Tamar Brosh - Trauma Healing for High Performers, Berlin (2025)

19/07/2024

What I am versus what I should be

(The endless pursuit of self-acceptance)

Many years ago, I attended a seminar about self-acceptance.

One of our exercises was called “Face and Unveil Your Inner Critic.”

We created a table with two columns: "What I Should Be" and "I AM." For example, under "What I Should Be," I wrote, "I should be totally ambitious and goal-oriented." In the "I AM" column, I wrote the simple truth about myself: "I am mildly ambitious and live mostly in the now."

This exercise, created by Shai Tubali, Ph.D., showed me how much self-judgment and self-criticism I had. I was trying to be someone I was not, causing unnecessary pain. By comparing my expectations with my reality, I realized the importance of accepting who I truly am.

In our journey towards self-acceptance, many of us face an internal conflict. The mind, shaped by societal norms and external comparisons, creates a relentless pursuit of perfection, leaving us feeling inadequate and unworthy. The heart, however, offers a different perspective. It sees us as complete and valuable in the present moment, embracing our flaws as part of our unique structure.

True self-acceptance is a profound spiritual experience, a connection to greater wholeness and divinity. By aligning our mind with the heart’s wisdom, we can experience inner peace and self-confidence. Reflecting on these ideas, we realize that listening to the heart’s affirmation of our worth helps us transcend the mind’s limitations and embrace a fuller, more compassionate view of ourselves.

Thought Experiment: Unveiling Your Inner Critic

Take a few moments today to try this thought experiment by Dr. Shai Tubali.

Create a table with two columns: "What I Should Be" and "I AM."

In the "What I Should Be" column, list the expectations and standards you believe you need to meet. Societal norms, family expectations, or personal aspirations might influence these.

In the "I AM" column, write the honest truth about yourself as you are now. This should be without judgment or criticism, just an acceptance of your true self.

Reflect on these lists. Notice how the expectations may cause unnecessary pressure and pain.

Recognize the reality of who you are and how embracing this truth can lead to greater self-acceptance and inner peace.

This simple exercise can help reveal the inner critic we all carry and remind us that we are already whole and valuable, just as we are.

21/05/2024

How do I become better at controlling my emotions.

(…maybe controlling them is not the answer…)

Do you know the feeling of being totally shaken?

Something threatens your known reality, and you feel the floor being swept from under your feet.

In such moments, we are faced with a sense of fear, dread, and anxiety, and we feel we have no control over the way we think and feel.

It happened to me in my early twenties, when my boyfriend, whom I had been dating for three years, abruptly told me he was ending the relationship and moving on.

I wasn’t ready for that.

I didn’t want this breakup; it was not my plan.

But he insisted, and I remember how, in that coffee place where he dropped the bomb, I couldn’t stand on my feet. My knees were so weak.

I remember feeling humiliated, out of control, and embarrassed by my lack of self-mastery.

It was a powerful turning point—my clear decision to become a master of my emotional system. I embarked on a life-long journey of study.

Today I wish to share with you my first lesson.

I have learned that some of our emotions are like our internal security system, buzzing alarms when trouble's afoot, ready to whip our bodies into action. These natural alerts—anger, sadness, fear, disgust, and surprise—have been with us since caveman times.

Understanding these emotions as tools rather than obstacles is key to mastering them. Just as we would learn to operate a computer or a new machine by consulting manuals or experts, mastering our emotions involves understanding their triggers and messages.

For instance, anger might pop up when something important to us is under threat, or fear might sneak in when we feel out of control. Embracing this knowledge has revolutionized my approach to personal development and emotional intelligence. Rather than trying to suppress or control my emotions, I learned to observe them, understand their origins, and constructively respond to their signals.

Here's a quick guide to managing emotions:

Pause and Observe:
Feel a storm brewing? Hit the pause button. This helps you avoid rash reactions while you tune into your body's alarms (think racing heart or clenched fists). A few deep breaths can turn down the emotional thermostat.

Analyze the Trigger:
Post-cooldown, ponder what set off the alarm. Ask the whys and hows to uncover emotional patterns and triggers.

Choose Your Response:
Now, decide how to act. Speak it out, set boundaries, or simply let it slide—choose the route that lines up with your goals and values.

p.s.
Ever felt completely overwhelmed by your emotions? 🌪️ How do you cope when something unexpected shakes up your world?

hashtag hashtag hashtag "

16/05/2024

Hello, beautiful fellow lovers of truth. It is almost Sunday, and it is time for Satsang with Shai Tubali!!

