Peaceful Journey End of Life Doula Services Kawartha Lakes

03/06/2025

Important video- watch here ⬇️

https://youtu.be/g0s_9tAUqzw?si=CPlPClje22_lWwb6

03/06/2025

❤️

“Gabby, after my husband died, a friend said to me, “you loved him so much.” This made me feel like I had to stop loving him because he was gone.”

I responded with…
When someone you love dies, your love does not die with them. You will love them forever. Don’t add a “d” to love. It’s not “I loved them,” it is “I love them and I always will.”

xo
Gabby
www.thehospiceheart.net

03/06/2025

03/06/2025

I recently sat down with Jim Parker, senior editor of Hospice News and Palliative Care News, to talk about what we can do better in our society and the mainstream medical industry to ensure that patients and families have what they need to have positive end of life experiences.

Here Are The Challenges We are Facing Today…

~Over 10,000 people turn 65 every single day in America.
~According to a Hospice Gallup Poll, 90% of them say they want to be cared for at home if they become terminally ill.
~A Recent Medicare survey determined that 98% of the hands-on care for those at the end of life is done by family caregivers.

There’s just one problem…

Family caregivers usually don't know the first thing about how to provide quality end of life care.

One hundred years ago the skill of caring for the dying was handed down from generation to generation, but it is all but lost in our modern-day society and this has devastating effects for both patients and their loved ones. It’s time to bring these skills back.

One of the questions I was asked during this interview is: Why did you write the book? What was the need you were trying to fill?

Here is my answer:

I was a hospice nurse working in home hospice care, and for most people, it wasn’t going as well. People were coming on services very late, because we don’t talk about end of life. We don’t plan on it, and we’re not educating doctors on how to have these conversations. And so by the time we were receiving people in hospice, sometimes they had just days, and it’s very hard to get things in order then.

So for me, thinking as a hospice nurse, if I’m supposed to teach those loved ones how to do the care, I can’t do that with such a short amount of time. When the fear of death is in front of us, people are blocked from learning. So with my experience, I developed a Doulagivers Model of Care, which is three distinct phases that I identified, of end of life and the interventions families could use in each one of those stages.

And I went to the [hospice] CEO and I said that I have an idea for this. I think that we can train family caregivers with this complete training on how to care for their loved ones. And he said, ‘This is great, but we can’t do it because it’s not going to fit into the reimbursement model right now.’

So I just went to the library and I held a seminar, and all of a sudden people came out. The room was packed to learn about how to care for somebody at the end of life. Then I put it live online, and heard from people all over the world. The book was another way that we could get that out and hopefully reach more people again in something that touches us all in this life.”

The Good Death Book is a continuation of the mission I started many years ago with these free trainings.

Here’s what Library Journal had to say about it:

"The Good Death Book is an essential guide to every aspect of dying from hospice care to spiritual and real-world needs and can also serve as an excellent manual for readers seeking bereavement/grief support."

It’s time to start having open conversations about this guaranteed part of our human experience. It’s time to start embracing and preparing for this natural life event rather than avoiding and fearing it unnecessarily.

Because here’s the real truth… With the right kindness, education, and support - death can be the natural, sacred experience it was meant to be.

xoxoxo Suzanne

Read the full article here: https://hospicenews.com/2025/02/24/hospice-nurse-author-suzanne-obrien-on-engaging-families-earlier-at-end-of-life/

02/16/2025

After a diagnosis of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) in 1991, Sue Rodriguez challenged the validity of Canada’s prohibition on assisted…

02/16/2025

We need to keep advocating for change . I know that if I should fall ill with an illness such as Alzheimers or Dementia, Parkinson’s I would not want to become a burden on my family and have them watch me deteriorate which could draw out for many years. If there is no quality of life and I know what my wishes would be before loosing capacity , I should be able to have these wishes in place and they should be respected and honoured.

Help Advocate For Advanced Requests ❤️

On this day in 1994, Sue Rodriguez chose to end her life and suffering with the assistance of an anonymous doctor after the Supreme Court of Canada ruled against her request for a legal assisted death. Her courageous fight helped spark a national movement for end-of-life rights.

Although much progress has been made in the over 30 years since Rodriguez's death, there is still work to be done. Today, many people still aren’t eligible because they are in the early stages of a capacity-eroding condition — such as dementia, Parkinson’s, or Huntington’s disease – and cannot put in place an advance request for MAID.

Dying With Dignity Canada believes that advance requests for MAID should be a legal end-of-life option for those diagnosed with a grievous and irremediable medical condition. To join us in our effort to ensure this choice for people across Canada, respond to Health Canada's national consultation on advance requests and download our Advocacy Toolkit and Action Guide at the links below.

Complete the survey (deadline: February 14): https://ow.ly/JEzG50UXPc2

Download the advocacy toolkit: https://ow.ly/LVxF50UXPc3

01/28/2025

❤️

01/28/2025

This 🤍

01/05/2025

When I returned to work after my brother died, I went to see my first patient. I walked into the room of a young man who was dying, and at his bedside was a woman crying. She looked up at me, with tear-stained eyes, and said, "how do I tell my brother goodbye." I knew exactly how... because I had just done it myself. This question caught me off guard, and I felt nervous and fragile, as I carefully selected my words. I sat down next to her, and I shared my story, and I gave her some of the lessons I took from my experience, hoping it would help her.

My brother and I were not talking at the time he was rushed to the hospital; it had been a few years since we had a real conversation. Every day that I was at his bedside, I apologized, and I forgave him, and I said that when he wakes up, we would do better. I promised him that. And then one day he woke up, they removed the ventilator, and he was able to talk. I asked him if he heard me talking to him, and he responded, “I am sorry too.” I know he didn’t say that because he thought he was going to die, he said that because he thought he was going to live.

I have since used those days that I sat at his bedside, to help guide and support others as they do the same. I am realizing now, that while I miss him terribly, and would give anything to have him back, that time with him allowed me to see things from a different perspective, to be a little more sensitive to what others feel, and to relate to those at the bedside in a different, and even better way.

I am sad often, and my grief is not going anywhere, but I feel like his light is constantly shining through me, reminding me that he is and always will be with me. My wound is deep, and it is painful, but his light softens it, while also guiding me every day as I sit at bedsides and comfort others. My time with my brother before he died has reminded me to let go of anger and regret, to use my words in a kind and comforting way, to embrace every moment that I am alive, and to find gratitude and joy in each day.

If I could do anything differently, it would be to go back in time, forgive and forget, and savor the time I could have spent with him. We wasted so much time… Please learn from me and my brother to not waste time… and if someone you love has died, find a way to allow their light to continue to shine through and around you, lighting a path for others so they too can find their way.

"The wound is the place where the light enters you."
Rumi

xo
Gabby

Find this blog here:
https://www.thehospiceheart.net/post/finding-light-in-the-darkness