Emotionalist

24/09/2019

Curiosity is a superpower available to anybody. It is the key to break through a pattern of depression or anxiety and leads you to what truly lights you up with passion.
The only price to pay is that you have to be willing to let go of what you believe to be true.

23/09/2019

This short story of my childhood is about the feeling of melancholy, which is a natural feeling but we need connection to others inside those feelings to let go of our shame.

23/09/2019

the key for real connection and the cure for the feeling of not belonging.

21/09/2019

12/09/2019

Meditation group

The first book I bought from my own money was a book on telekinesis when I was ten years old, the second one was on meditation as the first book prompted me that it was an important part on the path of learning telekinesis.

Meditation was my path to overcome addiction and lead me from depression and compulsive workaholism to the life I am living now. I can say that my connection with my psyche has become incredibly simple and clear, which I see reflected in my life and relationships.

What meditation means for me has changed a lot and these days, when I speak of meditation I speak of a willingness to listen to oneself in every moment rather than a discipline of sitting, breathing and reciting mantras.
Meditation to me is to face everything exactly as it is, look, listen and feel without expecting to change it and that brings about an insight that has me find the an appropriate action that gradually leads to more clarity in life.
This brings about an effortless, quiet and calm relationship to the mind and therefore clears all fear, anxiety and depression. It is a stable foundation rather than a successful technique.

I am currently holding a small group that meets twice a month online.
In each session, I bring attention to every individual and assist them in building a healthy relationship with their mind themselves.
It is a coaching circle so to say with my particular flavour and style.
There are still spots available if you would like to have a place where you are supported and held with quality attention and care.

19/08/2019

My Birth Diary

19.Aug.2019

We have visit from my wife’s friend who will stay with us through the birth and for a few weeks.

My feelings have been brewing up the last days.
I am think about my friends and I feel a strong sense of suspiciousness reconsidering who of them is really safe and trustworthy to be let in close.
A overwhelming sense of aloneness is coming over me.
I feel a conditioning inside me saying men are not supposed to feel but to serve and take care of the logistical side of birth, get in the money and handle the breadwinners work.
This voice says I have no connection to the baby and therefore the women have a right to speak before me even if they are unrelated to the child.

I get asked when she will have her baby, addressed with her firstname rather than as my wife or the mother of my child. How she will do it as if I had nothing to do with it except giving semen.

Keep reading in the comments

06/08/2019

I have struggled a lot with the fear of losing my creativity. It is a predicament that comes with making a living from selling products that come from a creative process. Creativity came in waves and many times left me for long periods.

I have gained an understanding that creativity is the inner conversation that responds and reflects the world I see. Creativity is the world’s imprint on me and my hope is that I express it in ways that have not been expressed before. The topic my creativity chooses is not a conscious choice by me but is chosen by my subconscious and brought to my awareness. It is a little voice that is curious and feels in visual, auditory, sensual and sensory insights. It connects with the world and is seemingly inseparable. The subject is chosen by my own subconscious or if it comes in from the world around me, this is where creativity can lead me to a sense of oneness. The world is in me and I am the world. Whether the topic is chosen by the world or chosen by my subconscious is a silly question. The artist tends to look for ownership in an idea that is grown on his personal brilliance. There is no creativity in total isolation, in isolation I nearly deal with memory that I process from when I was connected to the world.

Therefore there is no original thought like an invention or an idea that is perfectly mine and separate from the world. There is no thought that springs from me in isolation and is completely new and owned by me. But there is creative response that is present and very current to what is happening. If there is creativity in isolation, it is merely playing with memory that comes from a time we spent in connection.

True creativity is never stagnant but moves and shapes itself anew all the time. It has no one shape. When I try to keep it focused in one way or one direction, I become numb to it. When I try to always paint red pictures because I loved the poppy-field in the summer I will be looking for that experience and miss the creative expression of the beauty when I walk past the ocean. The same happens when I try to create expression of joy and close myself off from sadness.

If I have closed myself to the world, I cannot possibly be in touch with creativity.
I have seen it with many creative professionals that when they focus on their success, they use what they call “references”. References are works of other artists that supposedly act as inspiration. What actually happens is they take the idea from another or from earlier in their career and replicate it, as they have became numb to creativity inside themselves.

These days I rarely experience the numbness. My creativity has become a voice that is more than just a producer of images as a photographer, but creativity is a part of me that helps me find expression in various forms. I nurture it and I care for it. I try to expect less but offer more.

