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Joanne Fearns - Healing out Loud -

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Point Edward, ON
Joanne Fearns - Healing out Loud -

Trauma Educated Speaker | Educator | Advocate |
Founder
Health Coach & Crisis Responder
Healing out loud - Raw, real healing

01/30/2026

The cost of being seen is something we don’t talk about enough. When you grow up in chaos or suppressive control, being visible isn’t safe — it’s risky.

So you learn to do it all yourself.
💔 You learn to shrink.
💔 You learn to ‘make it work’ yourself.
💔 You learn to ‘make do’ instead of asking for more.
💔 You learn to deflect praise.
💔 You learn 1000 skills so that you don’t have to ask for help.
💔 You learn to read rooms like your life depends on it (because once, it did).

And then, one day you’re out of the environment, but the habits come with you. People call them “issues” or “patterns” or “walls.”

They’re not flaws. They’re receipts.

They are proof of what you survived.

But they’re there, whether you can recognize them yet or not. What you went through isn’t your fault, but this, the after? It’s your responsibility- and, no, it’s not fair. It’s not fair that you have to fix what you didn’t break, but you deserve to let people love you, and care for you (and come change your light bulb that has been out for six months because you don’t know how to fix it yourself yet 🤷🏻‍♀️)

Healing isn’t about shaming these parts out of you.
It’s about thanking them… and teaching them that you’re safe now.

As I write this, I need you to know that this message is for me just as much as it is for you. It’s a reminder to myself that those walls are still there and those insecurities still like to show up at the most in opportune time 🫠. As much as it sucks some days - I’m going to keep working on me.

If this hit, you’re not broken — you’re adaptive.
And you don’t have to disappear anymore to be okay.

01/29/2026

This is your reminder:

Losing people after setting boundaries doesn’t mean you did it wrong.

It means the relationship was only possible without them.
And that hurts — even when it’s necessary.

I see you.
I’m proud of you.
And I’m sorry it hurts.

01/26/2026

Yes. I am fully aware that sometimes *I am* the problem.

ADHD brains need logic
trauma brains need control
…and hyper-independent black cat energy doesn’t do ‘because I said so.’

Sometimes that’s self-protection… and sometimes I’m the problem that needs to be addressed 🤷🏻‍♀️

01/19/2026

I didn’t yell.

I was working from home, minding my business, when my cats apparently decided they were powered by jet fuel. Full chaos. Zoomies. Tiny furry terrorists with a mission.

Then I heard it.
A crash.
The unmistakable sound of something breaking.

And here’s the thing — I didn’t jump. I didn’t feel that spike of fear. I paused, looked up, and thought, okay… something bad just happened.

I walked over and saw it:
End table knocked over.
Garbage can broken.
Air purifier down.
Bottom half of my bookshelf? Absolutely wrecked.

And I stopped — because I didn’t yell.

I checked the cats first. Were they okay? Yes.
Then I looked at the mess and went, well sh*t… this is annoying.

And I started picking things up. Piece by piece.

I didn’t yell.
I didn’t scream.
I didn’t threaten.
I didn’t react.

I shook my head and thought, wow… this sucks.

And then it hit me.

I responded.

Healing shows up in the most random moments. Sometimes it looks like realizing your response didn’t match the reactions you grew up with or got used to seeing. Sometimes healing is the pause. The regulation. The ability to respond instead of explode.

I didn’t yell.

And that mattered more than the mess. 🤍

01/16/2026

Be proud of all that you’ve done.

Of who you are.

Of everything that you choose to do and be IN SPITE OF those who hurt you.

K, love you, bye 💋

01/10/2026

Welcome to my new series - that does not have a name yet - but will be about us talking about the really crappy things that we’re now unlearning because of not-so-great parents or legal guardians.

- You’re not alone
- It’s okay that you may not fully understand the impact of their actions, it’s not your fault.
- You get to decide what you’re healing looks like and there’s no ‘right’ way to heal.
- You are welcome here.

