Matrum Midwifery

11/11/2021

Let’s not forget…

Lest We Forget ❤️⁣

10/14/2021

I’ll be changing how I talk about this….

Short version, for most people...forget about it!

07/01/2021

For those needing additional support, here are some resources.

The following is a list of resources/hotlines dedicated to supporting Indigenous people in crisis.
List also includes some provincial and national mental health help resources.
Please edit/add to as necessary and SHARE.

Indian Residential Schools Resolution Health Support Program-
24/7 supports:

KUU-US Crisis Line
1-800-588-8717

Indian Residential School Survivors and Family
1-866-925-4419
Mon – Fri, 8am – 8 pm PT:
Weekends, 10 am – 2pm PT:

Tsow-Tun-Le-Lum Society
1-888-403-3123

British Columbia Resources
Aboriginal Wellness Program
604-675-2551 or 1-866-884-0888

Canadian Mental Health Association - British Columbia Division
1-800-555-8222

HeretoHelp
1-800-661-2121

National Crisis Hotlines
Kids Help Phone
1-800-668-6868

Crisis Services Canada
1-833-456-4566 or text 45645

First Nations and Inuit Hope for Wellness Help Line
1 855 242-3310

*FLAG CREATION Kwakwaka'wakw artist Curtis Wilson (Vancouver Island)

07/01/2021

I take today as a day of reflection and mourning for the children that never came home and for all those that have “survived” but their lives have been, and continue to be, ravaged by the impact of the residential school system.

06/17/2021

Hello Everyone— some of you ask me periodically what’s happening with my hospital privileges. If you’re interested in reading about my journey, you can read more here:

Old link deleted

While it is a GoFundMe campaign, be assured that clicking doesn’t obligate you to donate. If you wish to share the link with people in your circle you think may be interested in this information, please do so!

Thank you in advance,

Katherine

Edit: new link https://www.gofundme.com/f/increasing-access-to-midwifery-care-in-nw-bc

Calling all folks who support midwives working in the northwest of BC and … Chelsea Keays needs your support for Increasing Access to Midwifery Care in NW BC

06/08/2021

Thank you, Amy Brown! The infrastructure has to be there!

06/01/2021

Today is International Children's Day. It was first proclaimed in Geneva during the World Conference on Child Welfare in 1925. On 4 November 1949, June 1st was established as the International Day for Protection of Children by the Women’s International Democratic Federation in Moscow. Since 1950, 1 June is celebrated as Children's Day in many Communist & post-Communist countries. And as I was born & raised in one of those counties, I acknowledge and celebrate it each year.

But it’s hard to celebrate it this year as we are reeling with the news of the discovery of 215 children’s remains in a mass grave found on the grounds of the former Kamloops Indian Residential School. We also shouldn’t forget that at the same time that Canada was sending soldiers to fight in WWII (where Jewish people were being herded into train cars for transport to mass extermination camps) it was also perpetuating its own genocide by stealing Indigenous children from their families and placing them in Indian Residential Schools.

I don’t know how to reconcile the history of Canada — we need to do better and we can start by acknowledging this genocide of our First Nations. So I will wear my orange shirt today in remembrance of the 215 tiny souls recently found and the many more we will likely unearth in the future.

06/01/2021

Call out! I’m looking for action shots of me at work with you or your baby! 😎
If you’re willing to share, either post them here or send them through Messenger.

05/29/2021

Hope you can join me

05/29/2021

I can only imagine the fresh wave of pain this discovery brings to families of these children and all Indigenous Nations. There are no adequate words of comfort.

05/09/2021

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers and mothers-to-be in my care! Additionally Happy Mother’s Day to.....

05/06/2021

Today is also the Narional Day of Awareness for Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women, Girls and 2Spirit people! Let’s not forget...

Today, May 5th, is National Day of Awareness for Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women, Girls and 2Spirit people.

