02/12/2025
🎄✨ “Be the Calm in Their Christmas Wreath”
Using the "STOP "Method to Help Kids Through the Silly Season
As the Christmas rush hits full speed, many families feel the familiar December swirl with concerts, parties, costumes, school assemblies, late nights, sugar highs, travel plans, and a whole lot of overstimulated little humans.
In the middle of all that chaos, we can be like our friend Dilly:
soft blue, peaceful, eyes closed, holding something precious, sitting calmly inside a wreath full of pine needles, berries, and colour.
Everything around it is busy.
But she is still.
And that is exactly the reminder children, and their grown-ups, need during the silly season.
The Season of Big Feelings (For Kids and Parents)
December is magical… but also exhausting. Routines disappear, expectations skyrocket, sensory overload increases, and tired kids often end up with bigger feelings than their bodies can manage.
That’s where we, as parents, get to be the calm centre — the steady presence inside the wreath.
One of the simplest and most effective tools for this time of year is the STOP method:
S – Stop
T – Think
O – Observe
P – Proceed
It’s a gentle framework that helps kids pause before reacting, and helps parents respond instead of getting swept up in the chaos.
Let’s walk through how you can use it in your home.
S – Stop: Hit the Pause Button Together
Just like the peaceful creature in the picture, stopping gives children a moment to settle their nervous system.
For parents:
Get down to their eye level
Use a soft voice
Say, “Let’s freeze for a moment like Christmas statues.”
For kids:
One deep breath
A hand on their belly or heart
A moment to “reset”
Stopping interrupts the meltdown spiral before it fully begins.
T – Think: Help Them Notice What’s Happening
Kids often react before they understand what they’re feeling.
Thinking helps them connect the dots.
Try questions like:
“What were you hoping would happen?”
“What’s the part that feels hard right now?”
“What would help your body feel safer or calmer?”
This teaches problem-solving instead of punishment.
O – Observe: Help Them Name the Feeling
Observation is where emotional intelligence grows.
You can guide them by saying:
“I notice your hands are tight — are you feeling frustrated?”
“Your face looks sad, sweetie. Is that right?”
“Your body looks tired — do you need a break?”
Kids learn to regulate after they learn to recognise.
You’re helping them build that skill.
P – Proceed: Choosing the Next Best Step
Now that you’ve paused, thought, and observed, you can gently move forward.
Some child-friendly options:
“Should we take a break together?”
“Do you want a cuddle or some space?”
“Would a drink of water help your body calm down?”
“Let’s make a plan for the next five minutes.”
Proceeding doesn’t mean pushing — it means guiding.
When the Silly Season Gets Extra Silly…
Children often show “spicy behaviours” this time of year:
bossiness, tears, clinginess, arguing, saying mean things they don’t mean.
None of it is because they’re naughty.
It’s because their little nervous systems are overwhelmed.
Using STOP helps you stay calm enough to meet the need underneath the behaviour:
“Help me feel safe.”
“Help me slow down.”
“Help me make sense of this feeling.”
When we respond to the need, the behaviour nearly always softens.
You Are the Calm in Their Christmas Wreath
Like the little creature at the centre of the wreath, children look to you to learn how to settle themselves.
You don’t need perfection.
You don’t need endless patience.
You just need moments — tiny, intentional pauses where you STOP, breathe, and help your child come back to centre.
In the middle of busy December, you can be their safe anchor.
Their still point.
Their calm wreath centre.
And that, more than any present under the tree, is the true magic of this season.
