Maggie Claydon Counselling

08/01/2025

Think you might be co-dependent? Here's a great checklist!

July 3, 2017 Gerald Blackwell Am I Co-Dependent? Patterns and Characteristics of CodependenceThe following checklist is offered as a tool to aid in self-evaluation. It may be particularly helpful to newcomers as they begin to understand codependency. It may aid those who have been in recovery a whil...

01/12/2025

Every night as I fall asleep, I disintegrate into nothingness

I move from particle to wave, and all the possibilities lay before me

Time and space bend, so that whole worlds are somehow contained in moments

And I exist as everything, everyone and every feeling in my dreams

My dreams whisper to me what we are never allowed to say out loud, and push me to remember who I really am.

I am energy. I am a soul. I am the universe.

A profound awakening that I repeatedly forget time and time again

And this is the continual journey: forgetting, then remembering, forgetting, then remembering…

Knowing that I have chosen to forget, because remembering is so exhilarating!

And then upon waking, all my molecules seem to reform into matter once again

Yet what a painful process it is, of squeezing an entire cosmos into a human vessel

Pretending that I could ever be contained. Pretending I am not bigger on the inside.

Yet for those few fleeting moments between sleep and wakefulness, I am caught so magically between worlds where it feels possible to exist as both

Both energy and matter, both soul and human

I keep my eyes tightly closed while holding onto dreamland for a few extra moments, remembering I am a soul playing the ‘human game’

And what a game it is…to feel, to express, to sense the soul beckoning at the edge of consciousness, reminding me this is all for the experience and the fun of it.

Reminding me that if it’s no longer fun, to surrender my fascination with old ways of feeling, thinking, doing…and level up in the game through embodiment, genuine emotional expression and tracking down with the tenacity of a bloodhound, what brings in more joy, connection and authenticity.

Reminding me of my autonomy, my wisdom and my aliveness.
And holding on to the remembrance that dreamland is real. ✨

01/09/2025

12/07/2024

Being a Relaxed Woman

A few weeks ago I heard one of my favourite authors talk about wanting to be a “relaxed woman”. Just hearing those words made me soften and feel a sense of relief. YES! I want that…I desire to be a relaxed woman! What a juicy and alluring idea, in a world that expects women to be constant givers. Through my own emotional/spiritual growth process lately, the lessons seem to dove-tail so perfectly with how to step more into being a relaxed woman, that I feel called to share these simple (and yet somehow not easy) practices. Here’s what has come through so far…

1. Be in my hips. Feel my sit bones, drop my energy down and feel the weight of my body in my seat. Feel the support of the earth beneath me. My embodiment is essential for everything else that follows.
2. Check in with my inner/younger self’s needs. Stay with her and prioritize her. Act specifically to meet those needs.
3. Follow my authentic desire and pleasure. Notice an energetic rising up in the body. This is my life force, my aliveness.
4. Practice being with uncertainty. Notice when fear seeks to contain or suppress my life force. Take more risks - as the goal is to live, not to be certain.
5. Move toward what holds meaning, purpose and contributes to this world and my community. The mind always needs a project, make sure it’s an intentional one.
6. Notice and release body constriction. This is my fear, which will drive me to control.
7. Stay in present time. Let go of past hurts and let go of predicting future outcomes. There is always only right now.
8. Stay in my natural state of peace, play, care and curiosity. This will naturally occur when I am feeling safe and emphasizing the importance of fun.
9. Express my thoughts and feelings, honestly and lovingly. Breathe through the fear of others perceiving me poorly and the illusion of abandonment.
10. Say no or set a boundary, when it feels like tense pressure in my body. Using my voice brings me into my natural softness.
11. Lean into others with ease. Don’t lean in with any bit of pressure, expectation or grasping energy. This is just my fear and illusion of ‘lack’ showing up.
12. Go slow, in order to honour my body’s needs and intuition.
13. Practice humility. Understand I don’t know anything. Come to this awareness often, with lightness and humour.
14. Claim my autonomy and encourage agency in others too.
15. Let go of my ego's resistance, using my body and breath. Notice this as constriction in the body. Discern between resistance and my intuitive boundaries.
16. Connect from a place of embodiment and freedom. Set others free in the process.
17. Stay in my integrity, where my words and actions match. And be gentle on myself when I inevitably fall short of all of this. 🌷

11/26/2024

Need a framework for your monthly relationship check-in?

10/09/2024

Relationships don't have to look one way. Co-create the relationship that works for your needs, boundaries and desires!

Here is a great tool for communicating what elements feel good for you as part of a relationship :)

03/20/2024

For a long time I wore the patch of people pleaser. I told the story that I “hated letting people down” and “wanted to make people happy” but the reality is it was about me.

I wanted to make people happy SO I DIDN’T FEEL GUILTY.

I don’t want to say no SO I DON’T FEEL AWFUL AFTERWARDS.

I want to be there because if I’m not I’LL HAVE PEOPLE TALKING NEGATIVELY ABOUT ME.

At the end of the day people pleasing is about ourselves.

And not wanting to feel uncomfortable emotions.

In working with people there’s always a “ah ha” moment when someone understands that they’re not really pleasing— they’re controlling. They’re trying to control how someone perceives them. And how they feel.

Once you understand this, you can start breaking the pattern.

The truth is: adults are capable of being disappointed. And you aren’t here to please everyone around you. You’re here to be authentically yourself. That’s how you have resentment- free relationships

03/08/2024

In this 4-part workshop, physician and trauma expert Dr. Gabor Maté untangles common myths about what makes us sick, connects the dots between psychological pain and the warped values of our culture, and offers a compassionate guide for health and healing.