Hugo Jorge: Individual and Couples Counsellor & Clinical Supervisor

20/12/2025

Christmas, from a psychological perspective, acts as an emotional amplifier.

Pre-existing emotions—loneliness, grief, frustration, a desire for belonging, or a need for recognition—tend to intensify. This time of year activates old emotional memories, often linked to early attachment experiences, making current reactions more intense than the present context would justify.

Family gatherings can reactivate old roles and survival strategies learned throughout life. Some people respond by trying to control the environment, please others, or maintain harmony at all costs. Others withdraw emotionally, become more irritable, or seek distractions to avoid inner discomfort. These movements are not character flaws, but attempts at self-protection in the face of difficult emotions.

Social pressure to "be okay" at Christmas can lead to emotional suppression and feelings of inadequacy when the inner experience does not match external expectations. Creating space to acknowledge what one truly feels is an essential step in reducing suffering and increasing emotional regulation.

Christmas can become a time of greater inner presence, curiosity, and self-compassion. It's not always possible to change external or family contexts, but it is possible to develop inner security, make choices more aligned with one's own limits, and redefine what connection means. From this place, relationships and decisions tend to become more conscious and sustainable.

19/12/2025

18/12/2025

A study published on PubMed suggests that men often experience improved sleep quality when sleeping beside a romantic partner rather than alone, an effect linked to increased oxytocin, enhanced emotional security, and reduced stress responses. Oxytocin, in particular, plays a role in relaxation and sleep-related neuroendocrine regulation, supporting the idea that social closeness can positively influence sleep outcomes.

18/12/2025

Today's insight, for you...

17/12/2025

While the pain of the victims and their loved ones is felt close to the community, wider Australia has been grieving, shaken by this news.

Crisis support hotline Lifeline experienced its busiest day of the year after the attack, and it expects numbers of people accessing its service to jump.

Repeated exposure to this kind of footage can contribute to vicarious trauma or feelings of loss and sadness — which can be difficult to unpack.

The more relatable an incident is, the more upsetting it can be.

The images and descriptions of the Bondi Beach shooting attack are confronting, and having an emotional reaction is normal, experts say.

15/12/2025

During Chanukah, Jewish families traditionally light candles and place them in windows, a public declaration of faith symbolizing light overcoming darkness. After yesterday's tragic Bondi shooting, many Australian Jewish families are shaken, unsure if it's safe to practice this tradition. Tonight, our family joined Australians of all backgrounds in lighting a candle, a show of unity, remembrance, and hope. The attack targeted Jewish Australians, reminding us that an attack on one is an attack on all. We stand together in grief, defiance of hate, and in finding light in darkness.

15/12/2025

When there's a tragedy - when evil is unleashed on the world - people often share the quote ascribed to Fred Rogers that we should "look for the helpers".

If your kids are struggling to comprehend this incomprehensible massacre on our shores, here are some helpers you can point to:

1. The hero who tackled and disarmed one of the gunmen.

Ahmed al-Ahmed, a 43-year-old father of two, was just passing by when he heard the shooting. With no fi****ms or self-defence training, he charged one of the gunmen from behind, wrestled the rifle away, and pointed it back at the attacker - forcing him to retreat.

Ahmed was shot twice in the struggle and is recovering in hospital. Countless people are alive because he didn't hesitate. I find myself in tears just thinking about what he did. Heroism is not a big enough word for me here.

2. The police and ambos who risked their lives and gave all they had to protect and preserve life.

Emergency responders flooded the scene, literally putting themselves in the firing line.

Two police officers were shot while protecting the community and are currently in serious but stable condition after surgery. They ran toward danger while others ran away. I am in awe.

3. The woman who shielded a little girl throughout the shooting.

A father searching desperately for his daughter found a stranger lying on top of her, protecting her with her own body. The woman had been shot but told him: "I've got your daughter, I've been protecting her."

He said to her, "You've saved my daughter's life. I'll be indebted to you for the rest of my life." How do you ever thank a person for that kind of courage? For that level of sacrifice?

4. The everyday people who performed CPR, applied pressure to wounds, and gave first aid.

Footage shows civilians crouched beside victims, performing CPR, stemming bleeding, moving the injured to safety - all while uncertain if the danger had passed. Bystanders rendered aid for 40 minutes to keep victims alive until paramedics could take over.

5. The countless people who have lined up to give blood.

The lines at donation centres snaked around buildings this morning. Lifeblood issued urgent calls for O-negative blood, and Australians showed up. Blood banks are now working to open additional appointments because so many people want to help.

In the face of unspeakable hatred, look at what humanity offers in return: courage, sacrifice, protection, healing, solidarity.

That's what you tell your children. Evil tried to win yesterday. The world can be brutal. But look at all these helpers.

14/12/2025

I am deeply shocked and saddened by the tragic mass shooting at Bondi this evening.

My thoughts are with the victims, their families and loved ones, the first responders, the local community, and the Jewish community during this profoundly distressing time.

Events like this can affect us all, even if we were not directly involved. If you are feeling shaken, overwhelmed, or unsafe, please know that you do not have to go through this alone. I encourage you to reach out to trusted friends, family members, or community supports, and to contact a mental health helpline if you need immediate, confidential support.

I also urge everyone to look after one another in the days ahead, to check in on those who may be vulnerable, and to rely on official sources for accurate information while allowing police and emergency services the space to do their vital work.

Care, connection, and compassion are especially important at times like this.

Support and crisis resources (Australia):

Lifeline – 13 11 14

Beyond Blue – 1300 22 4636

13YARN (Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islander support) – 13 92 76

Headspace (young people) – headspace.org.au

11/12/2025

Recent MRI research shows that dogs experience a stronger brain response to their owners than to food, highlighting a deep emotional bond shaped through thousands of years of domestication. When dogs sense their owners through smell or sound, the brain’s reward and affection centers activate intensely, confirming that their attachment is genuine and biologically rooted. Scientists say this explains behaviors like separation anxiety, loyalty, and joyful reunions, reinforcing that a dog’s strongest connection is to the person they trust and love.

11/12/2025

Kids learn:
• Math
• Biology
• Geography

But not:
• How to self-soothe
• How to identify emotions
• How to communicate needs
• How to handle conflict
• How to tolerate frustration
• How to stay grounded during stress

So people grow up smart but emotionally unskilled.