Healing Adoption Trauma

Healing Adoption Trauma Mother-infant separation causes trauma and attachment disruption, which is often felt over a lifetime

So many adoptees grow up hearing, “You were chosen. You were lucky.”But few are ever asked, “What did you lose?”In this ...
14/08/2025

So many adoptees grow up hearing, “You were chosen. You were lucky.”

But few are ever asked, “What did you lose?”

In this raw and unflinching interview, therapist Paul Sunderland speaks to the truth so many of us know in our bones — that the wound of separation can echo through our lives, sometimes showing up in addiction, depression or relationships.

If you’ve lived it, loved someone through it or want to understand it… please listen.

What parts of this conversation resonate with you most?

🎧 Listen below

Thank you to Jigsaw Post-Adoption Centre Queensland for your ongoing support to those impacted by Forced Adoption policies and practices 🙏🏼

🎧 New Episode Out Now!

Today on Jigsaw Queensland's Adopt Perspective Podcast, we’re thrilled to be joined by the brilliant Paul Sunderland—a leading addiction specialist and psychotherapist whose work has deeply resonated with the adoption community around the world.

With over 35 years of experience, Paul brings powerful insight into the lifelong effects of adoption, including how early separation from our mothers can shape identity, mental health, and increase vulnerability to addiction. His viral talks on YouTube for Life Works and the Adult Adoptee Movement have become essential viewing for many navigating adoption-related trauma and complex PTSD.

In this episode, we explore these issues in depth—and offer hope, clarity, and validation for adopted people and information for parents of loss, adoptive parents, and professionals working in this space.

👉 Listen now on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Deezer, Castbox, Pocket Casts, Amazon Music, Overcast and here:
https://www.jigsawqueensland.com/podcast

YouTube (video available): https://www.youtube.com/

14/08/2025

New Adopt Perspective podcast episode out now!

At Jigsaw Queensland, we’re proud to be offering another exciting project made possible through our Forced Adoption Support Service Small Grant Funding.

We’ve partnered with Axis Clinic to offer a powerful new 10-week online group therapy program designed specifically for adopted people impacted by Australia’s forced adoption era. It’s called 'How Attachment Styles Affect Adopted People', and it offers a safe, trauma-informed space to explore the lasting impacts of adoption on identity, relationships, and how we connect with others. To tell us all about it and how you can get involved, we're joined by two wonderful guests: Helen Angela Taylor, CEO of Jigsaw Queensland, and Anna Lanyon, a Mental Health Social Worker from Axis Clinic.

🎧 Listen now on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Deezer, Castbox, Pocket Casts, Amazon Music, Overcast and here:
https://www.jigsawqueensland.com/podcast
YouTube Link: https://www.youtube.com/

The program will run online every Thursday evening from 6:30 to 8:30pm, starting August 21st. To register or find out more, email admin@axisclinic.com.au.

What is a truncated attachment cry?
14/08/2025

What is a truncated attachment cry?

I asked the Academy what also happens when infant eyes meet absence, as it did for many of us relinquished/taken at birt...
14/08/2025

I asked the Academy what also happens when infant eyes meet absence, as it did for many of us relinquished/taken at birth.

This was their response…

“That’s such an important point, Monique — thank you for bringing it in.

As Janina Fisher often teaches, when there is an absence of consistent, loving gaze in those first weeks or months, the nervous system learns early on that eye contact is not a place of safety or comfort. For many, especially those separated from their mothers at birth, this lack of attunement can make it deeply uncomfortable — even decades later — to meet the eyes of someone who cares.

In her work, Janina talks about honoring this protective adaptation and beginning very slowly — sometimes with moments of connection that don’t require direct gaze — until the body can start to trust that some kinds of looking are safe. It’s a gentle, gradual process, and the courage it takes is immense.

We so appreciate the work you’re doing with adoptees navigating these tender, early attachment wounds.”

This is a must read, highlighting recent research and terminology about the impact of trauma on an infant in utero.
08/06/2025

This is a must read, highlighting recent research and terminology about the impact of trauma on an infant in utero.

