From Crashing to Conquering -Working moms being who they were meant to be, Barrhead, AB (2025)

01/09/2024

Who makes New Year’s Resolutions?
What are yours?
How has it been for these first few days of 2024?
(Tell me, too, if you skip making them, and why?)

11/10/2023

Anxiety 😟
Do you feel the struggle? So sorry to hear this!
A few things that help me shift out of anxious mode:
1. Box breathing for at least 5 rounds. More is better. Breath in for a count of 4 - watch your tummy rise as you do so you know you are inhaling properly for max O2. Hold the inhaled breath for a count of 4. Release through a count of 4. Hold your breath after released for a count of 4. Repeat for 5+ rounds.

2. Write down all the things that are stressing you. Then they aren’t floating in your brain. It does something for our brains to have it written - even if you throw it out after. It’s like it files it instead of randomly floating around.

3. Speak aloud or write out 10 things you are so thankful for. Even if you have to start super small. “I love this t-shirt that is so comfortable and I am glad I get to wear it.” You will get a couple surface things out of the way and then be able to go deeper. “So thankful I have a friend who will check on me when I tell her I am struggling.” Or “I am so thankful for a child who loves me unconditionally and brightens my life.”
It is such a shift.

4. Grounding yourself. Be super present in the moment by thinking of what you are smelling, hearing, seeing, tasting, touching at that very moment. Moving yourself to nature is supercharging it. But even if you are lying in your bed it works. Get quiet in your soul to be present.
-Feel how the weight of your body feels on the bed. How your pj’s are feeling on your body, how your blanket and pillow feel touching you.
- what do you hear? Furnace, clock ticking, hum of electronic, dryer running?
- what do you taste? Toothpaste, onions from supper?
- what do you smell? Crisp air, dust, deodorant, etc
- what do you see? Lights from passing cars? Glow from electronic? Dust motes floating, husband’s chest rising and falling?

I hope you can pull out the peace and strength you never knew you had today! Or maybe you can sneak a 15 minute nap? Be kind to yourself and go to bed as early as possible. Being well rested makes a profound difference.

10/28/2023

This has been me way too often. 🙋‍♀️ Anyone else?
Thankfully I have friends that check in and show up! 😍

10/26/2023

"How do we find peace, sanity and safety in the midst of the chaos in our lives as working moms?
I recognize this feeling... I have been here before. My friends and I call it spinning or spiralling...the racing thoughts. Most of which I can't put my finger on...
I feel like I have more to manage than I can manage...
I haven't figured out how to do it all... I HAVE experienced the peace that passes understanding..."
Read in my latest blog about my dad sharing a FUNERAL passage during my first WEDDING! I had no idea at the time that this very passage was so rich with life and hope and would be a lifeline for me in the years to come. (I included a wedding picture of 23 year old me too - just for fun!)
"The chaos dims and fades away as I rest in the truth that Jesus is loving, guiding, holding and protecting me through all the crazy."
Check the comments for the link to read the whole blog.

10/20/2023

I have a couple mugs with butterflies on them. Butterflies are pretty, but didn’t mean much to me, outside of beauty, until 2020. Not because of the pandemic, but because of big stuff I was going through personally.

I found myself totally unable to function as I used to. I would take a super quick break during my work day and use the washroom and be surprised to discover there were tears rolling down my cheeks and I didn’t even know I was crying! Work was intense, emotional stuff. Family had fallen apart. Finances were tricky. I was totally depleted.

I needed time off… I took 3 months off work. Who does that?? I have LOTS of friends who go through stuff and keep working and carrying on. I felt some shame.

My friend shared with me that she had a vision of me during this time. She saw me as a beautiful caterpillar crawling around doing all the things that caterpillars were created to do. But then the caterpillar version of me went into a chrysalis and started going through all the painful and profound transformation that caterpillars go through in the chrysalis.

Then after some time had passed, I emerged from the chrysalis as a breath-takingly beautiful butterfly, who no longer crawled on the ground, but COULD FLY, with victory and joy!

She advised I lean into the transformative process and the refining fire that these 3 months had for me, because God was doing something AMAZING with me in this time.
She told me that I have always been beautiful and made a difference in the world. But there was no need to cling to being the caterpillar and instead allow the metamorphosis of this season to take place.

