01/12/2025
The bullet train and the brick wall - they often find each other in long-term love.
Once upon a time, it all felt easier - lighter, more playful, with time and space to explore. You could take your time. There wasn’t the pressure of kids, careers, exhaustion, or responsibility.
There was curiosity, and you met somewhere in the middle.
But life got busier.�The mental load got heavier.�And s^x started to feel like something that needed to happen - rather than something that simply did.
What research shows is that the most fulfilling s*x lives are built on low-pressure, high-frequency connection: everyday touches, kisses, conversations, and moments that build erotic energy gently and consistently.
But that’s not what usually happens.
Instead, fear starts to take over.�Fear that if I don’t initiate, our s^x life will disappear.�Fear that we’re drifting apart.�Fear that I’m too much - or not enough.
And so, one partner becomes the bullet train - charging in, always ready, every touch leading somewhere, trying to create connection through pursuit.
The other becomes the brick wall - feeling the pressure, flinching, shutting down, creating space and distance because they haven’t yet built the trust that says they have choice, agency, and willingness…because EVERY touch/glance/hint sets off the freight train to destination-penetration - so off feels like the only safe option.
Neither is wrong.�Both are trying to protect love.
But the more the bullet train pushes, the more the brick wall closes.
�And the more the brick wall closes, the faster and louder the freight train becomes.
Until what used to be an easy dance turns into a cycle of pressure, rejection, and disconnection - and both partners feel unseen, unwanted, and misunderstood.
The truth is, your erotic connection doesn’t live in extremes - it lives in the space between.�Between pressure and pause.�Between giving and receiving.�Between the bullet train and the brick wall.
That’s where desire breathes again.�That’s where love feels alive.
💬 If you see yourselves in this story - you’re not alone.�These dynamics are deeply human and incredibly common in long-term love.�And the good news? They can change.
Book a free 15-minute call and let’s talk about what’s really happening beneath the surface - and how to start finding your way back to connection, safety, and desire.
🖤 You don’t have to keep running the same pattern. You just need a new rhythm.
Book your free call → julietenner.love/book-online