BEN & IN-UTERO, BIRTH & SEPARATION EVENTS

Science has been aware of the involvement of the autonomic nervous system, ANS, in pain, hunger, fear and rage since 1915, courtesy of research performed by Walter Bradford Canon, [1]. Yet the first official recognition of trauma’s involvement with the ANS didn’t occur until 1980 when the American Psychiatric Association, (APA), added Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, (PTSD), to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, (DSM-III). And, whilst the DSM-III did also explicitly address and classify mental disorders in children, [2], it took nearly twenty years more for the ACE Study to show the traumatic impact of adverse experiences in childhood and adolescence, (1995-1997). However, there was still no automatic extrapolation to the impact of adversity even earlier in life: in-utero, during or after birth – now referred to as Adverse Babyhood Experiences, ABEs, [3]. All despite foetuses and perinatal babies possessing an ANS!

Our ANS actually begins functioning in the womb, e.g., using ultrasound it is possible to hear a heartbeat as early as the sixth week of gestational age, [4]. Then, in the third trimester our vagus nerve becomes myelinated, [5]. All indicates that regulatory activity mediated by the ANS begins in-utero and contributes significantly to foetal development, [6]. Thus, it follows that if we have an ANS in-utero, we also have emotions and so can have sensory experience too. But more importantly, an ANS in-utero means we are also at risk of trauma in-utero just as we are after birth or any other time in our life.

In fact, foetal or post-natal complications, (e.g. maternal pathologies; birth difficulties; the stressful environment of an incubator, [7], [8]; the lack of skin-to-skin contact), have been shown to impair maturation of the ANS, [9]. The latter is no small matter when ANS maturation influences development of our whole brain and thus impacts our behaviour, our stress response and our mood regulation.

The bottom line: the fact that the ANS is present in us when we are an embryo, a foetus and a newborn puts us at risk of BEN far earlier than we ever realise. Ignorance of this fact is obscuring visibility of the trauma origin of many diseases in our society.

MORE INFORMATION:

📌 Introduction of BEN: https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=894198262721482&set=a.457198723088107

📌 Proposed link between BEN and Mental illness later in life:
https://www.facebook.com/somatictao/videos/1022711879639033

📌 Initial results of ABEs Survey: https://www.facebook.com/chronicillnesstraumastudies/posts/1179576644173141?notif_id=1738967061305781¬if_t=mention&ref=notif

RESEARCH:

[1] Cannon, W. B. (1915). Bodily changes in pain, hunger, fear and rage: An account of recent researches into the function of emotional excitement. D Appleton & Company.
https://psycnet.apa.org/doi/10.1037/10013-000

[2] Robert L. Spitzer, Dennis P. Cantwell, The DSM-III Classification of the Psychiatric Disorders of Infancy, Childhood, and Adolescence, Journal of the American Academy of Child Psychiatry, Volume 19, Issue 3, 1980, Pages 356-370,
ISSN 0002-7138, https://doi.org/10.1016/S0002-7138(09)61059-1

[3] Mead V., Comprehensive Guide to Adverse Babyhood Experiences and Chronic Illness (Free eBook and ABE Fact Sheets For Your Doctor). 2019
https://chronicillnesstraumastudies.com/abes-chronic-illness/

[4] Rodgers S. K., Chang C., DeBardeleben J. T., Horrow M. M. (2015). Normal and abnormal US findings in early first-trimester pregnancy: review of the society of radiologists in ultrasound 2012 consensus panel recommendations. RadioGraphics 35, 2135–2148. https://doi.org/10.1148/rg.2015150092

[5] Mulkey S. B., du Plessis A. (2018). The critical role of the central autonomic nervous system in fetal-neonatal transition. Semin. Pediatr. Neurol. 28, 29–37. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.spen.2018.05.004

[6] Cerritelli F, Frasch MG, Antonelli MC, Viglione C, Vecchi S, Chiera M, Manzotti A. A Review on the Vagus Nerve and Autonomic Nervous System During Fetal Development: Searching for Critical Windows. Front Neurosci. 2021 Sep 20;15:721605. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnins.2021.721605

[7] De Jonckheere, J., Storme, L. NIPE is related to parasympathetic activity. Is it also related to comfort?. J Clin Monit Comput 33, 747–748 (2019). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10877-019-00276-1

[8] Weber A., Harrison T. M. (2019). Reducing toxic stress in the neonatal intensive care unit to improve infant outcomes. Nurs. Outlook 67, 169–189.
https://www.nursingoutlook.org/article/S0029-6554%2818%2930210-0/abstract

[9] Mulkey, S.B., du Plessis, A.J. Autonomic nervous system development and its impact on neuropsychiatric outcome. Pediatr Res 85, 120–126 (2019). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41390-018-0155-0










22/05/2025

Applications for our Small Grant funding close on 31 May but we're delighted to announce the first cab off the rank ...

