Perfectly Imperfect

Perfectly Imperfect Contact information, map and directions, contact form, opening hours, services, ratings, photos, videos and announcements from Perfectly Imperfect, Mental Health Service, Level 1, Botany Road, Mascot, 2020, Sydney.

Perfectly Imperfect is an Australia-wide NDIS registered neurodiversity affirming and gender affirming service providing counselling, advocacy, neurodiversity affirming behaviour support, inclusive education support and disabilitity advocacy

14/12/2025

Today, Bondi beach - a place of joy, sunshine, family, community and australian spirit was shattered by a horrific antisemitic act of violence.

Lives were lost. Families and a community are grieving. A place that should represent safety, connection, and everyday joy became a site of fear and trauma.

This isn’t about politics or sides. It’s about acknowledging harm, holding space for grief, and saying clearly: no one should ever be targeted for who they are.

To those impacted particularly within the Jewish community your pain is real, your fear is valid, and you should never have to justify your right to feel safe.

Today, we grieve. We honour the lives lost and the helpers who ran toward danger. And we stand against the normalisation of hate in any form.

If this has shaken you and you need support, help is available in Australia:
• Lifeline: 13 11 14 (24/7)
• Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636
• Su***de Call Back Service: 1300 659 467
• Kids Helpline (ages 5–25): 1800 55 1800
• MensLine Australia: 1300 78 99 78

09/12/2025

We Don’t Have a Bullying Problem. We Have a Social Safety Problem.

Schools keep rolling out anti-bullying campaigns built on posters, assemblies, and behaviour contracts.
But the data is clear: they don’t work.
And neurodivergent kids are the ones who pay for those failures.

A groundbreaking Israeli program changed the entire conversation: not with punishment, but with neuroscience.

The Study That Reframes Everything

In 2022, the Israeli Ministry of Education piloted a 15-minute class called Social Micro-Navigation across 146 schools.

Drawing on research from Tel Aviv University (Ben-Ari & Hirshberg, 2020), the program taught children how to:
• recognise basic facial expressions
• use simple I-statements
• choose between “ignore / pause / request help”
• practise 2-minute low-pressure social role-plays

The results in three months:
• 61% reduction in bullying
• 54% reduction in hidden aggression
• 43% reduction in impulsive aggression

Why?
Because misread social cues not “bad behaviour” are the root cause of most school conflict.

Especially for autistic, ADHD, PDA and trauma-impacted kids who live with heightened threat perception.

What This Means for Inclusion:

When children learn to read cues accurately and choose predictable responses, the entire school climate shifts.
Bullying goes down.
Aggression goes down.
Escalation goes down.
Misinterpretation goes down.
Shame-based discipline becomes unnecessary.

This is real inclusion not the performative kind.

How Perfectly Imperfect Is Bringing This to Australian Schools

We’re not waiting for systems to catch up.

1. We’ve built a full Social Safety & Micro-Navigation module into our “Belonging Is for Everyone” program adapted for autistic, ADHD, PDA and trauma-impacted students.

2. We’re training teachers in the neuroscience of threat perception, co-regulation, and conflict prevention.

3. We’re working directly with school leadership teams to replace punitive behaviour policies with safety-based frameworks.

4. We’re equipping parents with scripts, evidence and advocacy tools to demand these practices.

5. We’re pushing for systemic adoption so Social Micro-Navigation becomes standard wellbeing education in Australia.

The research exists.
The tools exist.
The outcomes speak for themselves.

It’s time to shift from managing behaviour to teaching social safety.

Perfectly Imperfect will keep advocating until every school does exactly that.

08/12/2025

We Can Advocate for Kids All Day Long But Nothing Will Change Until We Start Supporting the People on the Coalface.

There’s a narrative in the education world that I am determined to disrupt, loudly and fiercely:

That parents and teachers are on opposite sides.
That advocating for neurodivergent kids means criticising schools. That systemic change requires calling out educators individually.

It’s the biggest false dichotomy we’ve ever created.
And it’s hurting everyone.

Our education system is not failing our childre because teachers don’t care.

It’s failing because we keep asking teachers to do the impossible with the invisible resources of straight-up magic.

I advocate fiercely for neurodivergent students and their families, you know that’s my whole brand.
I challenge poor practice.
I push back on outdated behaviourism.
I call out exclusion and compliance culture.

But I will never blame an individual teacher for the outcome of a system that chronically undertrains, undersupports, overwhelms, and underfunds them.

Teachers are not the problem. They’re the frontline.
And the frontline is where systems collapse first.

Every day I see educators who desperately want to do better but don’t have:
• training in neurodiversity
• trauma-informed practice
• PDA and demand avoidance strategies
• sensory system understanding
• behaviour-as-communication frameworks
• co-regulation literacy
• time
• staffing
• support
• mentorship
• the emotional bandwidth required to meet 28 unique nervous systems in one room

And yet the expectation is:
“Just manage it.”

