Humber Doula Services

06/08/2023

"Hold the mother, not the baby" 💥

Hold the mother, not the baby.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Because the baby’s being taken care of—⁣⁣
fed, snuggled, and given all the love in the world—⁣⁣
by not only the mother,⁣⁣
but her partner, grandparents, siblings, cousins, and friends.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
But the mother,⁣⁣
may have gaps in her mind from lack of sleep,⁣⁣
may be mechanical in her motions as she’s healing,⁣⁣
may feel more like a mess than a mother,⁣⁣
may be sitting in bed, crying, feeling overwhelmed in her body and life,⁣⁣
may be full of mom guilt because in her mind, "she's not good enough,"⁣⁣
and she’s bleeding, wincing in pain, swollen and emotional.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
And the mother’s that baby's whole world and needs to be seen, so she doesn't disappear into that postpartum fog.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
So, hold the mother, not the baby.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
A mother agrees that her baby matters more.⁣⁣
But she’s hurting, while she’s the person behind the baby,⁣⁣
in the background, making it all happen:⁣⁣
feeding her baby at all hours,⁣⁣
snuggling her baby close to comfort newborn cries,⁣⁣
and being that baby’s everything.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
So, it’s the mother who needs your love.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
And a mother will remember who held her up.⁣⁣
⁣⁣
So instead of “I’m coming to see the baby,”⁣⁣
try saying, “I’m coming to see you 𝘢𝘯𝘥 meet the baby, too.”⁣⁣
⁣
Because the mother needs to be held more.

Words: Living FULL

________________
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
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03/20/2023

The International Association of Professional Birth Photographers recently announced its 11th annual contest winners.

03/01/2023

NEW START DATE: Sunday, 5 March 2023
Join me this winter for Prenatal Yoga .breathe.grow Yoga Studio ❤️
What to expect: Weekly themes related to pregnancy and child birth, traditional movement exercises, yoga postures, and breathwork plus meditations and relaxation to support you on your childbearing journey 🤰❤️
DM or contact me via the deets on the post to sign up 🧘‍♀️🙏

11/12/2022

100%!

(As someone who's raised 3 into adulthood and couldn't be closer to them), please don't buy into all those guilt-inducing "you'd better savor every moment" messages out there!

11/10/2022

"I miss you"

Three words that came out of Sam's mouth that nearly broke me.

We were deep in the trenches of first time parenthood, and I was struggling. Struggling with the transition to motherhood, with the intense loss of identity I felt, and the torturous sleep deprivation that had turned me into a walking zombie.

But I hadn't thought about how my husband was feeling. We often forget the dads.

Sam was struggling in his own way. Parenthood was a huge adjustment for him and his world also got flipped upside down.

I remember the moment he told me he missed me three and a half years ago. Every detail. I remember where we were and what we were wearing.

I felt so guilty. I was so caught up in 'me', that I'd forgotten about him.

We had a bit of a cry before I whispered back,
"I miss you too" 💗

We've had each other's back ever since, and I wouldn't be the mum I am now without his support, and he wouldn't be the dad he is without mine.

So thank you to my rock, my love, my world. What a ride this thing called parenthood has been.

Today is Day 5 of Perinatal Mental Health Week, and it's about acknowledging the dads and non-birthing partners who struggle too. Around 1 in 10 dads suffer from perinatal depression and anxiety, and don't get me started on the work we need to do to shatter the stigma that still surrounds men being emotional and vulnerable.

Rural dads. All dads. We love you 💗

Steph x
Founder & CEO, Motherland

Perinatal Mental Health Week
Gidget Foundation

08/04/2022

And this is why I offer fourth trimester support. Weekly check-ins for venting, information, what the heck is going on, a neutral chat 💛

Moms never stop needing support.

When she first has her baby, the support floods in from everywhere.

But then, after that first few weeks, everyone seems to disappear.

The texts checking in
stop.

The offers to babysit so she can take a nap
disappear.

But mommy never stops needing support.

She needs someone to call when she’s on the bathroom floor, face streaked with tears.

She needs someone she can vent to after she deals with an epic tantrum in the grocery store and someone criticizes her parenting.

Not just the beginning, but moms need someone to place them gently back on their feet through all phases of motherhood.
To calm their fears.
To tell them they’re doing a good job.

Because the reality is,
motherhood gets harder and harder.

And she can use someone to hold her hand and tell her they’ve been there and know how frustrating it is to fold laundry and cook dinner when she’s sick,
or to receive a hard diagnosis,
or how difficult the first-time separating is.

And she doesn’t need anyone to step in and do it for her,
she just needs the emotional support.

All moms do.

Because mothers who do that for everyone else deserve to be comforted, too.

So don’t forget to check on her,
Moms never stop needing support.

📸: Amanda Oleander Art
Beautiful Words By Living FULL

07/24/2022

Just need to say it over and over....it's biologically normal for babies to nurse for comfort.

We need to change our thinking around this. Babies were comfort nursing longggg before pacifiers existed.

So babies aren’t using you as a pacifier. They’re using pacifiers as you.

And I’m not hating on pacis - I’m simply trying to adjust our outlook on comfort nursing.

There’s a reason why babies have a strong instinct to suckle - its biologically normal to nurse for comfort.

Background b**b art by my dear friend,