A Mother's Retreat at Bribie Island Surf Club in early August. 🌊

Check out the details below and contact the organisers who are very passionate about creating a space for care and connection for mothers who lost a child to adoption. 😍

13/05/2025

Finding the truth hidden in our DNA can be life changing, but is it always worth knowing? Kumi Taguchi speaks with those who’ve made discoveries hidden in their DNA. Unpacking what DNA testing has meant for adoptees, and how some families are choosing between preventative genetic screening and lif...

09/05/2025

Last night, we held our first meeting for the new Sunshine Coast Adoption, Belonging and Connections Group at Sippy Downs. This is an open group for adults with experiences of adoption living on the Sunshine Coast. You're very welcome to join us for our next meeting in July. See flyer for details and how to RSVP. Hope to see you there!

16/04/2025

Updated post:

New preliminary findings from Dr Lynn Zubov’s research at Winston Salem University into adoption outcomes has revealed deeply sobering statistics:

• Adoptees may be 35x more likely to attempt su***de than non-adopted peers.
• First Mothers may be 600x more likely to die by su***de, and 37x more likely to attempt.

These numbers go far beyond the previously cited 4x risk and call for immediate awareness, compassion, and systemic change.

This global research includes UK adoptees and first mothers — and the outcomes indicated are devastating. For more information: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOjYluRYhzM

These preliminary findings will surely prompt important conversations, and although we absolutely recognise the need for peer-reviewed research and we’re committed to transparency and accuracy, we also know that when early trends show potential risk to life, waiting for publication can delay vital awareness and action.

📋 The study is still ongoing and you can still participate in the questionnaire that is now open.
https://wssuiar.co1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_094ibXoKNFxoH9c

You can also join the FB group associated with this research- https://www.facebook.com/share/15yxjvMb9U/?mibextid=wwXIfr

👉 For years, we've been holding space for these conversations with our dear friend and adoptee advocate, Zara Phillips. Visit our YouTube Library to watch our critical discussions with:
• Dr. Gabor Maté
• Dr. Paul Sunderland
• Zara Phillips

These talks explore trauma, relinquishment, and identity in ways that resonate more than ever.
Let’s not turn away from this.
Let’s continue the conversation.
🔗 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CW_GdFG1KY&t=10s

*In the context of adoption, "first mother" is a term used to acknowledge the biological mother's role in giving birth, while recognising the adoptive parents as the child's primary caregivers.

16/04/2025

🌍 Four years ago today something extraordinary happened.

We were honoured to host a global conversation between the world-renowned trauma expert Dr Gabor Maté and acclaimed author and adoptee advocate Zara Phillips, as they explored the deep, often invisible, trauma of relinquishment, adoption, and identity.

🧠💔 As rising data now shows alarming correlations between adoption and su***de, this conversation feels more important than ever. In a world that still struggles to acknowledge the complexity of adoption grief, this dialogue brought together hundreds of people from around the world, each carrying stories, searching for healing, and longing to feel understood.

And then came that moment…

“Life wanted you.” — Dr Gabor Maté

✨ A global sigh of relief. A collective pause. A powerful moment where so many felt truly seen.

Whether you're an adoptee, a parent, a professional, or simply someone who wants to better understand what lies beneath the surface of silence, this is a conversation to revisit, reflect on, and share.

🎥 The full event is freely available on YouTube: 🔗 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CW_GdFG1KY&t=62s

Let’s continue the conversation.

Let’s make space for truth, healing, and change.





This is a must see lecture about a study into the long term effects of adoption.
08/04/2025

This is a must see lecture about a study into the long term effects of adoption.

Lynn Zubov presents initial results from her study A Preliminary Exploration into Adoption and Reunions. Recorded Saturday, 5 April 2025.Details of the study...

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