Julie Tenner

08/10/2025

✨ “This is a safe space.”
You’ve heard it said before, right?

But here’s the truth:
Safety isn’t something you can declare for someone else.
It’s not a default. It’s not a vibe. And it’s certainly not a blanket statement.

Safety is individual.
It’s contextual. Relational. Consent-based.

Whether we’re talking about intimate relationships, community spaces, group programs, or workplace settings — real safety doesn’t come from assuming, it comes from asking.

👉 What does safe actually mean to this person?
👉 What are the cues, agreements, or behaviours that allow them to feel grounded, heard, and protected?

In any space — physical, emotional, digital — we don’t get to say “this is safe” unless we’ve asked each individual what safety means to them, and have listened deeply enough to build that experience with them.

So instead of declaring a space “safe,”
co-create it. Ask questions. Invite feedback. Make agreements.

If you’re leading a group, a conversation, a relationship — here are a few powerful prompts to begin with:

– What is safety to you?
– What do YOU need to feel safe?
– What do you need from me?

Because real inclusion starts when we stop assuming what people need…
And start creating space for them to tell us.

**ra

08/10/2025

Here’s a wild but liberating truth:
You and your partner are probably wrong about what the other is thinking… 9 times out of 10.

Not because you’re bad at love.
But because your brain is brilliant at making up stories based on past experiences, not present reality.

“I thought you were mad at me.”
“I assumed you didn’t care.”
“I figured you were avoiding the truth.”

Sound familiar?

In this conversation, we unpack how often we get it wrong—both of us—and how staying in the story keeps us stuck in resentment, disconnection, and misattunement.

What breaks the cycle?
✦ Talking about it in real time
✦ Staying curious
✦ Letting your partner surprise you

This episode is the tender, funny, and honest truth of what it looks like inside a real relationship—when you drop the assumptions and actually learn to listen.

🎧 NTM 509: Inside Our Bedroom and Beyond
https://open.spotify.com/episode/6e1Kis2mvp3RSl4nb8uezf?si=a3f9b54e6c4443af

06/10/2025

If you can’t name your truth clearly yet - if it takes more than five words to explain, or you feel confused and flooded - you’re probably not ready to share it out loud.

And that’s okay.

It means your work right now isn’t to speak it - it’s to own it.

If the feelings are in you, they’re for you.
That’s the grown-up version of emotional maturity:

“This is mine to work with.”
Not: “This is your fault.”

Because when you share from that place of grounded clarity, instead of emotional discharge, your truth lands.
It connects.
It heals.

So if you’re not there yet - don’t force it.
Come back to these questions tomorrow.
Let your emotions move through your body.
Cry. Rage. Shake. Walk. Breathe.
Then ask again: What is the truth underneath this?

You’ll know you’re ready when your heart feels soft, not explosive.
And when your truth feels like a bridge, not a weapon.

06/10/2025

Your moans, sighs, arches, stillness, nudges, breath, melt—
These aren’t for him.
They’re for you.

Because your body is your language.
And if you’re not speaking it, he has no idea what’s going on.
You stay disconnected. Unmet. Dull.

🧠 He’s not ignoring your needs.
He just can’t feel them.

Feminine responsiveness is the bridge.
✨ The bridge between him fumbling in the dark…
and him already giving you what you didn’t even know you needed.

💡It’s how he learns your body.
It’s how you teach him—without a word.
Not by explaining. By responding.

🌀So let yourself move. Let your hips sway. Let your breath deepen. Let your body speak.

Because when you do?
You get met. You get seen. You get ravished.

📲Send this to your girlfriends who’ve been wondering why he “just doesn’t get it.” This is why.

04/10/2025

Your feminine isn’t how you look.

It’s how deeply you feel.
It’s not about ticking off a vibe or matching an aesthetic.
It’s not about being soft enough, sexy enough, radiant enough.

Returning to your feminine isn’t a performance.

It’s a homecoming.
It’s about how connected you are to you — how much space you give yourself to feel, to know, to listen.

This part of you isn’t for display.
It’s for depth.
It’s for the knowing in your bones.

The part that whispers when something’s off.
The part that blooms when you finally stop fighting your body and start trusting it again.

This is the conversation we’re having in Ep 517: What It Really Means to Come Home to Your Feminine.

🎧 Listen here:
https://open.spotify.com/episode/5MRHI7LbNt791JvGYyedlX?si=749afd1de23c4a0d

🧡 If you’re done performing and ready to feel more like you, come join us in Honey Club.

