01/02/2022
Seems fitting as the Portal opens up today with the significant date of 2/02/2022 to post this
3 years ago I lost “The” most significant person in my life, my mum, then not long after Dad passed
Nothing prepares you for Death
No one can express in that moment the emotions they feel, the connection that is slipping and the overwhelming sense of grief that completely encompasses you!
My mums side of the family were creative.
Writers, Poets, Singers and Painters.
My grandparents did amazing bark art, and beautiful charcoal pencilling
But of all the creativity….
I loved the writing
Personally I love writing letters and poems, as did mum and my grandmother
My grandmother wrote my grandfather as did he - her, when he was deployed overseas in the Army through the War
“Love Letters” never read or shared with anyone (how romantic) bags full, 100’s of beautiful letters
I fondly remember my grandfathers drawings and my grandmothers hand writing on the envelopes
Anyways, it got me thinking.
When Mum was in her final stages in hospital, I had this overwhelming need to share a part of my story from that week in hospital
It is a story of unconditional love, care, support, frustration, laughter, family and grief!
I started writing, very soon after mum passed as I wanted my thoughts to be vivid, honest and true to that moment.
Here is a brief excerpt of what I’ve started and in time I’ll create a piece for my family to hold onto, and to share a very personal but beautiful journey into transitioning a loved one. That may, bring comfort, shed light, open up a conversation or just be reflective for others to read.
( Chapter 1)
“Where are you?” I’ve just parked the car, I’m grabbing a gift for Lucy ( the nurse)
“You need to come now, I think this is it”
( to the salesperson) I’m terribly sorry you’ll have to hold onto that, Ive got to go.
I raced out of that store, like Id robbed a bank
It was drizzling with rain, no umbrella, my thongs were not the ideal shoe to wear in the weather and needing to get to The Private from Kogarah Main Street in record time.
I stopped, took them off and ran bare footed
I knew what the phone call meant
I was having conversations with myself in my head
“Just run, mum hang on, please mum wait, just run, don’t go, it’s ok, run faster, don’t cry, breathe, run, please wait”
I was getting myself worked up.
Thinking of all the scenarios, to get to the room
The lifts
The corridor
What if I miss not saying goodbye
My sisters
The feeling of losing mum
I busted out of the lifts, ran down to room 241A
opened the door and there you were.
Waiting!
Something most people do with us Mossie girls! ( mind you progressively got worse with each sibling)
Come here Sim ❤️
By no means a formality, I took my place around the bed
It was in that moment, I realised just how fragile life was and it cemented within every fibre of my being how I was going to Love
I mean really love, my life from that day on!
💗🌸💗🌸💗🌸💗🌸💗🌸💗
Life is so precious, memories are all we have, we take absolutely NOTHING with us.
Grab the moments, love hard, laugh harder, be the best person you can be, extend kindness and wrap your loved ones up.