Satsang, derived from the Sanskrit words "sat" (truth) and "sangha" (association), refers to the company of the highest truth, typically in the presence of an awakened teacher. This sacred gathering is more than just a meeting; it is a transformative experience that fosters spiritual growth and inner awakening.

Satsangs with Shai is not just about being in silence and meditating together. It is about contacting truth through the power of wisdom, and expanded consciousness.

There is also the power of being together as a group, which makes this event more powerful and meaningful. When we devote our attention to the truth as a body of passionate lovers of truth, we can go deeper and reach higher states together.

So I truly hope we can all meet online this Sunday for this rare opportunity to stop the world for a while, pause the mundane, and open up to the eternal.

The event link is in the first comment.

Let's merge in love!

25/04/2024

** Unlocking Healing Through Expanded Consciousness: Beyond Psychedelic Therapy **

In the evolving landscape of mental health, the use of expanded states of consciousness presents a transformative approach to healing trauma. Unlike traditional methods, this technique harnesses the innate power of our own consciousness to revisit and reshape traumatic memories without external substances.

** The Power of The Expansion Method for Trauma

The core of the "Expansion for Trauma," is based on a simple yet profound principle: by reaching the heights of our consciousness, we can confront and transform our psychological challenges. This approach offers a stark contrast to psychedelic therapy by relying solely on our inner strength, avoiding the need for external aids.

Three Transformative Aspects of Expanded States:

** Breaking Boundaries:

Expanded consciousness allows us to break free from the confines of our usual mental limits, including memories and temporal constraints. This liberation reveals that our innermost being remains untouched by past traumas, empowering us to approach painful memories from a position of inherent freedom.

** Reclaiming Power:

In expanded states, we experience a surge of strength and autonomy, counteracting feelings of powerlessness that often accompany traumatic experiences. This newfound power is crucial in overcoming the grief associated with lost control, filling us with happiness and freedom.

** Transcending Victimhood:

A sufficiently expanded mind transcends the "victim consciousness," which exacerbates vulnerability during traumatic events. When our consciousness grows larger than the event itself, our self-perception shifts from fragile to fortified, enabling deep healing and recovery.

** Practical Application: Consciously Confronting Trauma:

To harness this technique, one must first consent to re-experience the trauma consciously. This involves being physically and mentally present, allowing oneself to feel the pain fully and thus release the memory. By ceasing resistance, we transform the traumatic memory profoundly, enabling a flow that alters its impact.

So expanded states of consciousness do not merely help us let go of traumatic imprints; they enable us to imbue our most painful experiences with meaning and purpose. Understanding that our suffering was not pointless but was crucial for our personal evolution allows us to reframe and integrate these experiences positively, leading to lasting healing and growth.

Join me and Shai Tubali for a 4-day seminar dedicated directly to releasing trauma and letting go of the past. Check the first comment for more details.

02/04/2024

Did you know you're a hero?

(Every day, you're achieving more than you realize)

You wake up each morning, filled with the courage and strength to face the day.

You fuel your work with passion and motivation, striving to do your very best.

Yet, it's so easy to be hard on ourselves.
"Am I doing enough?"
"Am I living up to my potential?"
These thoughts can be a constant struggle.

(But here's a secret: You're doing better than you think)

Sometimes, we procrastinate, delay, reject, or not reach our full potential. I get it; I do the same.

But remember: Being overly critical can hurt your spirit and well-being.

So, what can you do? Try these three simple steps:

1️⃣ Take a deep breath and remind yourself: "I'm doing a great job."
2️⃣ Look at the path you're on. You're the hero in your own journey.
3️⃣ Encourage those around you, just like you would with your loved ones, recognizing their daily efforts.

Every single day, you're more heroic than you realize.
Let's spread some positivity!

👉 What's one small heroic act you've done today? Share in the comments!

P.S. Remember, you're the hero of your life story.

25/03/2024

Did you know that traumatic experiences can leave lasting imprints on our being?

The challenge with these imprints, especially those etched in our psyche during childhood trauma, is that they often become so entwined with our personalities that we mistake them for the core of our being.

Consider this: if I endured violence from a parent and internalized the belief that I am unworthy or undeserving of love, I would navigate life encumbered by these detrimental convictions.

These would shape my inner reality and significantly influence my interactions with the world. It's important to realize that these beliefs are not inherent to me; rather, they result from life’s traumatic episodes imprinting skewed perceptions upon my worldview.

