Alex Wallis Psychotherapy

05/12/2024

Mother’s Day is not just a celebration, but also a day in which many people experience heavy grief.
It has been a privilege of mine to work with mothers in all different stages of life and experiences.
Those who have living children, those who have lost children at many stages and in a multitude of ways, those who don’t know their birth mothers, those who are raising children who are not biologically theirs, those who have yet to experience being a mother, those who don’t want to be a mother, those who grieve the relationship they have or had with their mother, and those who are experience difficulty being a mother. I see all of you.
I have learned so much from my clients and hold heavy gratitude for each one of them.
Thank you to each individual I have come across and yet to meet who has the bravery to share their story with me and trust in me to hold them through multitudes of complex experiences surrounding motherhood.
I will be ever grateful and privileged to be a small part of your journey.

Sending so much love to all today. 💗

04/02/2024

Hiii! 👋🏻 it’s been a while.
The last 9 months have been majorly focused on building my practice in authentic and relational ways - outside of the online space. This time was also filled with significant self growth and my own therapeutic experiences to better show up in all areas of my life!
I figured out that Instagram was taking too much of the energy that was needed elsewhere & refocused.
I am excited to start sharing with you again, without aesthetic, planning & organization on this online space! I will be focused solely around authentic connection and sharing topics that are on my mind. ✨💗

06/01/2023

June is Pride month!!! The month where I have the privilege of overtly celebrating some of my very favourite humans.
It’s an acknowledgement of the growth the LGBTQ+ community has achieved, but also acknowledging the very intense hardships and violence they still experience every single day.
Pride month is necessary, especially this year, where we see a very direct and loud attack on trans individuals and drag queens for just existing.
This year it’s even more important to educate yourself around the intensity of what is going on here in Canada and how the actions of our border country have a direct impact on the safety of our loved ones here.
I love and care for you all endlessly.
Ps. If I could put a song over this post it would be ‘born naked’ bc RU is the queen. But Instagram and is silly and doesn’t let business accounts use normal music lol.

05/05/2023

Let's talk trauma in our bodies.​​​​​​​​​Yes. It is true, trauma shows up in our bodies.
This may sound a bit odd, but out bodies and brains are absolutely interconnected.
Much of the time trauma can be stored in our jaws, shoulder, and lower back (hips). Mainly because these are the areas that we carry most of our tension.
When individuals come to me with a trauma history, it is important for me to inquire about bodily pain and continue to assess how it is showing up in their bodies.
What I have found is that the more trauma individuals seem to release and place nicely into folders where they no longer cause activation, the less pain and tension they carry in their bodies.
How neat. It is astonishing to me how interconnected our entire system is.
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05/05/2023

One thing I come across often is the fear, concern, or hurt that others are uncomfortable around you speaking about your child who has died. Whether this experience was a miscarriage, stillbirth, abortion, or early life loss. ​​​​​​​​​You deserve to speak about your experience. To mourn your loss with others. To celebrate your child in whatever way you feel most at peace with.
Often it feels lonely. Isolating. Like no one understands. Many times this can leave us feeling like we can't talk about it. That others have moved on, and they are forgetting what happened. But you didn't.
You deserve and have the permission to continue to talk about your child. You deserve to find ways to include your child in your daily life if that feels right for you, no matter what others think.
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05/05/2023

I haven't spoke much about domestic violence on here, but is one of the populations of clients that I hold dear to my heart. ​​​​​​​​​Domestic violence comes in all shapes and forms.
Sometimes it can be very easy to spot, but often is very quiet and hard to notice.
Domestic violence and abuse is not an individual struggle, but rather one that is upheld by so many systems, socializations, and stigmas in our society.
As an intersectional feminist therapist, it is part of my role to recognize the role our system has on domestic violence.
This comes in the form of education, individual work, questioning the system and actively creating change in our communities.
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04/12/2023

Reminder that active productivity is rooted in our capitalist society keeping us exhausted so we continue on the wheel of work and no play.​​​​​​​​​ Rest is productive. It is useful. It is not lazy.
Your body deserves rest and care.
Self care is often doing the hard things, like rest in a busy society.
How many of us were told we were lazy for wanting to take a nap, or that others are more valuable because they wake up at 4am to workout and start their day and don't stop until 9pm.
This is great if it works for them, but worth is not dependent on how actively productive we are.
It is important to treat our bodies with respect. Often that means taking time to rest.
This may look like taking a nap, watching a movie, zoning out for an hour on tik tok, taking a slow walk, reading a book, meditating, stretching, gardening, and anything else that makes you feel at peace.
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04/06/2023

Relationships are complicated.​​​​​​​​​Most are filled with complexity from what we bring from our childhoods and family of origin.
There will always be struggles in relationships, this is not a surprise when two people are coming together with completely different life experiences trying to merge into one.
Although, there are many red flags to pay attention to when it comes to a relationship.
And no, I don't mean things like 'my partner follows other girls on Instagram' and 'my partner doesn't want to spend every day with me' - these are much more complicated attachment struggles we have personally that often have little to do with our partner.
What I am talking about are deep rooted emotional struggles that can lead to highly toxic and sometimes abusive situations.
What I have learned is that many individuals see abuse as 'physical' and it seems unclear what abuse actually looks like. Here's a few that can possibly predict an emotionally harmful environment for yourself in a relationship.
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04/02/2023

I often come across so many sayings and quotes that unintentionally create shame. ​​​​​​​​​Most of these are affirmations around toxic positivity like 'positive vibes only' 'don't sweat the small stuff' and 'no more negative thinking'.
As a trauma informed therapist, I know this is WAY harder than just that.
It is important to recognize that the human experience is complex. That we all feel a wide range of emotions and all are valid.
It's these toxic positivity quotes that keep us in the loop of shame and breed disconnection. It creates this notion that if you don't have anything positive to bring, you aren't welcome.
But you are welcome. You are welcome to express yourself, your struggles, and all the things that you may feel are 'unattractive' to others. Vulnerability breeds connection.
Life without true connection is lonely. Lets be more curious and practice our empathy with others.
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03/23/2023

03/23/2023

Self Worth.​​​​​​​​​ It feels loaded.
Like we all are expected to have it.
But how the heck do I fully embrace it?
It feels so complicated. And it is. It's intertwined with all of the experiences throughout our lives that have shaped us into the human we are today.
But I wanted to give you my coles notes on self worth and how to achieve it.
But also wanted to remind you it's not this easy. It takes work, exploration, and a lot of hard s**t to really feel it.
I know you can get there though.
You've got this.
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