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Alison Riddell Psychologist- Sydney, Sydney (2026)

20/11/2022

Moderate.

At this time of year I’ve noticed again that things have really picked up at my practice.

It’s not a surprise. It happens every year around the month of November.

It is a time that messages and emails flood in from people either wanting to engage in psychotherapy for the first time.

Or they are current clients in need of those extra sessions because the holiday period signifies a time of being with loved ones and family.

This can be stressful for those who have this in their lives and for those who do not.

And so, this is a personal share.

I have a history of struggling to say No, even when -
~ I am at capacity.
~ There are often not enough hours in the day.
~ My calendar is bursting.

‘Why do I do this?’ 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’ve come to realise that I have an empathy + compassion radar that goes into overdrive when clients are begging ‘Please can you fit me in?’ and the idea of letting them down overrides my own self-care.

It’s hard when you recognise that the two things you’ve considered a personal strength can actually work against you and set you up for burnout.

Or what Amy Cunningham refers to in this TED talk as - compassion fatigue.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZsaorjIo1Yc

Cunningham reminded me that whether we are an empathetic healthcare professional, carer to an ill parent or a well intentioned friend helping another, we can all run the risk of compassion fatigue.

And so I’ve been working on a better practice of saying ‘No’ when I need to - without feeling guilty. This is still a big ask, I’m not going to lie.

And so I’ve decided to put into practice what I encourage my clients to do.

Gift myself just 10 minutes a day to nourish myself with breath/silence/some form of movement. Swims throughout the year is are my favourite.

And, although it’s taken over 15 years to get here I must admit it feels good!

“𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒎𝒚𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒖𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒆𝒙𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒊𝒏 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒆, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒊𝒏 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓.”
- Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Image

06/09/2022

R U OK?

Australia will be encouraging and empowering people to meaningfully connect and lend support 🌕 🙏🏼 on September 8 2022.

I think this campaign has been a game changer in raising awareness for our mental health by inviting people to check in with one another & stay connected.

I wonder if we also need to think about how to respond when someone doesn’t subscribe to an ‘Yeah, I’m good’ and answer instead, ‘I’m not OK’.

As a psychologist I applaud that there has been a significant reduction in the stigma of seeking help (especially in male clients) and that government mental health initiatives -such as the national Medicare scheme offer rebates for up to 20 counselling sessions a calendar year- exist in our country.

That being said, I’ve begun wondering if at times the pendulum has swung too far to one side? Have we gone too far in medicalising normal emotions such as:
Anxiety 😦
Sadness 🥹
Fear 😱
Stress 😣

And if so, are we underplaying our inherent resilience in working through the complexities of being human 🤷🏻‍♀️

“ 𝑷𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒆𝒔𝒌𝒚 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒃𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒖𝒎𝒂𝒏… 𝒊𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒖𝒅𝒅𝒆𝒏 𝒉𝒖𝒓𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒄𝒂𝒏’𝒕 𝒃𝒆 𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒑𝒆𝒅. 𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝑰 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒂𝒍𝒔𝒐 𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒏, 𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒚, 𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒇𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒐𝒎 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈.”
⁃C.JoyBell.C

Image c/o Subtle Imagery (IG)

29/07/2022

Passion.

I love Dan Levy’s take on life!

From musings about:
~gender 🚻
~ love 🌈
~ inclusivity 🧕🏼
~being kind 🙏🏿
~ mental health 👌🏼

The only tweak I’d make to his quote here is that I believe anxiety can change.

It is fluid in it’s form, but constant in its presence.

And he’s right in inferring that it’s how we learn to manage our anxiety that is key.

Many of my patients are relieved to hear that anxiety is normal. It’s an emotion.

And anxiety incredible helpful in motivating us and driving us to be better.

Of course, it has a flip side 🆘 where anxiety can feel stressful, uncomfortable and panicky.

I really encourage patients to find their own bag of tricks.

Strategies they can pull out at any time to help calm them down. Take a moment.

I was having a ‘wobble’ earlier today and went outside to sit in the sun & take a few breaths. Soaking in that Vitamin D felt SO good 🔆

What’s the strategy that helps YOU the most?

24/05/2022

Shadows.

Have you ever said, thought or done something that you regret?

And afterwards you 🤷🏻‍♀️ wondered:
~ What just happened here?
~ What was that about?
~ Why did I say that?

If you’re curious and yes, brave enough to look at those parts of you that challenge your constructed idea of who you are, you might might see your shadow.

The ‘shadow self’ is a concept first coined by 20th century psychologist Carl Jung. He called it a moral problem that challenges aspects of our personality that we choose to reject and repress.

You know 🤔

The parts of ourselves that we don’t like—or that we think society won’t like.

Jung had this theory that we push those parts down into our unconscious. Bury them.

Most of us don’t want to acknowledge that these blind spots exist. 🙈 🙉

We tend to want to distance ourselves psychologically from thoughts & behaviours that are undesirable such as:
~ Jealousy.
~ Feeling superior or better than.
~ Having biases and prejudices.