Manage dysregulation.
Manage learning needs.
Manage anxiety.
Manage panic.
Manage masking.
Manage sensory overload.
Manage environments that were never designed for neurodivergent brains.

All without the training or the tools.

Teachers are burning out.
Parents are burning out.
Kids are burning out.

And everyone is pointing fingers in circles while the system quietly avoids accountability.

Let’s name what’s actually happening:

**We are asking educators to deliver neuro-affirming, trauma-informed, inclusive practice…

without giving them the training, supervision, safety, or resourcing required to do it.**

That’s not a professional failure.
That’s a structural one.

If we truly want:
• fewer suspensions
• fewer exclusions
• fewer “behaviour incidents”
• fewer traumatised students
• fewer burnt-out teachers
• better academic outcomes
• more regulated classrooms
• stronger relationships

Then we need to stop treating professional learning like optional professional “development”
and start treating it like emergency infrastructure. Because the coalface workers: teachers, SLSOs, aides, learning support staff are doing the best they can with what they’ve been given.

And what they’ve been given is simply not enough.

The system is resting on good intentions instead of proper training.
On exhaustion instead of understanding.
On compliance policies instead of nervous system literacy.
On hope instead of strategy.

And then it blames the outcome on individual behaviour of teachers, parents or children.

You cannot expect magic from a profession running on empty. If we want better for our kids, we must give better to our teachers.

Educators aren’t enemies - we’re on the same team, fighting the same broken structure.

And until the system stops collapsing onto the people who hold it up,
kids will continue to fall through the cracks no matter how hard we advocate.

Today my son did something that stopped me in my tracks.He chose to build a bear - not for himself, not for comfort, no...
06/12/2025

Today my son did something that stopped me in my tracks.
He chose to build a bear - not for himself, not for comfort, not because it was cute…
…but to give to his principal as a goodbye gift to his principal before heading off to high school.

And not just any bear.
A bear with a recorded personal message inside it.
A message he planned, rehearsed, and proudly recorded because this principal saw him, supported him, championed him, and made school a place he could actually breathe.

For a neurodivergent kid with PDA traits, AuDHD wiring, and a history of school trauma, this isn’t “cute.”
It’s monumental.

Because when an educator gets it right, our kids remember.
Not for a term.
Not for a year.
For life.

And here’s the part no one tells you:

The legacy goes both ways.
Yes - educators shape our children.
But our children shape them right back.

My son challenged systems.
He pushed for better practice.
He forced conversations that needed to happen.
He taught adults how to slow down, listen, regulate themselves, and rethink what “support” actually looks like.

And this principal didn’t run from it.
She rose to it.

So today, a little boy gave a bear with his heart stitched into its seams.
And an educator received something every great educator knows matters more than awards, policies or performance reviews:

Proof that she made a difference.

To every teacher, principal, SLSO and educator who chooses compassion over compliance: this is your legacy.

Our kids feel it.
We feel it.
And trust me…
you’re changing far more than you realise.

Today my son did something that stopped me in my tracks.He chose to build a bear - not for himself, not for comfort, not...
06/12/2025

Today my son did something that stopped me in my tracks.
He chose to build a bear - not for himself, not for comfort, not because it was cute…
…but to give to his principal as a goodbye gift, before he makes his way to high school.

And not just any bear.
A bear with a recorded personal message inside it.
A message he planned, rehearsed, and proudly recorded because this principal saw him, supported him, championed him, and made school a place he could actually breathe.

For a neurodivergent kid with PDA traits, AuDHD wiring, and a history of school trauma, this isn’t “cute.”
It’s monumental.

Because when an educator gets it right, our kids remember.
Not for a term.
Not for a year.
For life.

And here’s the part no one tells you:

The legacy goes both ways.
Yes - educators shape our children.
But our children shape them right back.

My son challenged systems.
He pushed for better practice.
He forced conversations that needed to happen.
He taught adults how to slow down, listen, regulate themselves, and rethink what “support” actually looks like.

And this principal didn’t run from it.
She rose to it.

So today, a boy gave a bear with his heart stitched into its seams.
And an educator will receive something every great educator knows matters more than awards, policies or performance reviews:

Proof that she made a difference.

To every teacher, principal, SLSO and educator who chooses compassion over compliance: this is your legacy.

Our kids feel it.
We feel it.
And trust me…
you’re changing far more than you realise.

When you run into ex-clients who are using the skills you caught them to change other peoples lives! So incredibly proud...
06/12/2025

When you run into ex-clients who are using the skills you caught them to change other peoples lives! So incredibly proud of you!

When you run into ex-clients who changed their lives and then teaching others the same skills!
06/12/2025

When you run into ex-clients who changed their lives and then teaching others the same skills!

