - some go through it, others grow through it.

Not thriving?
Just going through the motions?

When your bucket is full, weighed down by past events and pain, life can feel so heavy. You feel overwhelmed, stuck, at your absolute limit, buffeted about constantly enduring challenges that threaten to take you down.

Life doesn’t start at the end of a difficult situation. We can’t hold our breath.

But what if you could empty your bucket?

That’s what we do at Mazing Minds. Release the overflow, the overwhelm and limitations. We reframe your story, lift the weight and create space so you are able to take in the world as it is.

Everything we go through is preparing us. We have such an opportunity to grow during testing times.

What pain in your life can you consider pivotal to your capabilities now?
Can you think of a less than ideal situation in your life that grew something unique or strong in you?

Make your pain a story worth telling because it led you to a great self-discovery.
Prepare for your Spring 🌱 let’s take the overflow and grow something spectacular ✨

12/07/2024

If you neglect your . . .

* plants
* music practice
* exercise routine
* healthy eating

If you don’t pay attention to your . . .

* thoughts
* words
* actions
* relationships

there is a slow withering, a loss.

But when you . . .

* water the plants
* strum the guitar
* walk around the block
* eat from the earth

there is a strengthening, a building.

And when you . . .

* think with acceptance
* speak with compassion
* act with intention
* love with sacrifice

there is a blooming, a life.

11/06/2024

What have I been up to?

Well there is never a dull moment in my head so I took one of my crazy ideas and ran with it.

I’ve created an innovative course for young umpires that is less about the rules of the game and more about the rules of the brain. The Ultimate Netball Umpire is a 90 min online course at the end of which our young officials will embody their authority on the court and have a template for conquering life’s challenges.

WHY would I target such a niche market. I say, why not?

Netball is my game, still 🏐 I will only hang up my bib when my body tells me to and so far it’s game on! The PROBLEM IS - we have games cancelled because there are no umpires. Would you be a sports official? It’s a tough gig and despite the courage of our kids and the hours of mentoring our fabulous netball associations put in, many umpires don’t stick around.

Umpiring is scary for a 12 year old. It is a lot of responsibility, especially for those that care. The Ultimate Netball Umpire speaks to the heart and the mind and powers up these brave souls. They are worth it.

There is a special corner of the internet dedicated to netball umpires, spread the word 🤗🏐



The Ultimate Netball Umpire
https://offers.mazingminds.au/the-ultimate-netball-umpire

11/06/2024

What have I been up to?

Well there is never a dull moment in my head so I took one of my crazy ideas and ran with it.

I’ve created an innovative course for young umpires that is less about the rules of the game and more about the rules of the brain. The Ultimate Netball Umpire is a 90 min online course at the end of which our young officials will embody their authority on the court and have a template for conquering life’s challenges.

WHY would I target such a niche market. I say, why not?

Netball is my game, still 🏐 I will only hang up my bib when my body tells me to and so far it’s game on! The PROBLEM IS - we have games cancelled because there are no umpires. Would you be a sports official? It’s a tough gig and despite the courage of our kids and the hours of mentoring our fabulous netball associations put in, many umpires don’t stick around.

Umpiring is scary for a 12 year old. It is a lot of responsibility, especially for those that care. The Ultimate Netball Umpire speaks to the heart and the mind and powers up these brave souls. They are worth it.

There is a special corner of the internet dedicated to netball umpires, spread the word 🤗🏐

29/04/2024

08/01/2024

Birthdays and other dreaded celebrations . . .

Do you get excited in the lead up to your birthday or does it fill you with dread? The experience of your birthday as a child will inform your experience going forward. January birthdays are fraught with opinion:
🏝️There’s no point having a party, everyone is away at this time of the year.
🥳 We’re all partied out, time to go back to work.
📅 Poor you, nothing to look forward to for a whole year!
Not to mention the groan about the expense of Christmas 🤑 and the joint Christmas and birthday presents, which for a kid can be confusing and disappointing.

I’ve just had a birthday and I was filled with the all too familiar angst in the lead up. Thanks to Rapid Transformational Therapy, the gift 🎁 that keeps on giving, I have the tools to confront the familiar discomfort and challenge my birthday beliefs. This recalibration brought a sense of peace to my birthday, finally.

There are a myriad of celebrations and anniversaries throughout the year that can derail you, just when you think you’ve moved on. Kick off your year with an inner cleanse and turn the dread around. Receive the gift of healing delivered through the incredible power of RTT. Contact me now to secure a spot in January and make this a year to remember.

www.mazingminds.com.au
boost@mazingminds.com.au

03/01/2024

365 new days, 365 new chances!

Are your relationships like fireworks? Did the promise of fun and excitement of Christmas & New Year diminish just as quickly? Do you dread family get togethers?

Every day that you grow you get to live an updated version of yourself. Taking new chances brings challenge and expansion. So, keep growing, keep updating and slide into next Christmas an updated version of you that has a new empowering perspective on the antics of a family celebration.

My job is to help you bring the best out of yourself and I love my job! Together we will remove the barriers to more fulfilling relationships and a deeper understanding about family dynamics so you can comfortably celebrate with true joy.

Happy New Year! 361 days still left - take a chance.