Jung believed that it takes effort to become conscious of one’s shadow and then be ready to do the work.

I see this happen every day.

I find that patients find their way to my room when their way of being in the world no longer is working for them.

1) Some are invested in blame.

Or they may reject how their actions have played a part in a difficult situation. They might feel justified somehow? Or deny that they’ve played a role in it, because it would be too shameful to admit.

2) Some are invested in self-discovery & working with their shadows.

Therapy helps to:
~ Deepen an understanding of ourselves & explore what we co construct in our relationships.

Imagine what the world would be like if we acted as a collective? 🙏🏼

Food for thought… 💫

“𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒂𝒅𝒐𝒘.. 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒄𝒊𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝒊𝒕 𝒊𝒏𝒗𝒐𝒍𝒗𝒆𝒔 𝒓𝒆𝒄𝒐𝒈𝒏𝒊𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝒂𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚 𝒂𝒔 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍. 𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒂𝒄𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒂𝒍 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒅 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇-𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘𝒍𝒆𝒅𝒈𝒆.”
- Carl Jung

Image c/o Marthe Sobczak

09/03/2022

Honouring the female on ❤️

A morning of CONNECTING while
SUPPORTING .

Hosted by the eloquent and clever whose passion in working with women spans over a decade as a coach and mentor 🌹

05/03/2022

Communicate.

You know what is at the base of so many issues within our lives? Poor Communication.

I think some of us really struggle to listen and accept another person’s point of view when it differs from our own. 🙉

We can already be in our heads already formulating our response. 🧐

So, we are not really listening.

I can put my hand up for this absolutely. 💁🏻‍♀️

There are times I can feel defensive and if I don’t catch it, my response can be terse/thoughtless/ungrounded.

I remember finding inspiration during my early studies of Buddhism, which pointed me towards reading about ‘Right Speech.’

This an essential part of Buddha’s first teaching of the Noble Eightfold Path. 🙏🏼

The Buddha gave us 5 things to consider before speaking:
Is what we are doing to say:
TRUE?

HELPFUL?

SPOKEN WITH GOOD WILL & POSITIVE INTENTION FOR THE OTHER PERSON?

SAID WITH THE RIGHT TONE?

TIMELY? (Ask yourself is this the right time to be bringing this up?)

I really try to engage in life following these principles. And try to not feel like a bad person when my limbic system activates my ‘fight’ in my defence response. 😭

The best we can do is take responsibility where needed, keep a sense of humour and have an intention for WHO we want to BE in this life of ours. 🕊

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‘𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒏𝒐𝒏-𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓. 𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒓 𝒃𝒂𝒅𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒈𝒐𝒐𝒅𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔. 𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒊𝒕𝒚.’
- Buddha

13/01/2022

Laws of Attraction.

It’s totally understandable that people are feeling destabilised by the realisation that the COVID situation is not going away any time soon.

We’re told we have to learn to live with this.

And it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and even consumed by the way in which the media chooses to labour this point.

And while we do need to accept the truth of this, it’s important to not let these circumstances be the marker of our unhappiness.

We can choose to find things to feel happy with, regardless of what’s going on around us.

What I mean by that, is that’s it’s important to look at what you have in your life already - no matter how simple or small it might seem.

And it’s also important to take moments to acknowledge what these things are.

You could write it? ✍️
You could say it aloud? 🗣

I am grateful for ______
I am thankful for ______
I appreciate ______

I whole heartedly believe that having a daily practice of appreciation/acknowledging changes your state of mind and how you feel in your body.

It will generate more energy and inspiration to move more positively through your day.

And when we take some time to integrate our mind with our bodies we can create a sense of self-confidence, inner peace and wellbeing.

Doctor Joe Dispenza says it well -

“𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒂𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒖𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏, 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒖𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚.

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒌 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍 𝒄𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒂 𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒔𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒃𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈.

𝑨 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒃𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒔 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒅 & 𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓.

𝑺𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒃𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒖𝒊𝒏𝒆 𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒅-𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏.”

09/12/2021

Meaning.

What does it a good day feel like for you?

Is it what you did?
What you achieved?
What you finished?

Or is it about how you felt when you did any of these things?

I wonder what the pace of our lives would be like if we began brining a sense of presence to all the things we do?

It’s not to say ✋🏻 🛑 STOP
~ striving
~ doing
~ planning

No.

It’s just our days can be besieged by the list of things we need to do.

And it’s stressful!

And like our mental chatter, we need to find ways to slow down and find the space in 'between 🎼 the notes’ (not my quote - this is from French composer Claude Debussy).

If we can become more aware of these spaces in between tasks; in between our thoughts; we can soak in a moment or two and notice if this brings just a little more pleasure to our day.

Hmmmm…. 🧐🙏🏼✌🏼

23/11/2021

Move.

In a 🌎 that’s always rushing, how do we find ways in which to take a moment?

To pause❓

To reflect❓

How do we manage this❓

I feel fortunate to have begun a meditation practice many (many many 😉) years ago.

