28/08/2025
Trauma, it changes the very make up of a Human Being and our very chemistry and connection from where WE came.
The brain goes into survival mode, and does not seam to ever change gear. There is a quickening of rapid thoughts when we enter Flight or Fight mode. The spinning of these thoughts brings on impulsiveness in all areas of ones life, bad decisions and and inability to centre, to feel at peace and safe.
The physical separates and abandons the Soul, and takes flight.....and does not stop for nothing as to not go back to the space of madness all the while trying to come with a story why this happened, what happened. For most the reliving of the trauma, the atmosphere of the experience, and its destructive vibration never leave.
WE fall into an unconsciousness where the trauma is fed fed and not nurtured, for many reasons. Shame and blame again, and most do not like to talk of such dark things, and most could not understand such DARK THINGS. Guilt, suppression, suffering.
There is a disconnection between the physical ( which is a very small percent, we are 99% No Thing) And this 99% is forgotten by the traumatised mind. It associates its feeling, its vibration with that of the Low Vibrational trauma and all is unaligned as the focus now becomes purely physical in fear of more trauma.
WE forget everything, who and what we are....and fall into the illusion and the prison of mind possession. Our Light goes out, and we are left in utter darkness and disrepair.
WE are unaware of the brakes, tears and holes in our Auric Field that trauma brings. WE are unaware that our Aura acts as a filter for vibration, frequency and energy, that is keeps our Chakras and energy centres clear and unblocked and these openings cause our energy to leak and for other energies to come in.
This is where dis-ease begins. WE are lost in an illusion that makes on sense, we learn to adapt to our environment and the ego, story of the mind takes over, and the Victim is birthed.
Unaware and Unconscious the survival instinct always lingers and in its wake leaves confusion and a life path of a Soul searching for comfort, relief from the inner suffering, anything for it to stop.
Anything for Peace.
Unconsciously WE now stumble into a way of being that is so far from the truth, and most, for a life time...maybe life times, carry around what was never theirs to carry. Cloaked in Shame and Blame and trapped in a cruel and harsh existence that makes no sense. There is only suffering here.
Most trauma happens when we are very young, no more than babies. The vibration of the trauma and the bad feeling accompanies us through our growing years and we are shaped and conditioned due to the vibration of the mould. WE fight an invisible battle always and start to believe WE are bad and deserve this for some reason. And Isolation begins. Like attracts like and trauma after trauma then follow.
So does rejection of all that is, and most of all the Self. Addiction, homelessness, mental illness, chronic dis-ease, relationship troubles, learning difficulties, eating disorders, isolation, depression, violence, dysfunction that leads many a time to su***de, for the release of the never ending throb of not belong here and just to breathe is to suffer. You feel like you are burning alive from the inside out and it never ever stops.
Layer after layer of disconnection from Self and no remembrance at all of what and who WE truly are. Infliction on infliction. Our PainBodies are nourished with self abuse, self hate, self sabotage and an energy pattern that is left to fester....will not only consume the host but also be passed on to their children and live on for generations. For energy never leaves it can only be transformed.
All of this becomes the identity, who and what we think we are.
The drug addict, the black sheep, the naught sibling, the trouble maker......the human's biological make up is to fall into these rolls, weather good for us or bad. The ego needs an identity.....and here we fall into yet another prison. One we ourselves lock ourselves in and soon forget that it is only US that holds the key.
There is no reality here at all. There is a loss of hope, of joy, of love, of light.....and soon anyone that brings up Spirit or Connection to a All Loving Source.....you hate it, and it brings the worst out in you. It makes you feel rage. You cannot even let this go on...you wish to tell me some home truths. Honestly, I should see the real world, your world. Experience it for a day and shut the hell up.
A couple of Questions
How is that working for you??
If my words hold no energy and not of any truth, why are you triggered and angry with me right now ??
Could it be that hope has only ever lead you deeper into your darkness. Could it be you are afraid of believing in my words, be given a gift of hope you will be released from your prison only to find there is not a way. You think you would not survive that again. Everyone and everything lest you down, its hopeless and cruel to even consider.
Let me say, I believe you would survive. You are a warrior, look at what you have survived. You are much stronger than you know......you are so much more than you know.
I speak my truth for you to hear, for you see, I burnt alive in that abyss you think you are held prisoner in for 41 years.I found the other side of Hell at my rock bottom. For you see, I thought I had nothing else I could loose. I had lost my pride, self respect, my way....my Self. I could not go on another moment as I was, keep the company of who I was. It was a pain way beyond wanting to take my own life, there was no thought of this. I just let go inside.
The fight, what I was running from, the pain, the pathetic thing I thought I was, trying to make sense of it all. I just let it all go, all of it and even welcomed the sensation that my soul was on fire for ever more. I whispered "Take Me, NO MORE.....Take Me.
In a blink of an eye all changed. In that moment I found what I had been looking for my whole life, maybe lives. Whom was here with me, whom I was speaking to......the throb of sorrow and loss was no more, the feeling of not belonging and the pain of breathing....gone. What was this Space????
As Light filled the darkness, Consciousness replaced Unconsciousness and every part of my body started to tingle to come alive, I had never felt so alive......and so blissful and joyous.
Words of silence, louder than any sound. A feeling of Love, Light, Belonging and a wholeness I never dreamed possible. All fractals of myself come together like a magnet went on. I don't know if they came to me, or I to them, i don't know if anything moved at all, I felt everywhere and no where.
This Space, This Being.........I never wish to leave. There are no Earthly words for this space, for in the physical....it cannot exist.
I felt myself drift back onto the floor in my room, still on my knees, with tears that I had never been cried before streaming down my face. I regained consciousness, and as if on cue there was thunder and the thunders words thundered through my very core,
"I AM Here, I AM Always Here".
The words needed no explaining, they were a fractal of my being, my existence and in a blink of an eye I knew exactly who and what I was......and that I had finally found what was missing all along, after a long and epic journey I had stumbled through the Gate-less Gate of the One in the Many and the Many in the One.
The second death, the death of Self....never to be the same again. Never to be in darkness.
For the first time All made sense, all was understood, the pain, the trauma all off it. For the first time, I felt magic and a love like I never knew existed. I felt all with in me heal, it was all lies and illusion and the truth shines from with in me.
This Space changes everything, your very make up, your very being and your very existence and there is no going back, not that one would want to.
For you see, it is all a process, an unravelling as NO-one can pass though the Gateless Gate and in order to pass.......One must become NO ONE.
And so it is 🙏
KyRa 💋