That helped me immensely! I snuggled into my cocoon… not to sleep, but to heal and be transformed. I joined an online support group, got coaching, got counselling, took a healing course, read the Bible, went for a LOT of walks, cuddled my daughter a lot, played games, took lots of soaks in the tub, ate nourishing foods, cleaned my house, took naps. And after 3 months I felt like a new person. I went back to work, and other commitments - transformed.

Now these mugs are reminders both of where I came from and who I am meant to be. 🐛 🦋

10/19/2023

I am so sorry. 🙈❤️

10/16/2023

Always…

10/14/2023

Comparing with others… It’s the biggest mistake that I made when I was an overwhelmed working mom who was crashing a few years ago.

The comparison game is another form of envy.

I compared my kids’ childhood to my own childhood… I had two parents who stayed together. I lived on a farm with a stay at home mom and a stay at home dad. If I needed or wanted my parents, one of them was always there.
We had animals galore and could freely tame them and play with them… calves, kittens, puppies, pigs, sheep, goats. It was a child’s dream come true! We were barefoot farm kids.

We had the kind of home where youth group could be hosted, neighbors could gather, the church picnic could be held. The supper table was often set for more places than our big family because someone always had a friend or two over and it was welcomed!

We went to church as a family on Sundays, Bible study on Wednesdays and Youth Group on Fridays. I practically grew up at the church and it felt safe, like home.

My own children were not growing up with ANY of that! I was divorced and remarried. Our house was a small rental and we weren’t allowed to have animals, never mind make a living off the land. Both myself and my husband worked… in fact I had up to 3 jobs at a time. My husband wasn't that comfortable having company over or going to church. My kids didn’t really want to go to youth group, Bible Study or Church....

To read more about what I used to compare and how I broke from from the comparison game, click the link in the comment to read the rest of my blog.

10/11/2023

End the Insanity of "What's for Supper?"
Here is my very first blog post EVER! See a couple excerpts below. Check the comments for the link to read the whole post.

"Every day just before suppertime I realized I had done it again! Spent an entire busy day having no idea what we would be eating when I got home from work - although it had crossed my mind about 15 times… I needed to figure out what to eat tonight!...
..Then the chorus started to ring out, “What is there to eat?”
“Can we have popcorn?”
“I’m hungry.”

…and I hadn’t even had a breather since 6 a.m. this morning.
Why were they always so hungry?? Feeding them was going to be the end of me! I loved to cook and bake. But it was a never ending cycle and I didn’t feel like I had time or energy for it..."

10/08/2023

We can do ANYTHING for 15 minutes! Even something we have procrastinated for LONG time. Eww gross... under my kitchen sink. Grab your cleaning supplies and join me! (3 bags or bins for: giveaway, throw away and put away. A bucket of hot, soapy water. Rags. And a nice drink so it feels like you are doing something wonderful! Which you are - you are conquering something that has been bothering you for awhile!)

10/07/2023

I have put it off long enough.
I can do anything for
15 minutes!
At 6:30 p.m. I will do a task LIVE here. Clean under my sink. What will you clean at the same time? Check comments for what tools to gather!

10/03/2023

I’m feeling some fall cleaning coming on. 🍁🍂🧽🫧🧹 I once heard “you can’t clean clutter” and it has stuck with me. It doesn’t matter how much we clean, if it’s cluttered, we just keep moving it around and it doesn’t look much better.
Cleaning and decluttering tips welcome! ⬇️

Here is mine: grab a bag (grocery or garbage, you pick) set a timer for 10-15 minutes. Run from room to room finding things to throw away or give away. It’s fun to race the timer! Set a goal for how many items to put in by the time the timer goes. My favorite number for this is 21 items to RELEASE! Don’t overthink, just go with it!

If you get rid of something you later wish you had not gotten rid of, you will find another one when you need it. I know! This happens to me and I end up never regretting releasing more stuff. So don’t be fearful. You can do it! Feels like I can breathe easier and be more who I want to be when I make space in my life.

10/01/2023

How did they do it?? And all the food was homemade and 10 kids and… and… and… Most didn’t work outside the home. But they worked HARD! And had time to help their neighbor. Hats off to Margaret. And hats off to you as you navigate all the things Margaret never had to deal with with.