05/12/2025

We need to talk about the “professionals” who are still confusing compliance with support.

Every week, families walk into my practice carrying the weight of systems that told them their neurodivergent child is “fine at school” but “exploding at home.”

And every week, I say the same thing:

If a child can only cope in an environment by masking, suppressing, shrinking, and contorting themselves… that is not success. That’s survival.

And survival always has a cost.
It shows up later as meltdowns, shutdowns, burnout, school can’t, depression, anxiety, and a shattered sense of self.

But here’s the part people don’t like to talk about:

It’s not “behaviour.” It’s the environment.
And when the environment refuses to change, the child pays the price.

I’ve spent nearly 20 years in this field, and I can tell you with absolute certainty:
• A calm child isn’t necessarily a regulated child.
• A compliant child isn’t a supported child.
• A quiet child isn’t a thriving child.

If the only reason a child isn’t falling apart in your classroom, clinic, or home is because they’ve learned to abandon their own needs to avoid punishment, shame, or disappointment…

That’s not behaviour support.
That’s trauma.

And we need to stop applauding it.

Neurodivergent kids don’t need tougher discipline.
They don’t need sticker charts, planned ignoring, or “earning” co-regulation.

They need safety.
They need attunement.
They need adults who know the difference between a meltdown and a power struggle.
They need environments that bend with them, not break them.

And here’s the good news:

When you change the environment, kids stop needing to fall apart.

When you understand their brain, their needs, their sensory world, their lagging skills: everything shifts.

It’s not magic.
It’s not softness.
It’s not permissiveness.

It’s science.
It’s lived experience.
It’s basic human dignity.

If we want neurodivergent children to thrive, we need systems that stop demanding compliance and start prioritising connection.

And honestly?
It shouldn’t take a meltdown, a complaint, or a “crisis meeting” to get there.

But until schools and services catch up, we’ll keep doing what we do best here at Perfectly Imperfect - teaching families, educators, and practitioners how to create environments where neurodivergent kids can finally breathe.

Because the goal was never “good behaviour.”
The goal is a child who doesn’t have to choose between being themselves and being safe.

03/12/2025

When Parents Have to Fight for Basic Respect… and Still Walk Out Grateful

Today’s meeting with the school after my complaint was lodged ended on a positive note and I want to acknowledge that.

We received acceptance.
We received apologies.
We received a commitment to do better, to reflect, to repair, and to rebuild trust.

And that matters.
Truly.
Being heard matters.

But here’s the bigger truth: parents of neurodivergent kids should not have to lodge formal complaints just to receive the respect, privacy, and professionalism that should’ve been there from the start.

We shouldn’t have to advocate this hard.
We shouldn’t have to escalate.
We shouldn’t have to put our trauma on display to prove a point.
We shouldn’t have to be “that parent” to be taken seriously.

Yes, I’m relieved.
Yes, I’m glad accountability was taken.
Yes, I’m grateful it didn’t turn into another battle.

But i want to be brutally honest:
Positive outcomes don’t erase the emotional cost it takes to get there.

Parents are exhausted from being dismissed before they’re heard.
We’re tired of systems that only move when pushed.
And we’re over the idea that advocating for our kids is somehow an inconvenience.

Today was a win but it was a win that came with unnecessary labour, triggering of PTSD and anxiety.

And that’s the point.

Here’s to a future where schools start with curiosity, respect, and safety not defensiveness.
Where inclusion isn’t reactive, but embedded.
Where neurodivergent kids and their families don’t have to jump through fire to get the basics.

Today gave me hope.
But it also reminded me why this work matters so damn much.

— Jess Dolev
Neurodivergent. Parent. Advocate. And absolutely done with systems that only listen after the damage is done.

28/11/2025

When Schools Respond to Accountability With a Phone Call… No. Not on my watch!

Yesterday I raised a serious concern with my son’s future school - a privacy breach, harmful commentary made publicly about my neurodivergent child, and an absolutely inappropriate dismissal of his needs.
Nothing ambiguous. Nothing “minor.” A clear ethical issue.

And what happened next?

The deputy principal called me for a “chat.”

Here’s the thing:
When a parent raises a legitimate concern about privacy, professionalism, or discrimination, a phone call is not a “chat.”
It’s an attempt to:
• control the narrative
• minimise the issue
• avoid written accountability
• and often, to gently-but-firmly push the parent back into silence

And I don’t play that game anymore because too many parents have been burned by it - me included!!

So I responded in writing:

This matter will not be discussed over the phone.
Given the seriousness of the breach, all communication will remain in writing or in minuted meetings for transparency, accuracy, and accountability.

That was it. Clear, calm, boundaried.

This is advocacy.

Advocacy isn’t yelling.
It isn’t begging.
It isn’t performing gratitude for scraps of inclusion.

