04/29/2026
Early in my career a client came to see me for weight loss.
She wanted to lose about thirty pounds. Reasonable goal, clear motivation, ready to do the work. We started our sessions and I gave her suggestions around making healthier choices, feeling satisfied with less, moving her body more.
She came back having gained weight.
We tried again. More sessions, more suggestions, more carefully crafted content delivered while she was in hypnosis.
She kept gaining.
I was baffled. And frustrated. And in a moment of complete honesty while she was in hypnosis I said out loud: there must be some reason why you're not following my suggestions.
She started talking.
What came out had nothing to do with food or portion control or any of the things I had been carefully scripting for her.
She told me about being seven years old, visiting her grandmother in hospice over and over again. Not really understanding what was happening. Just watching her grandmother get thinner and thinner and thinner until one day she was gone.
Her subconscious had made a connection that her conscious mind had never considered.
Thin meant dying.
Every suggestion I had given her about losing weight was landing on a subconscious that believed with complete conviction that getting smaller could kill her. It wasn't ignoring me. It was protecting her. Fiercely, loyally, and with absolute certainty that it was doing the right thing.
That was the day I threw out every script I had ever written.
Because no script in the world could have anticipated that. No generic suggestion could have reached it. The only thing that could help her was understanding what her subconscious actually believed and speaking directly to that.
Once we addressed it, once her subconscious understood that her grandmother's thinness was about illness and not about weight, everything changed.
The subconscious is always trying to keep you safe. Even when it looks like it's working against you, it is running the best program it has.
Your job is to find out what that program is.
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