“Indigenous women and girls are five times more likely to experience violence than any other population in Canada and this violence tends to result in more serious harm.”

is real and devastating. The women, girls and 2Spirit people in our communities are sacred and deserving of love and safety. Protect our sisters. ✊🏽

05/05/2021

Happy International Day of the Midwife!

This years’ message from the International Confederation of Midwives is “Trust the Data — Invest in Midwives.”

This is no less true in Canada & BC than in the rest of the world. The evidence on the benefits of midwifery care is overwhelming, yet 20+ yrs of regulation in BC and we still have to prove & justify ourselves. - you can do better!

03/24/2021

A different perspective

I see the word 'jealousy' thrown around so often in relation to children who have just become a new big brother or sister.

They are often described as being naughty, or difficult, because they're jealous. Pop into any online discussion group and look for a parent asking for advice for how to handle tricky behaviour from their eldest after a new baby arrives in the family and I guarantee that within the first handful of replies somebody will give advice saying something like "they're just jealous, you shouldn't give them any attention when they act up, totally ignore them and they will stop doing it". This advice couldn't be more wrong.

You see, jealousy is completely the wrong word to use in this scenario. A far better word to use is grief. Grief is a much clearer description of the big feelings that the firstborn is experiencing and it helps parents to empathise much more. Jealousy makes us think the firstborn is somehow choosing to behave this way and that their feelings - and thus them - are unpleasant. Phrasing it as jealousy pits parents against child. Phrasing it as grief helps parents to work collaboratively with their child to solve the problem.

What are they grieving? The close one-to-one relationship they had with their parent(s) before the baby arrived. The old routine they use to have. The availability of their parent(s) to respond to their needs almost instantly. Their place as the baby in the family. Their parents arms that were always there to hold them - and only them. The knowledge that they were the sole object of their parent(s) love. Grief describes these losses and the huge adjustment the firstborn must go through far more effectively than jealousy.

Of course, grief fades naturally with time (once it has initially been honored with the space it deserves). It gets replaced with new memories, relationships, joy and love. Difficult memories fade into treasured ones that make us smile...and so too, will the grief a firstborn feels fade as a new relationship with their sibling develops. Until it does, the best thing we can do as parents is to honor their grief, empathise with their feelings and support them through this tremendous transition with patience and love (the very opposite to the time outs, naughty steps, sticker charts and exclusion so many are sadly on the receiving end of in this position).

For more on the transition from one to two children, see my 'The Second Baby Book':

🇬🇧 https://amzn.to/3u5mLWA
🇺🇸 https://amzn.to/3arcT1r

01/07/2021

And with a midwife! 💚💚

The first baby for the Northwest will call Kispiox home, with Northern Health relaying word of the first borns for the Northern health region over the weekend. More

12/03/2020

Some of you may recall me talking about this....

We call it “night 2 fussies” and the constant nursing is not lack of milk at all ... actually all the nursing will bring in your milk.

Posted from
Read more about baby’s second night here: https://kellymom.com/ages/newborn/bf-basics/second-night/
If you are concerned that your baby is not getting enough milk, check these signs and check with your healthcare provider: https://facebook.com/LaLecheLeagueUSA/photos/a.264537160241504.82770.253475138014373/1721611477867391/?type=3&source=54
[Image: Blurred photo of neighborhood at night. Text: Second Night Syndrome
"All of a sudden, your little one discovers that he's no longer back in the warmth and comfort of his womb, and it's SCARY out here! All sorts of people have been handling him, and he's not accustomed to the new noises, lights, sounds, and smells. He has found one thing, though, and that's his voice...and you notice that each time you take him off the breast he protests--loudly! A lot of moms are convinced it's because their milk isn't 'in' yet, and the baby is starving. What's really happening is that your baby has realized that the most comforting and comfortable place for him to be is at your breast. It's the closest to 'home' he can get."
- Jan Barger, RN, IBCLC, FILCA from The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding]

11/20/2020

For those that are struggling with some of the more “mundane” (I have quotes around that word because they are perceived as mundane but they can feel boulder-sized obstacles to us when we’re not resourced) aspects of life, run the dishwasher twice, put away the laundry where it will fit, find whatever workaround that works for you which helps you cope and keep going.