Advocacy is:
• knowing your rights
• recognising power imbalances
• refusing to be redirected into private conversations where records disappear
• keeping everything in writing so there is a transparent paper trail
• drawing a line when professionals cross one

And I share this because parents of neurodivergent kids deal with this constantly:

We raise a concern → the system tries to move it off email → the issue “magically” evaporates → the parent ends up labelled as emotional, difficult, or overreacting.

No.
Not anymore.
Not here.
Not on my watch.

If you’re reading this and you’ve been made to feel like your child’s safety, dignity, privacy, or right to inclusion is a “chat,” please hear me:

You’re not the problem.
The system’s avoidance is.
And you’re allowed to insist on accountability.

- Jess xx

BLACK FRIDAY OFFER YOU DIDN'T SEE COMING!If your home has been feeling like everyone’s nervous system is hanging on by a...
27/11/2025

BLACK FRIDAY OFFER YOU DIDN'T SEE COMING!

If your home has been feeling like everyone’s nervous system is hanging on by a thread, this is your sign! The chaos era is officially over.

Tonight I’m opening early-bird access to my Black Friday bundle:

The “We’re Done With Chaos” Pack 
The only parenting + ND/NT couples program designed to bring CALM, CONNECTION and actual CHANGE to your family, without behaviourism, shame or burnout.

For the first time ever, you can grab BOTH full 6-week programs for:
$997 (normally $1,500)
or grab either program individually for $600 (normally $750).
And yes, this is the biggest discount I’ve ever offered.

If you’re exhausted, overstimulated, overwhelmed and doing your best with zero roadmap, this bundle gives you:
- The scripts
- The templates
- The regulation tools
- The communication strategies
- The advocacy foundations
- The relationship supports
…everything you were never taught but desperately needed.

No more guessing.
No more googling.
No more feeling like you’re failing.

This is your clear, grounded, neurodiversity-affirming path forward.

Early Bird Starts NOW.
Offer ends Monday at midnight AEDT.

Tap the link in bio to join
Or DM me “CHAOS” and I’ll send it straight to you

Your family deserves this level of calm.
And so do you!

27/11/2025

When a School Breaks Trust Before Term Even Begins

Today, I experienced something that too many parents of neurodivergent children will recognise instantly: the moment a school publicly discusses your child’s behaviour without your consent, without context, and without any understanding of the impact.

At a high-school orientation, a staff member chose to share a story about my child’s behaviour - in front of a room full of parents and students I had never met. No warning. No permission. No regard for privacy, dignity, or the complex history that so many neurodivergent families carry into school spaces.

I sat there stunned. Because this wasn’t just a careless comment. It was a breach of trust before the school year even begins.

And then came the second blow: a dismissive remark about my child’s needs regarding school camp. A quip that belittled the genuine supports he requires, trivialised our past school trauma, and revealed a deep lack of understanding of what inclusion actually means in practice.

This is not an isolated experience. This is the system.

Parents of neurodivergent kids spend years navigating environments where their children’s stories are told about them, not with them. Where professionals feel entitled to share private information publicly. Where needs are minimised, empathy is optional, and “inclusion” is treated like a slogan rather than a commitment.

And yet we keep showing up. We keep advocating. We keep trying to work collaboratively with educators, hoping this time will be different — hoping this time our children will be seen, understood, protected.

But trust is not built when our children are spoken about rather than respected.
Trust is not built when trauma is dismissed as overreaction.
Trust is not built when inclusion is selectively applied.

What happened this week is exactly why so many parents brace themselves every time they walk through school gates. It’s why families burn out. It’s why school disengagement happens long before any “behaviour” surfaces.

Because when you’ve lived through harm, you can recognise the warning signs immediately.

I’m sharing this publicly not to shame a school, but to highlight a pattern that is still deeply embedded in the education system. A pattern where neurodivergent students are discussed rather than consulted, judged rather than supported, and spoken about in rooms where they have no voice.

We can do better. We must do better.

And it starts with something very simple:
Respect a child’s story.
Seek consent.
Hold their dignity.
Avoid careless commentary that reinforces trauma.
And remember that parents are not the enemy - they are your greatest partners, if you let them be.

Trust is fragile. Once broken, it takes real work to rebuild.
And families like mine are long overdue for an education system willing to do that work.

Address

Level 1, Botany Road, Mascot, 2020
Sydney, NSW
1141

Opening Hours

Monday 9am - 8pm
Wednesday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Thursday 9am - 8pm

Telephone

0407 022 216

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Since 2006, we have worked with children, teenagers and adults to provide empathetic counselling and accurate assessments to assist with a range of common life problems and events.

Whether you need assistance with depression, anxiety, trauma, court events or disability needs, we strive to be flexible to meet you and your family’s needs.

Sydney Allied Health Family Practice is based in Maroubra in the Eastern Suburbs of Sydney. We also provide home visits!