04/09/2025
Great book. š
I didnāt plan to listen to The Untethered Soul. It found me. I was scrolling through Audible, looking for somethingāmaybe a book on mindfulness, maybe something to quiet the mental noise that had been running at full speed for weeks. Then I saw it. The title alone caught me. Untethered. Free. Unburdened. Exactly what I didnāt realize I was looking for. Then came the voice. Michael A. Singerās narration isnāt flashy or dramatic. Itās calm, steady, like a river thatās been flowing for centuries, never in a hurry but always moving. Thereās something about his toneāso measured, so unshakenāthat makes you listen differently. This wasnāt a book to be read; it was a book to be absorbed. I thought I was just pressing play on an audiobook. What I got was a lesson in watching my own mind, in detaching from the things that tie me in knots, in realizing that I am not the thoughts that keep me up at night. These are seven lessons that stuck with meāwhether I was ready for them or not.
1. You Are Not the Voice in Your Head: The book opens with a simple but jarring truth: You are not your thoughts. That nonstop commentary in your head? The one narrating your life, replaying conversations, overanalyzing everything? Thatās not you. Thatās just a voice. Singer drives this home with an example so clear itās impossible to ignoreāhe asks you to listen to that voice. To really listen. Once you do, you realize how ridiculous it can be. Itās like having an over-caffeinated radio host in your head, talking just to fill space. And once you separate yourself from it, something shifts. You stop identifying with every thought that pops up. You get space. You get relief. This lesson alone can change how you experience life. If you are not your thoughts, then who are you?
2. Your Mind is a Roommate You Canāt EvictāBut You Can Ignore: Singer describes the inner voice as an annoying roommateāone that never shuts up, constantly worries, and rarely makes sense. Would you take life advice from that kind of roommate? No. But we do it with our thoughts every day. Hearing this in his voice made it hit differently. He wasnāt just giving advice; he was holding up a mirror. How often do we take our thoughts at face value, believing them just because theyāre there? What if we didnāt? What if we learned to just let them talk without obeying? If youāve ever been trapped in your own mind, this lesson is freedom.
3. Emotions Are Like a Passing StormāLet Them Pass: One of the most profound moments in the book is when Singer talks about emotionsānot as things to control, but as things to witness. He compares them to a storm: they rise, they rage, and then they pass. But only if we let them. Most of us, he explains, donāt let emotions pass. We hold onto them. We relive them. We tell ourselves stories about them. And thatās what keeps us stuck. But if we can just watch them, without grabbing onto them, theyāll move through us like wind through an open window. The next time you feel overwhelmed, try this. Step back. Watch. Feel, but donāt hold. It works.
4. The Heart Wants to Stay OpenāWeāre the Ones Who Shut It: Singer describes the heart as naturally open, naturally free. It wants to stay that way. But every time we get hurt, disappointed, or afraid, we shut it a little more. Over time, we build walls. We think weāre protecting ourselves, but really, weāre just trapping ourselves inside. This lesson stung. Because itās true. How many times have we closed off, convinced we were doing the right thing? But every time we do, weāre not protecting ourselvesāweāre just cutting ourselves off from joy, love, and connection. Next time you feel your heart closing, try the opposite. Keep it open. See what happens.
5. Pain is Inevitable, Suffering is Optional: Singer makes a distinction that hit me hard: pain is just an experience. It happens. But suffering? Thatās what we do after the pain. Thatās the replaying, the resisting, the holding onto it long after itās over. Hearing this made me realize how much suffering is self-inflicted. Yes, pain happens. But the stories we tell about it, the way we cling to itāthatās what makes it last longer than it needs to. The next time something painful happens, remember: feel it, acknowledge it, but donāt build a home in it.
6. Let Go or Be Dragged: Singer talks a lot about resistanceāhow we fight life instead of flowing with it. We hold onto the past, onto expectations, onto control. And every time we do, we suffer. He uses a metaphor that stuck with me: life is like a river. You can either let it carry you or you can cling to the rocks, fighting the current. Guess which one feels better? The lesson? Surrender doesnāt mean giving up. It means letting go of what was never yours to control in the first place.
7. Freedom is Just on the Other Side of Fear: One of the most powerful takeaways is that fear is just energy. Itās not a wallāitās a door. And every time we lean into it instead of running from it, we grow. Singer tells stories of moments when he had to face fear head-on, and the message is clear: fear isnāt the problem. Avoiding it is. If we can just sit with fear, move through it instead of around it, we unlock a whole new level of freedom. This lesson hit me right in the chest. Because how many times have we avoided something just because it scared us? What if the thing we fear is actually the key to everything we want?
Book/Audiobook: https://amzn.to/3G4sM00
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