03/03/2024
Somewhere between the ages of two and three years old, I had a life altering experience, a short series of events that would shape me for the rest of my life . And not in a good way, because I was forced into acquiring a false image that did not reflect me at all . Now that I look back, there was nothing that I could have done to change the trajectory of my life because I was too young to realize what was actually going on at the time . I just felt that I had done something very bad and wrong, but I didn’t exactly know what that bad thing was . Not until a few years later when I realized that I had been a victim of s*xual abuse perpetrated by a young uncle of mine . But still, the notion that I had done something terribly wrong, permeated every aspect of my life
In my teenage years, I started having flashbacks of the earlier events, and after mentioning it to my Dad he came forth with a few uncomfortable truths that helped me realize why I became the target of abuse . No doubt, he could see the lie as well . He always promised me there would be plenty of funds allotted for me in his will so that I could hire a therapist to fix me up from the unrelenting abuses perpetrated against me by my mother and brother after I was s*xually abused . And guess what? They stole not only my life, but my inheritance too . Money that was willed to me, and intended to be used for me to repair myself from many years of physical emotional and mental abuse I endured within a psychopathic family . They stole every last trinket he willed to me, every last penny, the mineral rights, his envelope and final words for me . They embezzled all of it then turfed me out onto the street, as Christian conservatives often do . What a tragedy for me and so many other victims of old school religious/political cults
By age 4, the loathing towards me started to expand into every nook and cranny of my life . My mother was covertly programming everyone to hate me . She became verbally hostile and physically violent towards me, teaching my older brother to hate, abuse and degrade me as well, and to worship and glorify the uncle who s*xually abused me . All in an attempt to keep the secret quiet and away from public knowledge . Nobody wants a damaged, s*xually abused kid around so might as well kill it, or silence it at least . It was their way of hiding the big bad secret, which in fact was no big deal in the big scheme of my life, very little damage was caused . But they had to blow it up way out of proportion, due to their programmed beliefs and demented beliefs surrounding s*x . So they labelled me the bad girl, the ugly girl, the mentally ill one, drug addict loser whom no one should ever trust . And that false image is forever stuck in the minds of every Christian Conservative around . It’s a huge family with a lot of Christian Conservative connections and supporters helping them silence me, and stop me from showing the world that I AM NOT mentally ill, I am not a drug user, not a liar or cheater as they claim
Today, we call this savage, manipulative technique, Predictive Programming . It’s when a cult, or a group of hive mined people get together and create false narratives about people and situations in order to evade public scrutiny and keep deep dark criminal secrets hidden from public knowledge . It’s a narcissistic coercion technique also used to steal money, harass people, gaslight, deceive or commit other crimes against helpless, hopeless innocents that society has destroyed and discarded with glee in their hearts and minds . Child abuse like this keeps the wheels of corruption spinning around and provides the ones at the top with luxury lifestyles . And that is why suffering exists, psychopathic controllers make a lot of money from it as they wallow in feeling superior over us, the inferior unfortunate ones that they created
I’m sure everyone in my family knows about that glitch in our ancestral lineage and gossiped endlessly behind my back about how awful I was, and other family members struggling with life . As sensitive empaths, we can feel that heavy artificial energy . I felt so utterly uncomfortable at family gatherings but I wasn’t quite sure why at first . I was so abused by my mother and brothers that I couldn’t even speak for such a long long time, not until I finally left the nest . I just played along with the common perception that I was a bad unholy girl, and that my uncle was the best thing that ever happened to life . It had to be that way in their minds, they had to create a façade to hide the truth and help the family save face . I don’t think that any Christian Conservative will ever admit to s*xual abuse, especially not in their own families . And that is what keeps that big blue corrupted wheel of child exploitation going nonstop . It’s the great many lies, deceptions and delusions embedded into so many old guard style families that cling onto false narratives
The s*xual abuse that I experienced as a toddler was nothing at all compared to a lifetime of community persecution, s*xual abuse, physical and verbal abuse, degradation, oppression, smear campaigns and relentless covert harassment perpetrated by family members and their cheerleaders . The original sin should not have been an issue, my uncle wasn’t wrong and neither was I . That childhood situation could have easily blown over if it wasn’t for all the lies put in place to try and evade the truth . The beliefs and attitudes of everyone who knew about it kept that false narrative rolling until tragedy struck again and again and again . And even then, the lie lives on . I know my uncle meant no harm, he was just a young curious teenager, probably not even realizing it was inappropriate . The reactions and actions that followed was the real crime . I KNOW my uncle felt pangs of utter shame and guilt at times . I could see it and feel it when he was younger, before he started numbing out his emotions with extreme gluttony and alcohol . But it was all unnecessary, it was just the personal beliefs of others, projecting their opinions onto him, and he felt that he had no choice but to live up to the pre-conceived standards that were implemented for him as an innocent teenager
And I thought I had to live down to their ill conceived notions and expectations of me . I numbed out all my shame, guilt and doubt by hiding away from society, when I wasn’t being attacked in some way by a member of the Christian conservative MOB . Once we become s*xually abused, we then become targets of a lifetime abuses in order to try and shut us up . But in between running from predators, I was able to experiment with all different types of natural healing modalities, and I finally healed enough to realize that I was Predictively Programmed, TRICKED into believing that I was a hopeless failure when I was actually a victim of s*xual abuse . I guess in their minds, I was damaged beyond repair and the best solution was to get rid of me and sweep that inconvenient truth under the carpet forever . It was difficult to accept the fact that their opinion and image of me was nothing but a deceptive façade created by old worn out Christian Conservative values that were projected onto me . And I let that false façade shape my life for way too long
The family actually sacrificed both of our lives in an attempt to hide the facts, and attempt to portray a squeaky clean image in the eyes of others . My uncle certainly lived up to the standard that was set up for him by others, and I certainly lived down to the standard that was set up for me by others . But in the end, everyone suffered deeply and so did the entire ancestral lineage . Living up or down to the expectations of others is a pathetic life indeed . And that’s why the kids are rebelling right now, they want to explore more than just basic human survival and creating more and more human stock . There is no longer a need for everyone to get married and produce more stock, we have moved well beyond the level of sustaining the species and the kids just aren’t interested in the old game anymore . And neither am I
Many of my ex family members and supporters all over the place are still having a blast playing the false charade . Still slandering, discrediting sabotaging me, in an attempt to maintain the charade . And that is the REAL crime in life, that hive minded mentality that refuses to acknowledge truth, facts and concrete evidence . Christian Conservatives are no different than cult members, they have lost the ability to think for themselves and will hide and evade and never face up . They only continue to carry on with their false realities because their entire lives are so embedded in it, or so they think . Some crowds will fight tooth and nail to hide inconvenient truths . But artificial narratives and false realities never seem to last that long, they develop cracks along the way and always crumble over time . The only way to build a solid foundation for anyone, any group, any organization or community is by taking responsibility and taking care of inconvenient truths that create cracks in foundations . That is how we learn to do and be better people . But hive minded cult members are not capable of things like self introspection, logical thinking or authentic expression . Because they seem to believe that they, and the others within the cult are born sinners, but perfect in the eyes of the lord anyway . So why not commit as many dirty little crimes as we can get away with, as long as we don’t get caught . That seems to be the motto behind Christian Conservative Mobbery
Hey, did you see that? I just created a new word to describe what they actually do to us . Mobbers commit Mobbery, which is the most effective way for psychopaths to covertly make money and wipe out peeps like me who just might upset the cart, so to speak . I’m glad I learned to finally speak because I have a lot more to say about my experiences within my artificially programmed life of horrors
