Relationship Works

07/15/2024

Transparency, boundaries, and more.

05/26/2023

Love V Crush …

05/23/2023

Our parents worked with the capacity and tools that they had. They worked with the understanding and learning they received from their parents, culture, religion and society. All this is true AND it can also be true that it just was not enough. As a child, as a needy dependent, we needed more and without it, we live with a void that now shows up with friends, family, work and of course - intimate relationships.
You can learn to heal from this,
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05/18/2023

Intimacy is so much more than traditional acts of s*x and s*xual activity. Giving our relationships and brains a variety of ways to love and be loved can create immense closeness for you and your partner.

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05/17/2023

Boundaries are your best friend, to help ensure that you can help others, while keeping yourself in a healthy place 🤍

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05/17/2023

Our wise mind, or our wise inner parent is always within us, and we can enhance and build our relationships by consistently leaning into these affirmations.
Consistency in practice helps to develop new neural pathways, so when our inner child needs support, we will have the language and tools, ready to reparent and love ourselves.

05/17/2023

Do NOT flood your partner

Using big catastrophic language, a louder tone and exaggerated terms allows us to feel as if our message is getting across in a bigger and more important way. When we do this, our nervous system is engaged, and we are typically engaging the nervous system of our partner. So often, we do this, because the story we tell ourselves is that we are not being heard, we are being minimized, what we are saying, is not important, and mostof all, that we are not safe.
When we step away from flooding our partners, and not using damaging language, we actually have the opportunity to get curious and ensure that we are both understanding each other. We also have the opportunity to take breaks, and to find new ways to explain ourselves that don’t do any damage to our nervous system and relationship.

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04/20/2023

Flooding our partner works two ways:
We flood ourselves emotionally with only feelings, and no pause for logic, keeping us rooted in survival mode.
Also, our partners are not given the psychological space they need to process, think, feel or reflect.

If you find yourself falling into any of these traps, you’re not alone.
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04/18/2023

One of the most powerful pieces of communication in any relationship is understanding.
Learning to take pause to listen and understand your partner, while self regulating your own emotions, will allow you to keep the focus on them - not you. Understanding allows the narrative that everyone is different and gets a side to their experience- it’s a skill everyone needs, but few possess.
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04/12/2023

When we create this chaos or drama of catastrophic thinking, we are inviting our past wounds into a present conversation or experience.

Learning the skills of differentiation, and also how to understand our childhood wounds and their impact on these experiences (or triggers), is how we move forward in healthy, meaningful ways.

Let us help you 💌

04/10/2023

Wise Words from Thich Nhat Hanh

04/07/2023

Repeat that again… 🤍

04/06/2023

Short term discomfort > Long term suffering

04/03/2023

Shame so often fuels the anger that we expose on the surface. Your anger is the part of you that wants to be treated fair and kindly. Shame; a learned feeling from childhood, family and society, restricts these feelings. Overtime, typically only bubbles up in one avenue… Anger.

Learning to understand, and unearth that shame, the shame that was taught to us at a young age, will help us uncover and heal the anger we exhibit today.

04/03/2023

It takes time and effort, to reestablish the sense of safety you need for a relationship to thrive and continue to grow.

Something “new“ can symbolize the start of a new chapter or a fresh start, but consistent, deliberate efforts with an undertone of trustworthiness is key.

04/03/2023

D.T Suzuki 🤍 🕊️

12/27/2022

05/07/2022