10/27/2025
There are many misconceptions about healing work that patients might bring to their session. Allow me to bring some clarity.
1. “The therapist will figure this out for me”. The therapist is a skilled mediator, negotiator and facilitator. Even when the therapist has special assessment or intuitive skill, the patient still needs to acknowledge, accept and transform what needs healing most, which might not be what the patient expected (especially when the treatment focus was on the physical body).
2. “I feel better so I am healed”. This might be true, or this might be a stage of temporary relief. A change in symptoms can be a good thing, but this isn’t always an indication that the pattern fueling the problem has been addressed. Dysfunction that is missed or avoided can show up in different ways. This is why we ask so many questions.
3. “The therapist doesn’t need to know about “X””.A skilled therapist knows more about you than you think. When you omit crucial information for whatever reason (forgot, don’t think it’s important, are ashamed to disclose, etc) it is likely to arise during a session in some way at some time. Feeling safe to disclose information is integral to healing, and every moment of your life experience matters.
4. “Healing will bring me peace”. Perhaps, but before peace arrives we must let go of what is causing us to feel anxious, restless, angry or distracted. This might be difficult or take some time to work through. Healing is a process, not a destination, and something must be sacrificed or resolved in order to create space for peace. We also need to learn what peace feels like for us.
Healing work can go fast or slow depending on many factors. Timing is everything, and it helps to consider practical things like financial, work and relational obligations and supports. There’s no one way to work with suffering. Choose what suits you and what you’re willing to engage honestly with.
Thanks for reading.
Nancy