Broken Child Grown Into a Broken Woman with a Broken System 2023

03/09/2024

I don't think many people realize how difficult it is for others to step out of their comfort zone, even for the most shallow and simple things. I, for one, don't even like watching movies I haven't seen before, and l'd rather listen to the same music on my playlist from ten years ago instead of trying my luck with the shuffle.

That's why it always thrills me when someone dares to listen to my story. When someone actually tries to know me, and have a look at the world from my perspective. I don't really have much to offer, so I'll always have a special place for those who saw something in me that I'm still yet to understand.

You see, I don't think many people realize how difficult it is for others to step out of their comfort zone, but I do. And I'll always treasure the way some stepped out of theirs just to spend some time sitting next to me, even for just a little while.

My Indelible Ink
🎨Michael Mantel

03/09/2024

Please stay alive isn’t a sentiment that ends with those three words. It continues on into each day after we make that plea. It manifests by making this life one that has less suffering, and more support. It provides the kind of community that not only believes that better days are ahead, but wants to put in the work to make them possible for everyone.

Su***de Prevention Month is here, and it means a lot to our crew the way that people show up and show out during this time. Our goal of $200,000 is not one we can manage alone, but it’s necessary for us to keep providing the help and hope that we’re known for. Please consider making a donation, even $5, in honor of the work we’re doing this month and all year round. You can donate right now at https://give.twloha.com/campaign/suicide-prevention-month/c602078

Please stay alive, friends. You are not a burden.

03/09/2024

We exist on a 4.5 billion year old rock
floating in an unfathomable expanse
of nothing-ness
you and I
we are magnetically held in place
by an invisible force
along with 8 billion other people.

every single thing that exists on this rock
is without doubt a work of art
so intricately crafted
we will never truly discover the scope of wonder within

we are made of the same elements
as everything that naturally surrounds us
just shaken up differently
and oh so magnificently

look at us, my friends.
we are breathtaking
our breath alone
the power in that act
is breathtaking

everything you are doing right now
reading, feeling, understanding
is fascinatingly complex
and yet we spend our days worrying about things
that are of no significance at all
big-picture

walk around your world today
with awe in your eyes
and really see what you are living.

every aspect of this life
is nothing short of astonishing
and this rock we are clinging to with ease
is astounding.

eyes open, reach out, breathe deep

take it all in

this rock, our home,
will know each of us
for only a heartbeat in its timeline.

leave only love
live with only gratitude
look with only wonder.

~ 'This Rock' by Donna Ashworth from 'Wild Hope'

~ Art by Julia Arnt

31/08/2024

31/08/2024

"The weight of unspoken words is heavier than any burden we carry. It is the weight of things left unsaid, of emotions buried deep, of truths hidden away in the dark corners of our minds. And as that weight grows, it begins to crush us, to suffocate us, until we are no longer able to speak, no longer able to express the things we need to say, the things that could free us from the prison of our own silence."

— Alice Walker, The Color Purple

31/08/2024

As Self-Awareness Month comes to a close, try one of these journal prompts to reflect.

24/07/2024

"Shout out to those who feel empty. To those who force themselves to wash and eat.
Shout out to those who feel tired and sad and can't say a word to anyone because nothing comes out.
shout out to those who hide all the pain and heart break just not to bother anyone and keep a lovely tired smile on their faces all the time.
Shout out to those who want to yell and scream and cry their eye balls out but they try to keep calm not to lose their s**t.
Shout out to the fighters, the survivors, those who keep trying every single day even though they may give up along the way but manage to get up again.
Shout out to all of you here and everyone out there doing all they can do just to push through.
You're doing your best and I'm proud of you."

— Rahma Djebbari

24/07/2024

Be careful about having relationships with people with no emotional intelligence. They will never understand you, they will personalize everything,and you will never be seen and heard.

Be careful about having relationships with people who can't regulate their emotions you will always be at the mercy of their rages, and bad moods.

Be careful about having relationships with people with no self awareness, they have no idea how their behavior affects the people around them, so it's a matter of time before you get hurt.

Be careful about having relationships with people without empathy, they will never see or care about how you feel.