We reconnect you to your softness, your body, your power. Link in bio.

02/10/2025

I love seeing my book shared around the world 🙌

If you can’t name your truth clearly yet - if it takes more than five words to explain, or you feel confused and flooded - you’re probably not ready to share it out loud.

And that’s okay.

It means your work right now isn’t to speak it - it’s to own it.

If the feelings are in you, they’re for you.
That’s the grown-up version of emotional maturity:

“This is mine to work with.”
Not: “This is your fault.”

Because when you share from that place of grounded clarity, instead of emotional discharge, your truth lands.
It connects.
It heals.

So if you’re not there yet - don’t force it.
Come back to these questions tomorrow.
Let your emotions move through your body.
Cry. Rage. Shake. Walk. Breathe.
Then ask again: What is the truth underneath this?

You’ll know you’re ready when your heart feels soft, not explosive.
And when your truth feels like a bridge, not a weapon.

02/10/2025

“Julie is the best therapist I’ve worked with - by a mile.”
That one sentence alone? I’ll carry it with me forever.

This beautiful client shared how the daily Voxer support completely shifted what therapy could feel like:
💛 Bite-sized insights that fit into the pockets of her day
💛 No pressure to “perform” in a single big session
💛 Just honest, evolving support — right when she needed it

For the mums. The stretched. The ones doing deep work while juggling life.
This is therapy that moves with you.
This is healing that sticks.

If you want to feel seen, supported, and sparked back to life, I’m here.
Book a free 15-min chat and let’s see what suits you best.
💻 julietenner.love/book-online

02/10/2025

The “Off Switch” for Arousal: Stress, Overwhelm, and Exhaustion

Imagine your body has a gas pedal (turn-on) and a brake pedal (shut down).
�For most women, their brake is way too active:�🚨 Mental load (tracking everything in life)�🚨 Emotional labor (caring for everyone’s needs)�🚨 High stress (job, kids, responsibilities)�🚨 Body shame or self-judgment�🚨 Feeling disconnected from a partner

If your brake is constantly being pressed, it doesn’t matter how much “gas” you try to add—you’re not going anywhere.

30/09/2025

I asked Nick: “If you didn’t have me, would you have the relationship tools you have now?”
He said no.

Because—truthfully—most men just don’t talk about relationships.
And that baffles me.

Because for so many women, it’s a core part of life.
Something we think about, work on, talk about—constantly.

But where do men go when it’s hard?
When they’re not coping?
When they feel disconnected but don’t have the language—or the culture—that supports asking for help?

Yes, there are men’s groups.
Yes, some men are doing this work.
But let’s be honest: it’s still the exception, not the norm.

And I’m worried about that.
I’m worried about the men who are struggling in silence.
Who have no one in their circle they could talk to without fear of ridicule.

Who don’t seek help - not because they don’t want to grow, but because they genuinely don’t know where to turn.
So where do men go if they’re struggling in their relationship and can’t bring it to their mates?

That’s the question we sit with in this episode.
And maybe the one we need to be asking more often.

🎧 Listen here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6e1Kis2mvp3RSl4nb8uezf?si=a3f9b54e6c4443af

25/09/2025

📻 Carrum Radio – On The Up Podcast

🎙 We went there — intimacy, s^x, and what it really means to feel alive in love.

On On The Up podcast, we explored:

💥 Why intimacy and s^x are different — and why you need both

💥 How sexual identity shapes your vitality (I shared my own story of being q***r and ENM by nature, choosing monogamy by design)

💥 Why many couples survive without intimacy or s^x — but slowly wilt in resentment, co-parenting, and shutdown

💡 Takeaway: You can’t have electric s^x without emotional glue. It’s time to stop performing, start feeling, and come home to your erotic truth.

🎧 Listen here: https://soundcloud.com/radiocarrum/on-the-up-episode-11-better

^xAndIntimacy

23/09/2025

The “Off Switch” for Arousal: Stress, Overwhelm, and Exhaustion

Imagine your body has a gas pedal (turn-on) and a brake pedal (shut down).

For most women, their brake is way too active:
🚨 Mental load (tracking everything in life)
🚨 Emotional labor (caring for everyone’s needs)
🚨 High stress (job, kids, responsibilities)
🚨 Body shame or self-judgment
🚨 Feeling disconnected from a partner

If your brake is constantly being pressed, it doesn’t matter how much “gas” you try to add—you’re not going anywhere.