What I keep learning is that shame is a manifestation of fear that likes to suppress expression of creativity, because it is so vulnerable und uncomfortable. Therefore I am making it a practice to write and express and dare to be with this discomfort.

Support me on medium if you like this or share your thoughts in the comments

Losing touch with Creativity, equals losing touch with Yourself and this is why You can’t afford that.

07/07/2019

Have you ever asked yourself why we feel shame and a sense of not being good enough?
Some people are so busy glorifying their personal success and running a business teaching this glorification as “empowerment” to others. I regard this as an old issue, particularly as we live in a world where humanity still has so much to learn to live peacefully with one another and not be destructive of its own environment.
Our minds create a trip, where we justify self-aggrandizement by saying: I am just not willing to live a small life, out of being ashamed. In this mindset, shame is still an all punishing entity which I need to be defiant of. To escape that sense of punishment, I create an exaggerated sense of permission for myself and swing to the opposite side, where I justify the thriving to become some kind of super being, super powerful, super achiever.
This has been a common male domain, but it happens amongst women too. It is an ambitiousness and self-exaltation to be a great businessman, sales or empowerment guru.
There is a glorification of greed in this mentality. Greed is a fear that there is not enough, “I am not enough,” so I need to push and gather quick and hard. This greed is driven by cowardice, as you avoid your shame and your feelings of inadequacy.
I was a child when my grandmother said, “you will never be good enough…”
and then I decided to prove everybody wrong.
Don’t we all have a story that somehow sounds similar? This brings a feeling of insignificance to one’s awareness, that one is very small and unimportant.

To read the whole article, visit the page linked in my bio!!

✌

07/07/2019

Have you ever asked yourself why we feel shame and a sense of not being good enough? Let’s look at this great pattern of life together…

25/06/2019

Every, EVERY boy likes to draw a c**k.
It won’t change when they big.
We like the c**k and I think it’s good when we love what we are.
Our body, our thoughts, our feelings.
The only way that has worked for me is to see that all the feelings and thoughts, wether s*xual or even really dark and prevented are THERE.
They are going through the mind and that is a fact. It is my controlling that says “they should not”.
Once I see this, I can be in peace as I let them be what they are. I do not control s*x or anything that comes to my mind. When I just look at the mind, and by that I mean all that I can perceive, then I can be and do not need to be in conflict with myself or others.
**k *xuality

23/06/2019

The harvest from today’s herb hunt in the Forrest. Here is ground elder and Ribworth plantain.
Super nutritious plants that grow freely everywhere. I love learning and getting to know to plants, it fills me with joy to connect and learn about the herbs around.

21/06/2019

Peace of mind comes from caring about everything you think but not believing and acting everything you think. It does not come from forcing the mind to be quiet but bringing it to balance. Listening attentively to it, carefully, harmlessly will help you hear what balance means for you.
-emotionalist-

Writing by moritz kerkmann Hood

20/06/2019

Understanding yourself deeply can not be done with any Methode or technique. Only when you slow down like you do when you walk in the park and watch with no judgement, that you get to see one detail at a time as it is and with a lot of care and respect for every detail will you be able to see truth and therefore transform all fears and suffering. -emotionalist

20/06/2019

I am offering a few spots for those that would like to work with me as a coach.

I assist and guide you to find total understanding of your conflicts and resolve them completely so you don’t replace the conflict with another dependance but you find real freedom, freedom from conflict and freedom from the method, including me.

Come talk to me!

20/06/2019

I love the mythology of plants and drugs, the stories one can find in the books that talk about the old witches and shamans in old Europe. This image I created, speaks of the beautiful belladonna which gives the one who eats them a sharpened vision that brings all red colours to glow.

17/06/2019

We escape feelings we find uncomfortable and use things to create the feelings we prefer instead through for example a substance. This is what forms habits or addiction. Can I observe this without judging the object of my addiction? Why do I want to change my experience? What causes me to be in conflict with what is?

Please share with me!
What is a habit that you use to escape?

17/06/2019

We escape feelings we find uncomfortable and use things to create the feelings we prefer instead through for example a substance. This is what forms habits or addiction. Can I observe this without judging the object of my addiction? Why do I want to change my experience? What causes me to be in conflict with what is?

Please share with me!
What is a habit that you use to escape?