09/29/2023

I am often asked how I have found such good friends. (Really, I have the BEST friends - even when time has passed since we got together!) And I have also discovered there are a lot of very lonely women out there!
Here are my “making AWESOME friends” tips. 💕

I actually naturally tend toward being alone - and it doesn’t make me lonely. BUT… my sweetest and richest moments - besides those with my family - are those I have spent doing real life with true friends. They are not content to let me stay stagnant. They press me to grow. And we laugh a lot. I become the best version of myself as I spend time with them.

Find an organization/group that aligns with something that matters to you. Become a volunteer. During your volunteer interview, make sure you say you want to work alongside others.

I have found my closest friends by coming together for a cause.

Also, a couple strategies I use to be a good, approachable friend even for people I don’t know yet..

- Always be the first to say hi. Never assume they are ignoring you. That is potential friendship killing stuff. It gets into your head and makes you insecure. Always assume they were distracted, busy, overwhelmed, didn’t recognize you because they have too much going on, were feeling super shy and were worried you might reject them. I know, sometimes people are jerks. But always assume the best anyway. It changes you!
Even if you talk about it with others after, say, “I said hi but I don’t think they heard me.” Or “ they didn’t make eye contact with me even though I tried. I think they might have a lot on their plate.”
It feels different in your heart when you talk that way and leaves your spirit open for a more positive interaction with them or someone else in the future. Makes you a better friend when you get the opportunity.

- Ask them open-ended questions about themselves (not yes or no answers… if they are shy, the conversation will die with short questions and answers.)
Good examples of open ended questions: How did you learn how to do that?
What kinds of things did you do there? What had been good for you about moving here?
What has been hard for you about moving here?
How do you get your child to sit still for that?
What do you like about working here?

- Listening and being engaged with them as they answer is awesome. it is also good to use a SHORT phrase or story to relate back to what they are saying, but don’t take over the conversation. Otherwise they might feel shut down. “Oh my goodness! My child almost finished me off when they spilled a can of paint on my couch! How in the world did you get the nail polish off the dog?”

I have also found most of my besties at church - especially attending Bible studies or other church events. But I never developed close relationship with anyone even at church until I applied some of the above concepts. You might feel like they should be taking those actions with you if you are newer. And you are right. But I find so many people are feeling nervous and a bit awkward too with people they don’t know. So it’s best to bite the bullet and reach out.

If you are with a group of people who make a circle and you aren’t able to squeeze in… maybe they are inconsiderate. Or maybe they are just accidentally doing what they are most comfortable doing.
Maybe they aren’t “your people”
Or maybe you can engage with someone by being super bold and saying, “I would love to visit with you ladies. Would it be ok if I squeeze in?”
Bold!! But ANYONE with a good heart would immediately open the circle.

It’s a funny story later when you and your new bestie reminisce over when you met and you tell them you were peeing your pants with nervousness but also wanting to be her friend so you stepped out.

If the circle of people gets awkward and quiet, you know those aren’t your people and you can move on knowing you dodged a bullet and are one opportunity closer to “your people.”

You can do this! You are soo close to finding the women, the sisters you get to do life with! We were made to do life together. Don’t give up on this important aspect of life.

Share your stories below… the good, the bad and the ugly about making friends!👇 Or share your additional tips for finding really good, meaningful friendships.

09/28/2023

What are you reading? These two books have kicked my butt into gear! 🌟
Top take aways so far:
- protect the quietest hours at daybreak to start with exercise, self renewal and personal growth
- ruthlessly eliminate distractions and diversions to pour out your most focussed work in blocks of time
- daily improvements of 1% amounts to massive change with time. Focus on the small incremements and stick with them
- every little action I take (positive or negative) is a vote for the type of person I want to become.

09/26/2023

What is ONE THING you want to accomplish by the end of the year? (pssst....we have a whole 3 months left!)

09/23/2023

Soo… could have been me when I was working outside of the home… How do you busy moms make to places on time?? Or even early?

09/22/2023

I am working on some meal planning resources to share - ones I am excited to use myself! In the mean time, what’s for supper??

From Crashing to Conquering -Working moms being who they were meant to be