However, there is hope :)

These imprints can be erased.

The key lies in expanding our consciousness.

It's in this state of heightened awareness, recognizing our innate worth, inner tranquility, and understanding the unassailable part of us that remains untouched by trauma – the essence of our completeness – that we can view our trauma-induced imprints with compassion and disentangle ourselves from their grasp.

These imprints lose their hold over us, no longer seen as truths but as superficial layers that expanded consciousness can strip away.

Each time I assist a client in shedding these burdens through expanded consciousness, witnessing their transformation – the straightening of their posture, the emergence of a smile, the ease of their breath, returning to their fundamental state of innocence and simplicity, untouched by any imprint – I am overwhelmed with profound satisfaction and gratitude.

So, I urge you to go on this journey of self-discovery and healing, liberate yourself from the shadows of the past, and embrace the untouched and pure essence that has always been within you.

p.s.

Would you join Shai Tubali and me on a 4-day journey of letting go of the past and releasing some painful imprints together?

Say yes in the comments and I will send you more information.

12/03/2024

How do I know if I haven't released trauma?

How can I overcome my birth trauma?

Why do I feel like treating a trauma removes something from my identity? As if I would lose a part of myself?

How can I release unconscious traumas that repeatedly bring the body into states of freezing?

Maybe you are also asking yourself some of these questions!

Join me tonight. I am hosting a FREE and LIVE webinar on the topic of trauma healing and the root chakra.

There is such a great need for clarity and the right perspective when it comes to healing trauma, so I hope I can share with you some of the wisdom, knowledge, and direct experience I have gained after many years of leading thousands of trauma-healing sessions.

If you cannot join me live, you can still register for the webinar and receive it tomorrow, directly to your email, with a recording of the event.

You can find the link to the event registration in the first comment. I hope to see you tonight!

04/03/2024

This morning, I came across a quote on LinkedIn that read, "When I feel ignored, I distance myself."

My initial reaction was one of disagreement; this sentiment didn't resonate with me.

Is it an inevitable response to feel the need to distance oneself when ignored?

On my evolutionary path, I have learned one impotent lesson: the external world is just a reflection of our mindset.

When I perceive neglect, it's vital to challenge immature emotional responses by negating them to foster emotional maturity.

Indulging in self-pity...

Revenging by ignoring others and feeling fake superiority...

Engaging in actions solely to recapture attention...

Filling the emptiness within with distractions and entertainment...

These are just a few examples of the myriad reactions we harbor.

However, what if we chose a different route?

What if we allowed ourselves the space to not react at all?

What if we accepted and held the discomfort of feeling ignored, or even acknowledged that our perception of neglect might be a misinterpretation of reality?

A fundamental principle I've learned is that we alone can fulfill our needs.

When we succumb to knee-jerk, unconscious reactions to feelings of neglect, we inadvertently neglect ourselves.

In doing so, we create distance from our true selves. The irony is palpable.

We often delegate our emotional needs to others, expecting them to provide what we think we can't give ourselves.

Yet, when we consciously embark on emotional development, we soon realize that the capacity for all the emotions we seek is already within us.

The most direct path to emotional fulfillment lies in embracing our ability to be emotionally self-sufficient and maintaining presence with ourselves, regardless of external circumstances.

Reflecting on the original quote, my reinterpretation would be:
"When I feel ignored, I turn inward, giving myself the attention I need."

I am passionate about helping others tap into their inner wellspring of positive emotions, empowering them to become sources of positivity rather than seekers of it.

What is your experience?

01/03/2024

** The most challenging aspect of trauma lies in the profound sense of disconnection from oneself. **

In these difficult moments, rather than being present for ourselves, we often mentally check out (flight).

While this might be a psychological defense mechanism that helps us cope, the cost is substantial.

I remember a time many years ago, while being physically assaulted when I felt as though I had left my body. I watched myself struggling, growing weaker as I failed to remain present and anchored in my core.

The powerlessness I felt, at the mercy of someone so disconnected from their emotions, marked one of my life's darkest chapters. Drifting away during the attack seemed to lessen the pain, but only years later did I understand the deeper harm I had inflicted upon myself.

It was through my training in the Expansion Method and becoming a certified instructor, as well as undergoing my own trauma healing, that I realized the true challenge.

It wasn't the attack, the fear, or the heartless interaction between two humans that was most traumatic.

It was the absence of presence, the act of abandoning myself, that constituted the real trauma.

