04/02/2025
From the moment a person learns they are pregnant, the language surrounding their experience begins to mold their expectations. Are they told birth is dangerous, painful, and something to endure? Or are they told itâs a powerful, physiological process that their body is designed to navigate? The stories we hear, the metaphors we use, even the medical terminology, all of it shapes not just our mindset but our bodyâs response to labor itself.
And it goes deeper than just pregnancy. The way we talk about s*x, reproduction, and the body long before conception plants the seeds for how we feel about birth when the time comes. If we grow up hearing that birth is terrifying, unpredictable, and something we need to be saved from, how can we possibly approach it with trust?
Thatâs why, as doulas, birth workers, and even just as members of a culture that desperately needs to reframe its view of birth, we have a responsibility to be intentional with our words. Strength-based language, affirming language, language that centers the birthing personâs power, this all matters.
And sometimes, the most powerful thing we can offer is silence. In labor, thereâs so much pressure to coach, encourage, or reassure, but true support often comes in holding space without words. In silence, a woman finds her own rhythm, her own instincts, her own primal knowing. She doesnât need to be saved from birth, she needs to be witnessed in it.
So letâs rethink the words we use. Letâs tell stories that empower rather than instill fear. Letâs choose language that fosters confidence instead of doubt. And when the moment calls for it, letâs embrace the silence that allows birth to unfold in its most powerful, undisturbed form.
