04/11/2025
November is a liminal time, perfect for contemplating the significance and meanings of life and death. As a medium and death doula, my entire life exists in a liminal space, and I invite you join me here to explore these questions within yourself this month:
1. "Who am I without the roles that I play in this life?"
When you temporarily detach from being a son/daughter/child, a partner, a parent, a friend, a co-worker, an employee, a boss, a caregiver, attached to a nation, or involved in a belief system, etc. what is left? Who are you without your roles? Seek out the epitome of your essence; who you intrinsically are without labels.
2. "When I die, what do I hope people will remember me for?"
If you died unexpectedly, would people remember you for this in the moment? If not, what can you start doing today to help align your path with the person you are becoming?
3. "Do I regularly make time for and show my care for my loved ones?" It is important to take a step back and ask - if I died today, would I be happy with the amount of time I've spent with the people I love? We spend so much time on our devices, checked out, always believing there will be more time for the big moments, but it's the little moments, the intimate moments of connection and quality time, that people will always remember.
4. "What have my loved ones that have died before me taught me about life and death?" Have you made promises to dying or deceased loved ones about how you would strive to live your life, only to let those aspirations fade away over time? Think about how much their presence in your life meant to you, and work towards ensuring your loved ones feel that love and care from you as well. All we take back Home, and all we leave behind, is our experiences and our love.
5. "If I knew I had only 5 years left in this life, what would I change right now?" No one is guaranteed a tomorrow here, but you may have another 5, 20, 45 years here. Too many people are in a constant state of waiting... waiting for the right time, waiting for enough money, waiting for a sign... and most of those people wait too long, and never take the step towards living the life they envisioned for themselves. This isn't about being reckless or living like it's our last day, but taking a good look at what we're giving our time and energy to every day. Habits take time to build and time to change, but if you don't take the first step forward, you will be left in a state of waiting for the remainder of your days.
If these questions make you feel uncomfortable, you are not alone. Most do not want to contemplate these thoughts. However, in thinking about the temporary nature of life, we may feel empowered to live this life more fully, more abundantly, and more purposefully.
The Spirit Guided Path
