Crossroads Therapeutic Solutions

09/15/2025

We all seek and desire connection 💗

A bid for connection is what Drs. John and Julie Gottman call any attempt or gesture to positively connect with a partner. A bid can be for the purpose of comfort, affection, attention, affirmation, humor, etc.
There are three ways we can respond to a bid:

1. Turning away: missing or ignoring a bid. This is when we don’t hear the bid, don’t recognize the bid, or ignore the bid. Repeated missed bids for connection create problems in relationships.

2. Turning against: rejecting a bid or responding in a negative way. This is another hurtful way to respond to a bid. It can send the message to the bidder that what they need is not important.

3. Turning towards: acknowledging or responding to a bid in a positive way. This doesn’t mean that we should drop everything and fulfill every bid that comes our way. It means that we can respond to a bid with kindness and send the message that the bidder’s needs matter.

Here’s an example:

Bid for affection: “Come cuddle with me.”

Turning away: *no response, ignore, or walk away*

Turning against: “Can’t you see I’m busy?”

Turning towards: “I’m just finishing up what I’m doing, sweetheart, and then I’ll come cuddle with you. Give me about 5 minutes.” Or, “I’d love to cuddle with you, sweetheart, but now isn’t a good time for me. Can we make some time to do that after dinner?”

The Gottmans conducted a study with newlyweds and then followed up with them 6 years later. What they found was that the couples who were still together at the 6-year follow-up turned towards each other 86% of the time. Couples who had divorced turned towards each other 33% of the time.

Turning towards is key. 🔑

Bids also extend to other relationships as well. You can look for bids from family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, etc.

To read more about bids for connection, check out the blog.

Disclaimer: Content is for educational purposes and doesn’t constitute therapy. Posts are generalized and may not fit all individuals or situations. My posts don’t speak to situations of abuse, active addiction, or certain mental health conditions.

09/07/2025

Welcoming Certified Canadian Counsellor, Nancy Kearnan, to our team. Appointments available weekdays and evenings and as early as next day. Please visit our website at crossroadstherapy.ca to find out about Nancy and our other counsellors or call us at 306-665-6661 to book an appointment.

08/24/2025

The FASD Network will be hosting walks in Saskatoon & Regina on September 9th to raise awareness for Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder.

08/06/2025

Crossroads is excited to welcome Nancy Kearnan to our team of therapists. Nancy is a Certified Canadian Counsellor who comes with a wealth of experience and knowledge supporting individuals, couples and families. Weekday/evening appointments available immediately.

Crossroads Therapeutic Solutions is a partnership of highly skilled and experienced psychologists and social workers located in the Broadway area. Call us today to schedule an appointment.

07/14/2025

Help start the conversation

06/21/2025

Today we celebrate Indigenous people in Canada.

05/18/2025

Exciting news, Jane has released a mobile app for clients! It allows clients to use one Jane account across multiple clinics. It also allows clients to join their online sessions with one click in the app.

05/08/2025

Today we say goodbye to a very special soul - Ruby, our beloved therapy dog, who brought comfort, courage, and countless tail wags to so many hearts. Her gentle presence had a way of making even the hardest days a little softer.

She wasn’t just a dog - she was a healer, a listener, a friend. She sat in our laps like she belonged there (because she did) and snuck kisses even when she wasn’t “supposed to”. We always let her - because somehow she knew exactly when someone needed it most. Her paw prints will be forever etched in the hearts of those she helped.

To her devoted human, Dr. Darlene Chalmers, - our hearts are with you. Thank you for sharing Ruby’s light with us. We send you love, gratitude, and gentle hugs as you grieve the loss of your beautiful partner.

Rest easy, sweet Ruby. You did your job so well. ❤️🐶🌈

05/06/2025

Fifteen years ago, Red River Métis artist, Jaime Black-Morsette, began displaying red dresses in public spaces to honour the lives of Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women, Girls, and Two Spirit people (MMIWG2S+). The REDress Project, was more than an art installation, it was a call to mourning, a call to ceremony, and a call to action. It is now known as Red Dress Day, a national call for justice.

For many Indigenous families, Red Dress Day isn’t about recognition, but deep grief. Behind every red dress is someone loved, someone missed, someone still not home.

The voices of grieving mothers, grown daughters, sisters, and children of missing and murdered First Nations, Métis, and Inuit women and girls ring out daily, and their demands for justice for their loved ones are the driving force of this movement.

This Red Dress Day, we invite you to learn how missing and murdered Indigenous women, girls, and Two Spirit people are being honoured in First Nations, Inuit, and Métis communities near you, and how you can show up in ways that reflect care, respect, and commitment.

04/15/2025

04/10/2025

We want to present another local artist whose art is on display at Crossroads Therapeutic Solutions. Meet Cindy Wright

04/06/2025

See local talent when you come into Crossroads Therapeutic Solutions. Featuring Kathryn Gorectke Art

https://kathryngorectkeart.wordpress.com/