02/18/2024
A common response to try and overcome our wounding is to self-protect. This happens on a subconscious level. We try everything in our power to ensure we won’t feel that pain again. The cruel joke here is the wisdom for how to heal our wounds is inside the pain of the scars we carry.
In trying to avoid pain, we end up tensing against it. By attempting to avoid similar situations running on the fuel of fear, we wind up re-creating the same patterns. We end up creating a protective layer around our hearts that inadvertently cuts us off from healing. Our wounded, essential self is still holding the grief and pain underneath the wall we built up around ourselves.
Let’s shift gears for a moment. Imagine yourself, standing on the edge of a cliff. You’re getting ready to dive. What do you do? First, pause. Breathe, feel your feet. Take in what is happening. Notice. Do you run from the fear? Maybe not. Maybe you breathe with fear, you let it become the power that can move you off that ledge into the water below. Then it can be the graceful swan dive that comes from becoming aware and present in the moment.
In doing this, we foster integration. Integration is about befriending and expanding capacity for experiences. When we increase our capacity to hold our experiences, we can live a full and connected life.
What happens next is up to you. But at least you met the fear. At least you learned to be present to your experience and to not run away, at least not immediately. Possibly, you looked around, down, up, all around to see what is there in that moment to support you. And in that meeting of meeting yourself, you created a moment of connection and through it, you met peace, joy and love.
The invitation here is to dive into the unknown with your very next breath. Even with the pain of grief or insecurity, you are whole and complete. And it’s okay for it to take time to trust that.
The question is, are you going to let it stop you?