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Healing with Alisha, Calgary, AB (2025)

09/07/2025

Pay attention to what you judge most in others- it’s often the very thing you judge in yourself… but perhaps wrapped different.

You call them “needy,” while secretly shaming your own longing.
You resent their laziness, while pushing yourself past exhaustion.
You roll your eyes at their need for attention, while hiding your own hunger to be seen.

The judgment isn’t the problem. It is the way we condemn them, and ourselves (inevitably and unconsciously).

Self-compassion means noticing the mirror… and daring to offer those parts of you permission instead of punishment or offering empathy to someone else via seeing yourself in their behaviour vs. othering them to stay safe…and that way we can experience our common humanity…❤️‍🩹♥️

08/30/2025

Sometimes “busy” isn’t about having too much to do, it’s about not wanting to feel what might surface if you slowed down.

That doesn’t make you weak….It means your body has learned that movement feels safer than stillness.

Self-compassion isn’t forcing yourself to meditate or rest when it feels unbearable. It’s beginning with awareness: Where is my busy coming from? And then meeting yourself there, without judgment.
♥️

08/25/2025

I’ve come to see self-worth differently over the past few years… if your anything like me then the mantra you repeat or a belief you “lock in” once and for all that your “worth is not negotiable”…fell short because you find yourself still feeling shame, not good enough and unworthy of love and belonging.

Perhaps at one time we had inherent worth (when we were born and we just needed to be a child) but ever since grade school the world has told you what you’re worth. I think the feeling of worthiness flourishes in connection, in reciprocity, in being mirrored by another who sees and values what you are. It isn’t something given or taken or that you just feel regardless of what someone is reflecting back about their experience of you.

So remind yourself in those moments that when the way you are naturally in the world is resonant with what is needed in the community or relationship..you feel worthy.. it’s a harmony.. a dance.. and it’s co-created. And if we forget this then we may find ourselves hustling for our worth and coming up short- every-time. 😔 ❤️‍🩹

08/22/2025

You don’t need to earn your pause…Let this weekend be an invitation to exhale, soften and be present in the moments you can ♥️

08/15/2025

Gratitude isn’t just about saying “thank you.”

It’s about paying attention…
Noticing the tiny ways life and the people in it show up for you and then letting yourself feel that.

At first, it might feel clumsy or even forced. That’s not a sign it’s not working. That’s a sign your nervous system is learning how to receive.

The more you practice naming and expressing gratitude…to yourself, to a partner, to the people you love…the more you create a feedback loop of safety, trust, and warmth in your relationships.

Noticing what’s here doesn’t erase the hard things.
It makes sure the good things don’t go unnoticed.

💭 What’s one small thing you’re noticing and appreciating today?

08/06/2025

ChatGPT is a powerful tool for reflection, but it isn’t a substitute for human connection.
It can offer insights, validate your experiences, and even soothe in the moment…
But it won’t always challenge you, especially when you need it most. And it is not currently able to protect your information.

Healing often lives in the discomfort we avoid. And sometimes, it takes another human- a therapist, a friend, a partner in a safe space to help us see what we’ve been protecting ourselves from.

This is not a warning against using AI in your healing, just an invitation to stay discerning, curious, and aware in how and what you use it for 🖤

This is what I’ve learned so far, would love to hear your thoughts and anything else you’ve learned👇🏽

08/02/2025

The rise of anonymous apps like “Tea” is telling us something…

We’re holding so much pain that hasn’t been witnessed ❤️‍🩹

So instead of sitting with it, naming it out loud to someone we trust, or grieving what we never got…
We are trying to offload it through exposure. Through retaliation. Through a moment of anonymous “justice.”

But pain that isn’t metabolized becomes projection.
It gets sharper…Meaner…More distant from the part of you that just wanted to be held.

The problem isn’t that people are speaking up. The problem is that so many of us were never taught how to speak up without losing ourselves in the process.

Before you post the thing.
Ask:
-What am I really trying to say?
-Who do I want to become?
-Is this action aligned with that?

Sometimes the most radical act is not silence…it’s learning how to name your truth with clarity, integrity, and care with someone who can hold space for it while also honouring the kind of person you’re still trying to become.

🕊

08/01/2025

Affair recovery is messy. Painful. Complex.
And often oversimplified.

It’s not about forgetting or pretending it didn’t happen.
It’s about facing the rupture with honesty, grief, and accountability from both partners.

Some relationships end.
Others are reborn.
But none come through untouched.

This post isn’t about what you should do.
It’s a reflection for those who choose to stay and rebuild.

There is no going back.
But there can be something new.
❤️‍🩹♥️

07/23/2025

We love a label.

It can bring language to pain, a sense of validation, maybe even relief. But sometimes, the label becomes a cage. A shortcut we use to explain ourselves (or others) without doing the deeper work.

The truth is, most of us aren’t just anxious or avoidant, people pleasers or narcissists. We’re humans with nervous systems shaped by relational wounds. And the path to healing isn’t found in memorizing traits… it’s in meeting the parts of ourselves we’ve disowned… the ones that learned to survive in ways that no longer serve us. And maybe finding people and spaces that have the capacity to see those parts of us too.

This post isn’t anti-diagnosis, it’s a an invitation to go deeper. Healing doesn’t end when we name the thing. It begins when we face it - with honesty, compassion, and accountability 🤍

Let me know your thoughts below 👇🏽

07/20/2025

Let’s talk about what public shame does to us.

We like to think we’re just “witnessing” when a scandal breaks… but often, we’re performing. Rehearsing our own sense of moral high ground. Reposting with captions like “yikes” or “I’d never.” Laughing, analyzing, gossiping…all while hiding from the parts of ourselves we’d never want caught on camera.

We use their mess to avoid our own.
But self-awareness means asking: What part of me feels seen in their fall?

And healing?
Healing can be choosing something deeper than performance…

Even when no one’s watching.

This is an invitation to hold up a mirror and reflect on the part of you that reacts when someone gets caught…the part that judges, distances, or even secretly finds relief in their downfall. What does that part need to feel safe, seen, and human?

07/20/2025

Let’s talk about what public shame does to us.

We like to think we’re just “witnessing” when a scandal breaks… but often, we’re performing. Rehearsing our own sense of moral high ground. Reposting with captions like “yikes” or “I’d never.” Laughing, analyzing, gossiping…all while hiding from the parts of ourselves we’d never want caught on camera.

We use their mess to avoid our own.
But self-awareness means asking: What part of me feels seen in their fall?

And healing?
Healing can be choosing something deeper than performance…

Even when no one’s watching.

Healing with Alisha

09/07/2025

08/30/2025

08/25/2025

08/22/2025

08/15/2025

08/06/2025

08/02/2025

08/01/2025

07/23/2025

07/20/2025

07/20/2025

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