09/16/2025
Happy Back to School Everyone. Let the chaos and constantly changing schedule begin!
A little tip for everyone still finding their bearings… I get that things change, the kids also get that things change and they can flow with these changes and transition quite well if we communicate what is happening.
-A quick summery, we are going here not there, also a quick why : ie: so we had to switch therapists because she is sick, we are going to do sessions on Tuesdays because soccer is on Thursday and I really think you will love that… we changed karate class to a different day so you can see ___ on Monday etc..
The important part is the communication. Kids don’t tend to relate to adult thoughts or life experience and so over explaining sounds like a justification for. It being dependable or dismissal of their emotions.
It is typical to have disappointment, to struggle with change, especially that which they had no control over and no way to predict. That can make kids feel unsafe and unsure. So when we communicate what is happening in the now, they will adapt easier and feel safe. Eventually they know, even if they don’t want to something or it is not the preferred activity, or they would rather do the other thing and are experiencing disappointment and grief, you have given them solid info and also resolved the loop about the other plan or situation. Once they know what is happening now you can return to the original thing/ plan and ensure they know what will be happening with that in the future.
Example: Close the loop. So you will see Leanne on Mondays now. You guys will still play and hangout just on Monday instead of today because karate has a free spot and they can fit you in today. I really think you will like it so we are going to give it a try!
This is matter of fact and not an emotional conversation. It is informative .
The crucial part which will create trust and help with future regulation is to end the convo with an agreement.
We are going to karate now and we won’t have time to see Leanne (example) You will see Leanne Monday at 3 instead.
If behaviour is dysregulated or child is anxious, or refuse to go etc. communicate you understand their feeling but not in an emotional way just say I understand but we are going to karate and we are going to try it. It might be fun. We will see. You will see Leanne on Monday and you can tells her all about karate .
Give dates and times, don’t be emotional but simple info so kids feel safe and it show no one is letting them down, or abandoning them, simply things just change and this is the new plan,.
This gives them a sense of autonomy and control in their lives and helps them transition and except change without as much emotional dysregulation. This dysregukatiin will fade in time when children can rely on you to communicate and keep your word.
Disappoint is fine, grieving change and loss is fine, but we still control our behaviour and we do not let our feelings overwhelm us or impact the environment for everyone else around us as that is not appropriate.
Try it. Things tend to go much smoother…
Let me know if anyone gives this a try. I would love to post tips and get feedback.
Ps please let your childcare helpers and therapists know when there is a schedule change as well. We fo not like letting kids down either and certainly if I am going to have my timesheet back I would like to know so I can fill it. This is why cancelations and two week notice with pay is a thing in this industry.
Thanks All! Happy September
