Mia Logie Therapeutic Counselling

01/01/2025

Happy New Year!! 🥂💫🌺

Feeling very proud this is how I started mine!! 2 minutes, yay!

Below is a guide to doing your own! I would not have made it unless I had two motivators with me, and they started in for 12 minutes!!

10/03/2024

Been a long time since I wrote a blog! Here is one that might be helpful for parents and caretakers of ND kids, and for those who wonder if their brains may be differently wired!

Neurodiversity Neurodivergent (ND) Neurotypical (NT) AuDHD ND-affirmative Self-diagnosis Late-diagnosed Masking Ableism Internalised ableism Invisible disability Variable ability Rejection sensitivity Demand avoidance Autism ADHD PDA Gifted female-presenting CPS Self-reg Disordered eating ARFID

02/26/2024

Thoughts from the teenage soup kitchen:

This past year I have had the pleasure of hosting up to a dozen kids for lunch Monday through Friday. I get to see my kids and their friends as they move through high school. It has been a huge support for my youngest as he has adjusted to the independence and responsibilities that come with this territory. These are two things that I have learned.

1. You don’t have to be a cool parent. The don’t want someone to get involved in their business. They just want an adult that is available when they need something, and that cares and notices and may anticipate what they mau not know themselves. So my ability to be a fly on the wall come in rather handy ;D There is no need to entertain. Doing so probably would make them feel less comfortable.

2. Most of them want carbs and cheese (and the ones that don’t bring their own food). I have become an expert at quickly dishing out grilled cheese sandwiches, or a large pot of mac n’ cheese. Fresh is best. If they can also charge their phones you have pretty much fulfilled all the teenage needs on the Maslow’s hierarchy :D

Next year I’m hoping to phase down the actual making of food to save myself some time. We’ll see how it goes! For now I am enjoying the priceless witnessing of them in their friend habitat!

06/21/2022

12/07/2020

This is such a beautiful video on adolescence! It came to me through a training I am doing on family therapy. It shows the different perrspectives we come to as parents and teens, and how when we can let that go and see what the other is facing, we can just be with and support each other!

Clinicians Ben Taussig and Vanessa Knight, as well as colleague in graduate school who wishes to be unnamed, created this piece as an educational capstone pr...

09/15/2020

I can not say I have been a huge fan of Pink’s music. I do love her voice and what she stands for. This is a beautiful sentiment on relationship and the work it can take to stay together. Real, honest and authentic.

My friend took this photo of us. He’s still my favorite sweet little dirtball. He and I have been at this a long time, and it is our relentless and stubborn idealism that keeps us together.
Marriage is awful, wonderful, comfort and rage.
It is boring, terrifying, and a total nail biter.
It is loving another fallible creature while trying to love yourself.
It is a lifetime of coming back to the table. People laugh at us because we’re either fighting or laughing. They roll their eyes when we talk about therapy.
But I’ll tell you what. It’s worth it.
All of it.
Even when it isn’t. Therapy isn’t for weak people or hippies or liberals. It’s for broken people that want to be whole. It’s for runaways that want a family. It’s a lesson on how to sit down and listen. How to love yourself so that the other person can, too. I love you babe. I’m grateful we made it to this photo

06/20/2020

Sometimes life gets overwhelming. We may be coming up against major challenges. It may feel like no one has our back.

When we open up our emotional underbelly it is important that we pace the process, and feel supported in it. This is where your therapist will help you. Avoiding too much, too soon. Ensuring that we have built in a supportive connection in the relationship. Creating and facilitating structures and relationships that you can turn to for support.

06/17/2020

Just because!

What are your ways of celebrating? Of caring for self or rejoicing in the gifts you are blessed with? Of showing those you care about how much they mean to you?

Traditionally I think of celebrating as throwing a party, and of caring as gifts and birthdays. But I have noticed that I often care for others by listening to who they are and what they care about.

Caring for me means listening to what I need, and what I care about. Sometimes if I have been overworked I need to just zone out and watch stuff. Or rest in the company of someone I where I don’t need to ‘be something’, where I can just be me.

One of my most energizing and self loving practices is sound. To engage in drumming, singing or dance. Playfully, without expectation on a specific outcome. Just because I can, and it brings me joy. This brings me a real inner sense of celebration.

What works for you?

