http://redpillcounselling.com.au/

Red Pill Counselling, Sydney (2025)

11/09/2025

Today is an R U OK? Day.

It’s a reminder to slow down and really check in with the people around us. Sometimes, a simple “How are you?” is a way of showing someone that I see them and that they matter to me.

We rarely know what others are going through. Someone may look fine on the outside, smiling and working as usual, while inside they’re struggling with loneliness, anxiety, or grief. And often, one small question can open the door to a conversation that strengthens them to keep going.

In these moments, it’s not about finding the “right words” but about our presence, our care, and our willingness to listen.

So today I’d like to ask you: How are you, really? ❤️

18/10/2024

✨ Letting Go of Control ✨

Control can often make us anxious and disconnected. We think, “If I could control everything, I’d be happy.” But is that really true? 🤔

Life is unpredictable. The more we try to control, the more anxious we feel. Instead, try being present. Ask yourself, “What is happening now?” Notice your body, your surroundings, the people around you. 🌿

When we root ourselves in the present moment, fear and anxiety begin to dissolve. 🌼 Trust that you can handle whatever comes your way and embrace the unpredictability and beauty of life. 💖

Life is happening now—don’t miss it. ✨

18/10/2024

😊 On Letting Go of Control 😊

Today, let's talk about control - how it can ruin our lives and how we might stop trying to control everything. 💭 Have you ever felt overly controlling or anxious without even realising it? Maybe you fear people will judge you, or you're always on edge, or even when things seem fine, you still feel anxious. 😟

The truth is that life is unpredictable. 🌍 Control is an illusion. ✨ We think, “If only I could control my emotions, relationships, and work, then I'd be happy.” But is that really true? 🤔 By trying to control everything, we often create even more fear and anxiety. Imagine planning for a presentation—📊 the more we try to control, the more anxious we become, worrying that something might still go wrong. 😰

Control is a comforting illusion, but we feel even more vulnerable when it fails. When things go well, we think, “I did that because...” 😌 but when things go wrong, we blame ourselves. 😞 This cycle keeps us stuck, constantly trying to control more aspects of our lives. 🔄

Trying to control everything keeps us disconnected from the present. ⏳ We worry about future events, missing what's happening right now. ⛔️ What if we focused on being present instead of trying to control? 🧘‍♂️ Ask yourself, "What is happening now?" Notice your body, your surroundings, and the person in front of you. 🫶 The more you do this, the more you realise there's nothing you need to control in the present moment. 🌟

When we are present, fear and anxiety begin to dissolve. ✨ Fear is always about something that might happen, while anxiety is a projection into the future. In the present moment, there is nothing to fear—you are just here, experiencing what is. 🌼

Next time you feel anxious, pause and take a deep breath. 😮‍💨 Notice your body, surroundings, and the person you're talking to. Life is happening, and you are part of it—no need to constantly manage it. Letting go of control means trusting that you can handle whatever comes your way. 🙌 It means living fully and embracing the unpredictability and beauty of life. 🌸

Being present allows us to feel joy, connection, and peace. 😊 So, what if we let go of the need to control and root ourselves in the present moment? Life is happening now—don’t miss it. ✨💖

30/08/2024

What Should I Do?

When you ask, "What should I do?" in therapy, you may not be truly looking to solve your problem. Often, it's an attempt to find a quick fix, hoping for a solution that makes everything better without facing the deeper issues. It's a way to avoid the difficult work of looking inward and understanding your own mind.

We live in a world where quick fixes are highly valued, and many people prefer to patch the tyre and keep moving rather than take the time to figure out why it went flat in the first place. But here's the reality: this approach doesn't lead to lasting solutions. It's a surface-level way of engaging with life that can keep you from recognising the true source of your problems.

Asking, "What should I do?" can sometimes be a way to avoid making your own decisions. There's a natural fear of failure, mistakes, and the guilt that can come with them. When someone else tells you what to do, and it doesn't work out, placing the blame elsewhere is easier. It's a way to avoid the uncomfortable feelings of regret, inadequacy, and self-blame.

But this isn't just avoidance; it can also be self-sabotage. By steering clear of the unknown parts of your personality, you might be choosing comfort over growth. This can keep you from fully tapping into your potential and understanding your true self.

Suppose you want to break free from this cycle. In that case, it's important to shift the focus from asking, "What should I do?" to questions like, "How can I understand this better?" or "What's driving my behaviour?" These questions encourage you to explore your inner world and face the truths you may have avoided.

True growth doesn't come from external solutions. It comes from connecting with your inner self and exploring your emotions, thoughts, and motivations with honesty and courage. It's about listening to your intuition and trusting that the answers you seek are already within you. Only then can you move beyond dependency and take full ownership of your life.

Are you ready to stop being a spectator in your own life? It's time to start facing yourself.

09/08/2024

Day 30. Finish!

