07/05/2026
I wrote this piece in Miami, caught between jetlag and sensory overload after spending a few days at Summit at Sea.
The sensory overload snuck up on me. I wasn’t sleeping well, had no routine, and my schedule left no room for quiet. With that, my inner critic got louder again, the same voice I’ve spent years learning to quiet.
Part of me felt sad to notice it return. It’s that specific disappointment you get when you thought you’d made more progress than this.
And another part of me recognised it immediately for what it was. Another loop. The spiral doing what the spiral does.
Since then, I’ve been thinking about a kind of grief that rarely comes up in recovery talks - the grief of truly accepting that this is what recovery looks like. It’s not a steady climb or a final destination. It’s a place you revisit over and over, each time with a bit more skill and a little less surprise.
Radical acceptance isn’t easy. It means letting go of the urge to fight your reality and just being present with it. But what comes after is worth it: less struggle, more compassion, and a clearer sense of what this journey really needs.
The spiral is real.
So is the sadness.
So is the ascent.