05/30/2020

Trauma is not the determined by an event. Two people can be in the exact same event and one can develop trauma from it while the other does not. It has nothing to do with strength. It is feeling alone with it that has the biggest impact on whether it is resolved or not.

When we are left alone with a difficult experience it actually changes the wiring of our brain. This wiring leaves us tending to hyper vigilance, and more susceptible to stress and further trauma. With the proper treatment those brain changes can be healed.

Having someone that hears and sees the impact on us, acknowledges that it wasn’t our fault, and responds in a way that honours our humanity, this is is when we heal. This builds resilience. This rebuilds trust - in ourselves, in people, in the world. In that environment we can overcome any adversity. It doesn’t have to be with the person we experienced the hurt with, but when it does we can heal the relationship injury with them.

Undoing aloneness to heal trauma means recognizing when someone is in pain and need company. Sometimes this someone is ourselves.
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05/17/2020

When a couple comes to me - or people in any kind of relationship - I primarily see the relationship. Yes they are two individuals, each with their own set of baggage they bring to the relationship. But more than that, they form a unique new entity together. There is a third body present in the session, and that body is the relationship.

There is certain kind of beauty that arises when we honour this body. Soft, tender, sweet, delicate, pure and open. It allows for another kind of listening, filled with curiosity and caring. It reminds me of when we care for a newborn. Someone innocent and unconditionally deserving of our love.

This well-being of this body is felt by both parts, and is highly dependent on what both parts put into it. If we love this body generously and trust it, it will grow confident and support both individuals to grow. If we are afraid and mistrusting, it will shiver and become small, and it will fill us with doubt.

I do not advocate to trust blindly. Sometimes it is appropriate not to trust. And when we can fill this body with love and trust, and work our way through the hick-ups that show up along the way, there is a sweetness available like no other.
I believe Van Morrison called it Tupelo honey.

My job as a relationship therapist is to bring this body into focus.
xo

05/15/2020

I love rhythm. It brings me joy and it helps to synchronize me with others. When I know what tune someone is dancing to I can easily join them.
I don’t have to dance the same way. It doesn’t have to look good. I may miss the beat at times. There is joy in sharing something together, such as eye contact, smiling and the joy of movement.

Structure on the other hand is not something that comes easily to me. I love being able to follow the flow and listen to my body for when I am ready for something. I often wish for someone else to create the structure, the framework that I can create within.

I am learning from having my kids home during school hours is that good habits and good structure requires less energy of me. There is not a constant flow of small decisions that need to be made. The kids know what to expect, so they sometimes don’t even whine about it. Instead I can focus my mental energy on what matters.
When my structure is clear to others, it is easier for them to join me. It creates a framework for mutual goals, such as spending time together or achieving something with a colleague. When both of our rhythms are clear we can find a way to join, playfully.

05/12/2020

She went over and pulled these beauties off the bush as we walked by. My son and I had played with another neighbour’s dog up the street. By now I had learnt to pick up her subtle body language. She wanted me to have them ❤️ My heart warmed. The flowers were beautiful and smelled amazing. The glistening in her eyes and her invitation to connect was pure and bloomed just as much as her garden. She proceeded to tell me how to cut the hazel seedling branches me and the kids had planted recently. Her caring seeped though in every word. This year we have lived 10 years on his street and I feel no judgement in her communication. She doesn’t want anything from me but being with me. It is a tender connection I will keep in my heart. She reminds me of my grandmother.

It would be easy for her to judge. We are an unconventional family. Our yard is messy, the moonflower has ruined my energy for gardening, our kids are noisy and sometimes brats. We don’t even drive fancy cars. We are two part-time single parents that for many years have been moving in and out of the house on a weekly basis to accommodate our kids’ need for stability. We are not the kind of a family most people dream of having next door.

It occurred to me that gardening is much like building trust. Nurturing, watering and waiting. Occasionally getting your hands dirty to make sure there is a solid foundation. Then, curiously watching as it grows to bloom.

Trust is at the core of relationships. It is the glue that makes the bond.

Later, when my son and I got back from a skateboard ride he had a sneezing fit as we walked by the table where the lilacs were. ‘Perhaps you are allergic to the flowers. Shall I take them outside?’ ‘No. Not yet.’ He sneezed again. We laughed. He loves flowers. I imagined that he also recognized them as the symbol of connection they were.