🤩Today's task is to imagine your place of power, your personal sanctuary where you can recharge just by closing your eyes. Practice immersing yourself in this mental picture to enrich your sensory experience, returning rested, calm, and filled with light.

Visualise it vividly. What is this place? What does it look like? What sounds are heard there? What aromas fill the air? Why do you feel good there? Everything feels real—even if it never was. Use this ability when reality feels like a grey, rainy day to escape.

Don’t compare this mental image with real life. Your present is fine as it is—sometimes simple, sometimes boring, but never wrong.

08/08/2024

Day 29

🌚 Some problems in our lives linger for years despite our claims of trying to solve them. Often, it's not external circumstances holding us back but internal resistance because the problem provides hidden benefits. These benefits are so valuable to us that we find it difficult to let go.

We'll continue to struggle until we understand why we're holding on to these problems. We might say we want to solve the problem (lose weight, fall in love, change jobs, move out from our parents, get married, have children, etc.), but in reality, we fear losing the hidden advantages it brings, such as steering clear of vulnerability, staying in our comfort zone, or evading responsibility.

Exercise for exploring hidden benefits:

1. Clearly formulate your problem: For example, "I can't get into a romantic relationship."Run It through the filter: Consider what you might gain from holding onto this problem. Are you sidestepping the fear of change, failure, or success? Perhaps you are maintaining control, shunning rejection, or preserving your identity.
2. Reflect on these benefits and see which ones resonate with you. Are you circumventing pain, seeking attention, or gaining sympathy? Maybe you're skirting conflict or preserving relationships. Fear of the unknown and bypassing expectations might also be at play.

By understanding these hidden benefits, you can gain insight into why you might be holding onto your problem and take steps to address the underlying fears and resistances. This list is not exhaustive, but it can provide important personal insights. As you go through each potential benefit, pay attention to the one that resonates with a clear "Yes, here it is, exactly!"

07/08/2024

Day 28

🧐 Today is a very easy task - Reverse daily reflection.
Recall your day from the end to the beginning. What was good? Completed tasks? Personal achievement? Lesson learned?

06/08/2024

Day 27

🌏 When you perform any action, your mind often wanders. Living in the present moment is extremely difficult, but that's your task today! How to do it? Observe everything around you carefully. This will help you open up to the world instead of seeking refuge in yourself.

Today's challenge is to maintain constant focus on your actions. For example, if you're having lunch, don't eat mechanically. Watch what you put in your mouth, notice how the dish is prepared, and taste it. When brushing your teeth, feel the friction of the brush. Wherever you are, notice the smallest details: colours, lines, shapes, and how people communicate.

Open your eyes wide and train your powers of observation! This exercise will keep you grounded in the present and help develop your prefrontal cortex, enhancing your thinking skills.

05/08/2024

Day 26

🔭 This trial will test your thinking abilities but will open new horizons for you. Is there someone you know that you don’t like? Good. Try to accept their point of view. See things from their eyes and, more importantly, do it without judgment. Understanding the perspective of someone completely "unlike" you is incredibly challenging. However, once you complete this task, you'll see the world from a perspective that will amaze you.

04/08/2024

Day 25

🧙‍♂️ Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo. Today's challenge is to explore the "magic" question. Imagine you go to bed tonight, and while you are sleeping, a miracle happens. This miracle solves all your problems and brings you the life you desire. However, since you were asleep, you don't know that the miracle has happened.

When you wake up, what would be the first signs that this miracle occurred?

What would you notice is different?
How would you feel?
What would others notice about you?
How would your daily routine change?
Take a moment to vividly imagine these changes. Write down the details of your new reality. This exercise helps you to clarify your goals and recognise the small steps you can take today to move towards a better tomorrow.

Reflect on the emotions and insights that arise. How can you start making these changes a reality in your everyday life? Even small steps can lead to significant improvements. Embrace the possibility of transformation and take action to create the life you envision.

03/08/2024

Day 24

📵Spend an entire day without using the internet or social media. Use your smartphone only for essential communication. Often, we get so caught up in scrolling that we miss out on precious moments of peace. The goal isn't to give up your smartphone entirely, just refrain from constantly checking it during pauses in your day. This digital detox will help you cultivate inner peace and enjoy moments of inactivity, allowing you to stay serene with your thoughts.

02/08/2024

Day 23

🖌Today's challenge is to turn the heavy burden of emotional baggage into something light. Think of an oppressive emotion and use your imagination to answer these questions:

If it had a shape, what would it be?
If it had a colour, what shade would it be?
If it had dimensions, what would they be?
If it had a temperature, would it be hot or cold?
Once you've visualised the emotion, imagine an instrument that can compress it into a small ball, no bigger than a billiard ball. Then, throw this ball as far as possible, letting it roll into a bottomless abyss, like the crater of a volcano.

Pay attention to all the emotions that arise and focus especially on the relief you feel at the end.

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11/09/2025

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