It began with a regular yoga 🧘🏻‍♀️ practice. This taught me how to:
~ breathe 💨 correctly
~ be IN my body
~ still my busy mind ☯️

Along the way teachers led me to:
~ A Buddhist chanting practice 🙏🏼
~ Sweat lodge purification ceremonies 🔥
~ Mindfulness training through MBSR (Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction) which allowed for a deepening of awareness and more capacity to be curious about the present moment- without judging or trying to change it.

It’s super hard to be in a difficult moment and not react. Try it sometime 🧐

Especially when we have a Mind that is wired to evaluate, label and analyse.

And while we’re chatting.. can we debunk talks of Mindfulness being ‘wooh wooh’ nonsense!

There’s enough scientific data now to support how meditation creates change in our body:
~ It thickens your pre frontal cortex increasing awareness, concentration & decision making.

~ It improves physical (irritable bowel, fibromyalgia) and mental (anxiety, depression, PTSD) conditions.

And BTW, Meditation and Mindfulness do not need to be sitting on a cushion with eyes 👀 closed chanting a mantra.

I’m fact, one of my favourite meditations is through movement.

Walking 👣
Exercising 🚵🏼‍♀️
Swimming 🏊‍♀️
Skiing 🎿
Yoga 🧘🏻‍♀️

Remember the 3Ms ✔️

Movement ➡️ Mindset ➡️ Mood

“𝑴𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒊𝒔 𝒐𝒇𝒕𝒆𝒏 𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒏 𝒐𝒇 𝒂𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝑩𝒖𝒅𝒅𝒉𝒊𝒔𝒕 𝒎𝒆𝒅𝒊𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏. 𝑰𝒕’𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝑩𝒖𝒅𝒅𝒉𝒊𝒔𝒎, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒑𝒂𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏. 𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒕’𝒔 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒆𝒅𝒊𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒊𝒔..”
-Jon Kabat Zinn

Image c/ Joakim Lloyd Raboff

19/10/2021

Support.

I’m contemplating the importance of being truly happy for others 🤔

You know, that really authentic moment of taking pleasure at their success.

It’s made me look to my friendships. Friends from a long, long time ago. And the ones I’ve been lucky enough to find along the way.

I look at the women in particular who surround me and notice there is a theme.

They embody the term Freudenfreude - the lovely enjoyment of another persons’s success.

(They are the opposite of Schadenfreude - the tendency to take pleasure in the misery of others).

They're happy to see others ✨shine. Genuinely.

And from where I sit, I’ve watched my girlfriends graduate moments to come through the other side, stronger and with the wisdom that only comes from adversity.

"Go girl" I say!

So, here is a toast the all the friends who embody Freudenfreude.
(now try saying this 3 times 🥴)

P.S.
By consciously practicing positive emotions such as gratitude & appreciation, we lead our brain’s inbuilt focus towards anxiety/fight&flight&freeze towards more positive emotions and thoughts! 🧘🏻‍♀️

And… exhale…😮‍💨

“𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒆𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆’𝒔 𝒆𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒔𝒖𝒏 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒐𝒏𝒆.”
-Tracee Ellis Ross

Image

10/09/2021

Hitting pause.

I’ve been taking some time off social media for a bit needing to take some time for myself to just be.
~ To read.
~ To cook.
~ To be with my family.
~ To exercise.
~ To spend time with myself.

Lockdown has forced me to re evaluate what’s important. My daughter asked me about the ‘olden days’ today which made me laugh.

I remembered a time of no mobile phones.

Landlines only. Friends rang or left a message on VM.

I remember writing and receiving more letters.

We only had 4 TV stations. No extra streaming channels like Netflix etc.

I seem to remember we were outside a lot. Sydney beaches were (and still are) pristine.
Ahh.. the quietude that was.

So, how can we cultivate more balance?

It takes intention, commitment and focus.

‘𝑰𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒎𝒊𝒅𝒔𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒐𝒔, 𝒌𝒆𝒆𝒑 𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒊𝒅𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖”
- Deepak Chopra

Image sourced Desktopofgraphy

16/07/2021

Joy.

An emotion that seems to slip past us quickly if we don’t stop to notice.

We’re wired to be on guard for threat. And there are so many reasons to feel worried. The NEWS thrives on that.

However, that being said today I’m choosing joy 💛

And here’s a photo that makes me smile ♥️

This week my beautiful client introduced me to an artist, Jane aka ‘Nightbirde’ who is joyful, even in the face of adversity.

Her recent audition on America’s Got Talent was incredibly moving. Her energy is pure.

“𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒄𝒂𝒏’𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒊𝒕 𝒖𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒍 𝒍𝒊𝒇𝒆 𝒊𝒔𝒏’𝒕 𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒅 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆, 𝒃𝒆𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒅𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒅𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒚.”
- Nightbirde

Alison Riddell Psychologist- Sydney

20/11/2022

06/09/2022

29/07/2022

24/05/2022

09/03/2022

05/03/2022

13/01/2022

09/12/2021

23/11/2021

19/10/2021

10/09/2021

16/07/2021

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