Unity Counselling Services

07/08/2025

If you're wondering why you feel so disconnected, unseen or not quite "whole", the free series will help you answer that. The affects of Childhood Emotional Neglect are very profound, and you can experience clarity, hope, and healing. Check it out, I use this training every day in my practice to help clients create peace and joy in their lives.
Dean

Discover how to recognize and shine a light on the impact of CEN with my free 10-part challenge

01/02/2025

Q: How can relationship counselling help me experience a better life?

A: Individual relationship counselling helps a person learn about themselves so they can heal and grow, allowing for more acceptance and rewards in their life. Usually, a person seeks this help out when they’re suffering the consequences of not healing or growing, which presents itself as emotional, physical, or spiritual pain. A “better life” is generally considered to be balance and success around career, relationships, and physical health, but what about our emotional side? Work in this area helps us create a healthy attitude, one that’s resilient, creative, joyful, and connected with ourselves and others. The bottom line is that how you treat, or look after yourself, is the foundational work for as satisfying life as possible, despite your family history or circumstances. In this way, counselling will help you experience a better life.

11/02/2024

Long, but a worthwhile read if your relationship is struggling. I wouldn't share this it wasn't good, but learning the skills takes time and effort, just like a good relationship. 😃
Dean

THE BEST MARRIAGE ADVICE EVER!

Choose to love each other even in those moments when you struggle to like each other. Love is a commitment, not a feeling.

Always answer the phone when your husband/wife is calling, and when possible, try to keep your phone off when you’re together with your spouse.

Make time together a priority. Budget for a consistent date night. Time is the “currency of relationships,” so consistently invest time in your marriage.

Surround yourself with friends who will strengthen your marriage and remove yourself from people who may tempt you to compromise your character.

Make laughter the soundtrack of your marriage. Share moments of joy, and even in the hard times, find reasons to laugh.

In every argument, remember that there won’t be a “winner” and a “loser.” You are partners in everything, so you’ll either win together or lose together. Work together to find a solution.

Remember that a strong marriage rarely has two strong people at the same time. It’s usually a husband and wife taking turns being strong for each other in the moments when the other feels weak.

Prioritize what happens in the bedroom. It takes more than s*x to build a strong marriage, but it’s nearly impossible to build a strong marriage without it!

Remember that marriage isn’t 50-50; divorce is 50-50. Marriage has to be 100-100. It’s not splitting everything in half but both partners giving everything they’ve got!

Give your best to each other, not your leftovers after you’ve given your best to everyone else.

Learn from other people, but don’t feel the need to compare your life or your marriage to anyone else’s. Comparison puts your focus on the wrong person.

Don’t put your marriage on hold while you’re raising your kids, or else you’ll end up with an empty nest and an empty marriage.

Never keep secrets from each other. Secrecy is the enemy of intimacy.

Never lie to each other. Lies break trust, and trust is the foundation of a strong marriage.

When you’ve made a mistake, admit it and humbly seek forgiveness. You should be quick to say, “I was wrong. I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

When your husband/wife breaks your trust, give them your forgiveness instantly, which will promote healing and create the opportunity for trust to be rebuilt. You should be quick to say, “I love you. I forgive you. Let’s move forward.”

Be patient with each other. Your spouse is always more important than your schedule.

Model the kind of marriage that will make your sons want to grow up to be good husbands and your daughters want to grow up to be good wives.

Never talk badly about your spouse to other people or vent about them online. Protect your spouse at all times and in all places.

Always wear your wedding ring. It will remind you that you’re always connected to your spouse and remind the rest of the world that you’re off limits!

Connect into a community of faith. A good church can make a world of difference in your marriage and family.

Pray together. Every marriage is stronger with God in the middle of it.

When you have to choose between saying nothing or saying something mean to your spouse, say nothing every time!

Never consider divorce as an option. Remember that a “perfect marriage” is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

✍🏻 Worth Sharing

11/01/2024

Very wise, now let us help you learn to love your partner when you don't "like" them.
Dean

"ARE YOU WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?

During a seminar, a woman asked, "How do I know if I am with the right person?"

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, “It depends. Is that your partner?”
In all seriousness, she answered “How did you know?”
“Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it’s weighing on your mind.” replied the author.

Here’s the answer:

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love.

People in love sometimes say, I was swept of my feet. Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It’s a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, “Am I with the right person?” And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone
else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this)

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a DECISION."