This revelation was my wake-up call. It was then that I vowed to dedicate all my energy and passion to developing a resilient core, an unshakable center, and an unwavering presence.

Many years have passed since that commitment, and life, in its infinite grace, has continually tested me. Each challenge was an opportunity to affirm the strength of my presence.

I'm pleased to say I've succeeded!

This doesn't mean I'm unaffected by life's ups and downs. I still feel pain, sadness, and fear, but I remain present. Through mindful breathing, expanded awareness, and embracing life's experiences with an open heart, I've learned to stay connected, no matter what.

Healing from trauma requires cultivating a state of presence and absolute trust in our capacity to remain present. In the realm of presence, trauma loses its hold.

I invite you to share your thoughts and experiences on this journey of healing and presence.

23/02/2024

When I was 25 and had my first job as a lawyer, my boss was a scary employer.

He had shotguns at his office, and he was constantly screaming at his secretary.

He treated me differently because, in his eyes, I was better than her; I was a lawyer, an accomplished person, while she was just a commoner, a simpleton.

He used to drive me to court and tell nasty jokes about her and his clients, and I had to laugh or, at the very least, look amused by his dark humor.

He used to lie to his clients so he could make more money from them.

I was young, and he was my first boss.

I had no idea what to expect, but every fiber of my being told me he was a terrible man.

Back then, in the 1990s, no one spoke of leadership, let alone enlightened leadership.

I remember asking myself if this was my fate—working for violent, insensitive, privileging men who would make my life miserable.

It was clear to me he just appeared to be a grown man, but that essentially, he was an emotionally undeveloped child.

I made the clear decision to be self-employed so I would never need to put up with people who abuse their position and power to make themselves feel more confident while being so immature.

I decided to become a leader myself, a source of inspiration.

For me, true leadership is an all-encompassing position in our personal and professional lives.

True leadership is grounded in humility.

It's about being open to admitting one's mistakes and acknowledging limitations. Such leaders create a culture of trust and respect, leading not through authority alone but through vulnerability and authenticity.

This openness not only paves the way for personal growth but also inspires collective learning within the organization.

True leadership is grounded in centeredness and inner balance.

In the heat of challenging situations, the ability to remain neutral and untriggered is a testament to a leader's emotional strength.

This neutrality is intertwined with compassion—understanding and valuing others' perspectives, even when they diverge from one's own.

True leadership is grounded in the recognition that we are all one.

It's about recognizing that every team member, regardless of their role, is part of a unified whole.

Leaders who embrace this view cultivate an inclusive atmosphere where collaboration and mutual support are the cornerstones of the team's success.

It's a leadership style that transcends individual egos and focuses on the collective good.

Being emotionally mature and spiritually developed doesn't happen by itself.

If we wish to embody emotionally mature leadership and humanity, we need to prioritize it and work at it.

At the end of the day, we wish to know we were successful in being the best versions of ourselves and that we did good in the world and to the people around us.

A toxic, entitled, disconnected, and superior leadership is over.

Time to make space for the new.

17/02/2024

While traveling in India over 20 years ago, I encountered an unusual piece of local advice: "Avoid walking around with the blue fruit bags; monkeys might attack you for it."

🐒 As a Westerner, my initial reaction was skepticism. Monkeys, really? However, this experience led me to a crucial lesson in decision-making.

🤔 I had three options:
Hide the blue bag, taking the advice at face value.

Carry the bag, dismissing the warning.

Observe others with the bag and learn from their experiences.

I chose the third option, and soon witnessed a real monkey chase involving the infamous blue bags! It was both amusing and alarming.

This incident raises important questions about decision-making in our personal and professional lives:

How do we process and act upon advice?

Do we take risks or play it safe?

🔍 My takeaway? Always evaluate advice, especially when it's unfamiliar. Sometimes, a little caution goes a long way, even if it challenges our preconceptions.

11/10/2023

An a ca****la version of Allen Pote/Robert Delgado's 'Prayer of St. Francis'! Click the Subscribe button for more songs like this and thanks for listening! G...

29/05/2023

"The present moment holds absolute perfection, not in some distant future. Let go of self-judgment and act as if you were already perfect, whatever your idea of perfection may be.

Tamar Brosh - Trauma Healing for High Performers

19/07/2024

21/05/2024

16/05/2024

25/04/2024

02/04/2024

25/03/2024

12/03/2024

04/03/2024

01/03/2024

23/02/2024

17/02/2024

11/10/2023

29/05/2023

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