03/23/2025
✨Surrender ✨
I was guided to for the candlelight restorative class this morning.
During Agnistambhasana, known as “Fire Log” pose, a deep hip opener and stretch, I found myself surrendering to the emotions that were surfacing. Emotions that were likely stored in my hips.
I allowed the tears to fall.
I allowed what needed to be released, to surface.
I found myself being overwhelmed with gratitude for this beautiful and precious body that has carried me throughout my last 37 years. I found myself thanking it for holding the traumas that I have endured.
I thanked it for carrying the 3 beautiful babies that it allowed me to birth into this world, and I thanked it for carrying me through my intense work-outs at the gym.
Then I remembered something that I came across last night while searching for a specific track on YouTube. I listened for a minute to a heart frequency track, with the words of the ho’oponopono.
These words came into my mind and I found myself speaking them to my body, as tears continued to flow.
I apologized to my body. I apologized for pushing it beyond its capabilities during my work-outs, and for not listening to it, or honouring its needs. I apologized for suppressing so much emotion, and not allowing things to be released. I apologized for self-soothing in unhealthy ways for the last 6 months, ways that have caused me to put 20lbs on, ways that have harmed the health of this beautiful vessel that I was gifted with in this lifetime. I allowed the pain to be released.
Over and over, I said to my body,
I’m sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
As the yoga sequence continued, I found myself in savasana a few minutes early, with my knees bent, and rocking them ever so slowly, side to side, as I took the time to process and release.
The teacher spoke the affirmations of the yoga studio, “I love my body. I love my life.”
Another confirmation to what was enfolding.
I repeated the words.
I love my body.
I love my life.
She spoke a few words about how things come to us when we need them.
I reflected on those words.
I needed to be here this morning.
I needed to hear the ho'oponopono prayer last night.
I needed to reconcile and reconnect with my body.
I sat with those thoughts, reflecting on this current season of my life.
I am being guided back to my body. People are coming into my life, talking about healthy foods, healing foods, and inspiring me with their own daily movement practices. A friend of mine showed me last week, a way to ask my body questions and receive an answer; a way to build trust back within my body.
It is so beautiful how the universe sends us messages and signs through synchronicity, if we are open to receiving these signs.
Today, I am so thankful for divine guidance, for the amazing people in my life, and for this beautiful body of mine 🩷🙏🏼