If no one has ever told you, I am telling you now.
Look for people in your life with emotional intelligence, self awareness, empathy and the ability to regulate their emotions or you will be at the mercy of their dysfunction and pay the price for their
immaturity and lack of growth.

-Maria Consiglio

20/07/2024

❤️

20/07/2024

Sometimes, I feel like my chest will explode out of the pain that I've been enduring for so long. I keep fighting each day, hoping that better days are coming. I keep telling myself that this pain will disappear and I will be okay again someday. But the truth is, a part of me is already tired of waiting for my pain to end. I am silently telling myself that maybe this pain will never disappear and that I must learn to live with it. I'm already tired of telling lies to myself— saying that tomorrow will be a better day but still ending up feeling miserable and lonely.

It's hard to go on with my life, pretending that everything is okay. I sometimes wish I could give up, but I know that I should have courage in everything that I'm going through right now. But it's hard to think about positive things in life when I honestly feel like everything in my life is falling apart. It's hard when I feel like I no longer have the will to face the world every day.

— Shiori X
Art: Giselle Dekel

17/07/2024

Don't leave anything for later.
Later, the coffee gets cold.
Later, you lose interest.
Later, the day turns into night.
Later, people grow up.
Later, people grow old.
Later, life goes by.
Later, you regret not doing something...
When you had the chance.

Life is a fleeting dance, a delicate balance of moments that unfold before us, never to return in quite the same way again.
Regret is a bitter pill to swallow, a weight that bears down upon the soul with the burden of missed chances and unspoken words.
So, let us not leave anything for later. Let us seize the moments as they come, with hearts open and arms outstretched to embrace the possibilities that lie before us. For in the end, it is not the things we did that we regret, but the things we left undone, the words left unspoken, the dreams left unfulfilled.
— Before the Coffee Gets Cold is a 2015 novel by Toshikazu Kawaguchi
🎨Ctto

17/07/2024

😷🤒🤕💔

17/07/2024

A lot of people say, “Trust that inner voice.” But if you were raised by multiple people, especially multiple toxic people—maybe step parents, half siblings, temporary caretakers, whoever—you may have acquired multiple inner voices to help you cope with all these different kinds of people. And all these inner voices can be loud, contradictory and confusing!

If this is your experience, maybe it’s not so much about trusting your inner voice, bc *everything* you hear may feel wrong, wrong, wrong…

And I’m not sure the answer is to figure out which voice is yours, either.

Maybe instead, it’s about developing your voice.

By deliberately sitting down with yourself or with a trusted listener, and figuring out what’s most important to you right now.

And then developing a voice that’s aligned with what’s most important to you right now.

Sometimes I think of this voice as my inner elected official, that represents the values and ideas that are most important to me, values I can anchor to and consult with when the chaos of life feels like it’s sweeping me away.

So that when I’m really triggered by someone’s behavior, I can consult this inner voice I’m developing rather than allowing one of those contradictory voices I’ve internalized to tell me I ought to just suck it up and deal with that feeling of being stuck and unexpressed, and then lash out later when another voice fills me with indignation.

The inner voice I'm developing might not always “feel” like the right voice, but I see it as more of a commitment I’ve made to represent my most healed perspective and ideas and to use my skills to communicate-to-be-understood.

This doesn’t mean my voice won’t grow as I collect more experiences and widen my perspective, because part of what’s important to me is to stay flexible.

And it doesn’t mean I need to try and get rid of all those other voices and perspectives. They’ll probably still be there, and that’s fine. I can accept that they’re there and understand why they’re there, because that’s also important to me—to see through the lens of understanding and compassion.

Affirmation:

Today, I will make a choice that’s aligned with something that’s meaningful to me instead of making choices based on what I imagine might earn some stamp of approval from all those people from my past.

And if all I do today is give myself kindness instead of shame, that’s more than enough. In fact, it’s huge. Bc that’s how we shift the space—from being one that we want to escape, to being one that nurtures us and offers us peace.

-JLK

(My new book, Once Upon an Upset, is an illustrated collection of stories, insights and reflections to help make sense of difficult times. If you're interested, I'll post a link in the comments.💛)