A friend shared this and I really liked the lesson! *original poster (Kate Scott 2020)*:

RUN THE DISHWASHER TWICE.

When I was at one of my lowest (mental) points in life, I couldn’t get out of bed some days. I had no energy or motivation and was barely getting by.
I had therapy once per week, and on this particular week I didn’t have much to ‘bring’ to the session. He asked how my week was and I really had nothing to say.
“What are you struggling with?” he asked.
I gestured around me and said “I dunno man. Life.”
Not satisfied with my answer, he said “No, what exactly are you worried about right now? What feels overwhelming? When you go home after this session, what issue will be staring at you?”
I knew the answer, but it was so ridiculous that I didn’t want to say it.
I wanted to have something more substantial.
Something more profound.
But I didn’t.
So I told him, “Honestly? The dishes. It’s stupid, I know, but the more I look at them the more I CAN’T do them because I’ll have to scrub them before I put them in the dishwasher, because the dishwasher sucks, and I just can’t stand and scrub the dishes.”
I felt like an idiot even saying it.
What kind of grown ass woman is undone by a stack of dishes? There are people out there with *actual* problems, and I’m whining to my therapist about dishes?
But my therapist nodded in understanding and then said:

“RUN THE DISHWASHER TWICE.”

I began to tell him that you’re not supposed to, but he stopped me.
“Why the hell aren’t you supposed to? If you don’t want to scrub the dishes and your dishwasher sucks, run it twice. Run it three times, who cares?! Rules do not exist, so stop giving yourself rules.”
It blew my mind in a way that I don’t think I can properly express.
That day, I went home and tossed my smelly dishes haphazardly into the dishwasher and ran it three times.
I felt like I had conquered a dragon.
The next day, I took a shower lying down.
A few days later. I folded my laundry and put them wherever the f**k they fit.
There were no longer arbitrary rules I had to follow, and it gave me the freedom to make accomplishments again.
Now that I’m in a healthier place, I rinse off my dishes and put them in the dishwasher properly. I shower standing up. I sort my laundry.

But at a time when living was a struggle instead of a blessing, I learned an incredibly important lesson:

THERE ARE NO RULES.
RUN THE DISHWASHER TWICE!!!

11/12/2020

The mom is important, too

WHEN CAN I SEE THE BABY?

“When can I come see the baby?”
A question new moms might hear over and over.
At least at first.
Sometimes before she has left the hospital.
Before she has had a chance to sleep.
Before she has even showered off the blood.
“When can I come see the baby?”
Her phone dings while she settles back in to her home with a brand new human - to her brand new normal.

Her estrogen and progesterone levels are plummeting from the highest they’ve ever been to the lowest. She is shaky and hot and cold and sweaty and weak.
Whether she chooses to breastfeed or not, her milk is coming in and she is sore and engorged.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Whether she delivered vaginally or by c-section, her uterus will be contracting for days and weeks. Sometimes it’s as painful as labor.
She’s bleeding and will continue to bleed for up to six weeks post-delivery.
Her crotch is swollen and puffy and sore, or her incision is painful, or both.
She is struggling to go to the bathroom - and she p*es her pants (or pad) when she laughs, sneezes, and coughs.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Her core muscles are weak, making lifting ANYthing hard.
She’s starving. Endlessly starving.
She has stretch marks and varicose veins, hair loss and acne, blurry vision, and dry eyes. She sees a stranger in the mirror.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
She is totally and utterly exhausted. She hasn’t slept for more than an hour at a time in days or weeks.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Any independence she had - to run errands, go to work, shower, eat, p*e, sleep - has been suspended for now.
So when you walk into her house, look at HER first.
Give her space to heal, to bond, and to rest if she needs it.
Be there if she needs it.
Offer to help her.
And then help her.
Admire the baby, sure.
But don’t forget to nurture the mother."
-
📷