Memento Psychotherapy & Counselling

04/07/2026

Why do we repeat the same patterns even when we know better? In my latest post, I break down the psychology behind familiar cycles and why awareness alone often isn't enough.

You understand your attachment style. You've read the books, maybe done years of therapy. You can explain, with impressive precision, exactly why you do the things you do. And then you do it again.

03/30/2026

My latest post takes a look at the unique exhaustion that shows up for people who are earnestly trying to change, but in doing that actually end up avoiding their problems. If you’re feeling like your self-improvement isn't actually improving your life, this one's for you.


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There's a particular kind of exhaustion that shows up in therapy offices, and it doesn't belong to people who are avoiding their problems. It belongs to people who are trying, hard, to fix themselves.

03/23/2026

There’s a quiet ache we have many names for — anxiety, depression, disconnection — but often it’s loss of community. In my latest post, we explore how disconnection shapes our inner pain and practical steps toward rebuilding belonging.

03/09/2026

You are not a symptom. Explore why mental health care should consider the full human experience, not just isolated symptoms. Read my latest post about rethinking what rigorous care can, and should, look like.


https://wix.to/NJee3KP

This is the argument for a holistic approach to mental health: not as a soft alternative to rigorous care, but as the more accurate account of what a human being actually is.

03/02/2026

What are the invisible “if-then” rules that shape how you feel and act? My latest blog breaks down emotional schemas—how they form, how they express themselves in our behaviour, how they live in the body, and practical steps to notice and change them.

Emotional schemas are implicit learnings—"if-then" rules encoded in emotional memory—that predict what will happen if we do certain things. They're not thoughts we consciously believe. They're felt truths that live in our bodies and guide our behaviour automatically.

02/23/2026

What if our default story about human nature is wrong—and that shift could transform mental health? My latest blog post explores Rutger Bregman’s "Humankind" and what a more hopeful view of people means for mental health, relationships, and who we believe we are.

What if everything you've been taught about human nature is wrong? What if the cynicism baked into our institutions, our media, our parenting, and even our therapy models is based on a fundamental misunderstanding of who we are? These are the questions Rutger Bregman tackles in his book Humankind: A...

02/09/2026

Beyond “Me” to “We” — a deep read of Terry Real’s "Us" and how we can move from toxic individualism to more loving, resilient relationships. Explore practical insights for couples and clinicians, and why connection requires moving past blame to mutual accountability in my latest post.

Terry Real's book Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship offers a radical challenge to how we've been taught to think about relationships, mental health, and personal growth in contemporary Western culture.

01/26/2026

A thoughtful look at Kasia Urbaniak’s Unbound and what it teaches us about gender, desire, and authentic agency. My latest post explores the ideas she presents about how out internalized frameworks shape our power and what practices may help us to reclaim it.

Kasia Urbaniak's Unbound: A Woman's Guide to Power is one of those rare books that makes you realize how deeply you've internalized frameworks that work against you. Drawing from her unusual background as both a Taoist nun and a professional do******ix, Urbaniak offers a radical reimagining of power...

01/20/2026

What we believe about people affects their behaviour—and ours. Take a look at my latest blog post on understanding the "nocebo" effect and how it influences our reality.


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What we believe about people becomes how people behave, including ourselves. This is the nocebo effect writ large, and understanding it might be one of the most important mental health interventions available to us.

01/12/2026

Intellectualization is one way we protect ourselves from emotional pain, but it can keep us stuck in a cage. Ready to free yourself? Ready my latest post about how to face the things that can feel impossible to confront.

Intellectualization—one of the most socially acceptable and often invisible ways we protect ourselves from emotional pain.

01/05/2026

Have you ever confused boundaries with limits? Terry Real's insightful framework helps you protect yourself without controlling others. A summary of his framework and some practical examples and applications are in my latest post.

One of the most misunderstood concepts in contemporary therapy culture is boundaries. Everyone talks about them, books are written about them, social media is full of boundary-setting advice. But much of what gets called "boundary-setting" is actually something else entirely—and the confusion caus...

12/17/2025

If you've been impacted by Complex PTSD or attachment trauma, Stephanie Foo’s memoir, "What My Bones Know" offers insightful reflections and shared experiences, along with a realistic and hopeful outlook for the future.

There are certain books that don't just tell a story—they hold up a mirror. Stephanie Foo's memoir, What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma, is one of those rare works that manages to be both deeply personal and universally resonant for anyone who has lived with Complex PTSD or...