
08/20/2025
The way we speak to ourselves can either break us down—or build us up.
Dr. John Gottman’s Four Horsemen aren’t just for relationships with others—they show up in how we relate to ourselves too:
🗣️ Criticism – ‘I’m a failure.’
😔 Contempt – ‘I’m worthless’
🛡️ Defensiveness – ‘It’s not my fault’
🚪 Stonewalling – shutting down completely
Each one can harm your mental health and emotional resilience. But there are antidotes.
✨ Start with self-awareness.
✨ Practice self-kindness.
✨ Shift the dialogue within.
You deserve a relationship with yourself that’s rooted in respect, not rejection. 💛
Which inner voice do you struggle the most with?