Mind Always Matters

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04/17/2026

Limerence isn’t just a crush… it’s an attachment wound in disguise.

It’s thinking about them constantly.
Replaying conversations.
Checking your phone.
Feeling a high when they respond… and a drop when they don’t.

It feels intense for a reason.

This isn’t just about the person.
It’s about what they represent.

For many, limerence is rooted in anxious attachment and early emotional experiences where love felt inconsistent, uncertain, or something you had to earn.

So your nervous system learned to hold on… tightly.

They become more than a person.
They become validation.
Hope.
Relief.
The feeling of finally being chosen.

And that’s why it’s so hard to let go.

Because you’re not just attached to them —
you’re attached to what your mind believes they will fix or complete within you.

The cycle continues:
you long for them, idealize them, wait for them, overanalyze everything…
hoping the next moment with them will finally settle something inside.

But it doesn’t last.

Because limerence isn’t asking, “Do I love this person?”
It’s asking, “Why does this feel like it has the power to make me feel whole?”

Healing begins when you gently turn inward.

Not with shame.
But with curiosity.

What feels familiar here?
What am I really seeking from them?
What part of me feels unseen, unchosen, or unsafe?

Sometimes, the work isn’t letting go of the person.

It’s understanding the wound that made you hold on this tightly.

selfawareness

03/09/2025

Ever heard the phrase, “Once bitten, twice shy”? That’s generalization in action. It’s our mind’s way of keeping us safe, but sometimes, it holds us back.

Take this example—a cat burns its tongue on hot milk once. From then on, it avoids anything that looks like white liquid, even if it’s cold. We do the same in life.

• One tough presentation? “I’m terrible at public speaking.”
• One mistake at work? “I always mess things up.”
• One social slip-up? “People must think I’m awkward.”

But one bad experience doesn’t mean all future ones will be the same. Next time you catch yourself making sweeping conclusions, pause and ask:
✔️ Is this always true?
✔️ What’s the real evidence?
✔️ Would I say this to a friend?

Breaking free from generalization helps us see life as it really is—full of opportunities to grow.

01/05/2025

Let’s talk about a topic that often gets overlooked but is crucial for a healthy marriage: s*xual intimacy.

S*x is not just about the physical connection—it is deeply emotional, mental, and even spiritual. However, research shows that s*xual concerns are among the leading causes of divorce. When physical intimacy struggles, it is rarely just about s*x. It often reflects challenges in communication, trust, and emotional vulnerability.

Healthy s*xual intimacy is foundational to achieving your marriage goals. Why? Because it:
✨ Strengthens emotional and relational bonds.
✨ Reduces stress and fosters a deeper connection.
✨ Reinforces trust and the feeling of being desired.

Conversations about this topic can feel uncomfortable, but they are absolutely necessary. If you or your partner are struggling with this aspect of your relationship, opening up the dialogue is the first step. Seeking support from a therapist or counselor can also be a game-changer.

Remember, a healthy marriage is built on mutual effort, understanding, and vulnerability. Investing in your intimacy is investing in your relationship.

Let’s keep normalizing these conversations to strengthen relationships and foster deeper connections.

11/01/2024

Imposter syndrome often runs much deeper than a simple lack of confidence in your skills. It’s a response from your body—a physical and emotional reaction stemming from early experiences where rejection, criticism, or harm became part of your story.

Imagine this: you’re sitting in a meeting or starting a new project, and suddenly, you feel that familiar tightening in your chest or the self-doubt creeping in. It’s not that you lack expertise or ability. Instead, your body remembers a time when stepping forward was met with negative feedback or even hurtful consequences.

Understanding imposter syndrome as a response to past experiences, rather than a reflection of current skills, opens up a powerful shift. It allows us to begin acknowledging these feelings without giving them power. We can slowly teach ourselves, ‘I am safe to be seen,’ ‘I have earned my seat at this table,’ and ‘I am capable.’

If this resonates, you’re not alone. Learning to recognize and work through these feelings can make a world of difference, not just for career growth but for personal well-being. How do you navigate feelings of imposter syndrome in your field? Let’s share experiences and tips below—supporting each other in our journeys!

04/20/2024

Understanding the difference is crucial: Sadness is a moment, but depression lingers. 🌧️➡️🌑 Let’s learn more about recognizing and supporting mental health. ***de

02/03/2024

If you’re navigating the pain of loss and are in the process of grieving, we warmly invite you to join our group counselling session.

01/24/2024

“Putting Thoughts on Trial” is a cognitive technique designed to help individuals challenge and reassess their beliefs and perceptions, particularly those that may be distorted or irrational. This method is akin to a courtroom trial, where thoughts are examined and evaluated for their validity, much like evidence in a legal case.

The process begins with identifying a specific thought or belief that is causing distress or is unhelpful. Once identified, the individual gathers evidence both supporting and contradicting this belief, effectively ‘cross-examining’ their own thoughts. This step is crucial as it encourages a more objective view of one’s internal narrative.

The individual then critically evaluates this evidence, challenging the accuracy and rationality of the belief. This is similar to how a jury would weigh evidence in a trial. The goal is to consider alternative perspectives or interpretations that might be more aligned with the facts.

After thorough examination, a ‘verdict’ is reached about the belief’s validity. If found to be based more on distortion than reality, the individual works to replace it with a more rational, realistic thought. This step is crucial for cognitive restructuring, a key component in cognitive-behavioral therapy.

“Putting Thoughts on Trial” is a powerful tool in managing negative or unhelpful thought patterns, promoting mental wellbeing by fostering a more accurate and less biased understanding of one’s experiences and perceptions.

04/25/2023

Trauma bonding refers to a strong emotional attachment that forms between an individual and their abuser as a result of experiencing repeated traumatic events. This bond is typically characterized by a cycle of abuse, followed by periods of affection and kindness from the abuser, creating a pattern of dependency and attachment.

Symptoms of trauma include

1. Denial or cover up of the abuser's behavior
2. Lying to others about the abuse
3. Feeling unable to leave the abusive situation
4. Self-blame for the abuse
5. Cycle of abuse followed by apologies or promises to change
6.Manipulation and control by the abuser
7. Isolation from friends and family
8. Winning over friends and family to their side
9. Continued trust in the abuser despite the abuse

If you or someone you know is experiencing these symptoms, seeking counseling services can be a helpful step towards healing and breaking free from the cycle of abuse.

01/10/2023

Couldn't have asked for a better way to begin the year.

Conducted a workshop for a group of amazing the young adults of Watume Global Ministries. This photo does not do justice to the beautiful interactions we had while discussing childhood trauma and it’s manifestation.

The first step towards healing is being aware of what has happened and how it is (possibly) creating concerns in your life. This workshop threw light on the unresolved issues caused due to childhood emotional neglect, that required attention.

12/20/2022

The Cycle of Anxiety

The cycle of anxiety is a process where a person avoids their feelings or thoughts that creates distress in them, and as a result, those feelings and/or thoughts grow increasingly powerful. This creates a vicious cycle.

To break the anxiety cycle, we need to become aware of this cycle. So instead of letting our anxious thoughts and feelings drive our behaviour, we will learn to slow down our thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. In psychotherapy, the therapist and the client work together on breaking this cycle.

Address

12827 76 Avenue
Surrey, BC
V3W1E6

Telephone

+16047169979

Website

http://www.mindalwaysmatters.com/

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Dr. Jiwani, Licensed Naturopathic Physician
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