Shout out to for my favorite mask 💋

01/09/2026

Soooo I have this app that sends me little, daily motivations.

At first I was defiantly feeling the corny factor (cause what’s better to deflect self care than making your supportive actions look/feel small eh??)

Anywho I promised myself I would look at them no matter what, EVERYTIME they popped up on my screen.

Cue like, 3 months later and it’s now a habit that will either bring a smile to my face OR make my pause and go “well, sh*t”

Not sure who might need to see this message today, but I hope it creates a pause in your scrolling and either smile or say “well, sh*t”.

K, love you, bye 💋

01/02/2026

Raise your hand if you had a little 🎶 menty b 🎶 in your vehicle today 🙋🏻‍♀️

Because… same.

To be fair, mine started in a coffee shop. Then I told myself to get it together — which, as we all know, always works 🙄

But once I got home and sat in my truck, parked in my own driveway, it all came out. Everything I’d been holding in all day finally had somewhere to land.

I even laughed at myself (because I’m hilarious) and wondered:

How many times have my neighbours watched me have a full breakdown in this truck?

How many times have they looked out their window and seen me crying?

How many times have they wondered why it took me 30 minutes to park and go inside?

Realistically, they probably haven’t noticed a thing. But it made me pause and ask myself:
How many times have I done this? And why is my vehicle the place where I finally feel safe enough to fall apart?

So this is me saying this out loud — for accountability, and because I know I’m not alone.

If this resonates with you and your black cat energy…
If your car is your safe space to let it out before you mask up and walk into work or home…

Maybe we make a pact?
That we slowly, gently work on trusting one safe person.
That we practice saying how we’re actually feeling.
That we give ourselves permission — even when it’s uncomfortable — to let someone else in, so it doesn’t feel quite so heavy.

K, love you, bye 💋

12/30/2025

A LOT this “become a whole new person overnight” messaging can be harmful AF.

Transparency - you can bet your sweet little bottom I’ve fallen prey to it time and time again ( I think we all know I wasn’t going to give up Diet Coke 🙄)

BUTTT what these trends do is quietly and systematically teach us that who we are right now isn’t good enough — that we need fixing, shrinking, or reinventing to be worthy.

That’s not motivation. That’s shame. And shame doesn’t create change.

It does however create burnout, avoidance, and that constant feeling of never being enough 🫠

Real, sustainable growth doesn’t come from hating yourself into submission. No one has ever hated themselves into loving themselves.

Change that lasts comes from compassion, safety, and learning how to support your nervous system — not punish it.

So when your feed starts filling up with extreme resolutions, before-and-afters, and “this is the year I finally fix myself” energy, here are a few gentle ways to support yourself:

👉 Mute or unfollow what feels dysregulating
👉 Notice comparison without piling on judgment
👉 Come back to what helps you feel grounded
👉 Choose curiosity over punishment
👉 Talk about it - we are over the people we love suffering in silence.
👉 Sit with what comes up when you think of the shifts that you would like to see and make realistic, loving goals to make those happen - and friends, use your resources.

Healing, growth, and change don’t require a specific date. They don’t require you hating who you are now or turning into someone new. You’re allowed to grow as you are, at your own pace.

You don’t need a new year to become worthy — you already are. 🤍

K, love you, bye 💋

12/29/2025

My mental-health non-negotiable: a daily shower.

Not for hygiene (okay well yes cause smelling like vanilla is better than onions…) but for regulation.

It’s a consistent, sensory reset that helps signal safety to my nervous system and brings me back into my body.

A therapist taught me years ago to choose one daily anchor — something predictable you do no matter how the day goes.

This is mine, even if I put the same pyjamas back on or live in a towel and robe until the heaviness passes.

So here’s my challenge to you:
What’s one daily non-negotiable you can commit to that helps you stay regulated and makes you a priority?

K, love you, bye 💋

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805 Christina Street N. , Unit 103
Point Edward, ON

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Thursday	10am - 6am
Friday	12pm - 6pm
Saturday	10am - 5pm

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