12/01/2026
When this came up in my memories, I saved it to talk about. It’s my adorable 5 year old impersonating me by wearing a bracelet.
When I read that phrase, “being Mama,” it made me wonder what she saw and felt it was like to be me. Clearly, she seems pleased with the idea. It does make me think about what our mothers modeled to us about the experience of being a mom, and what we are showing our children– especially our daughters.
I have had so many conversations with women who are stuck in survival mode for years, barely getting by in their role as mother.
No one told them that it’s OK to make their own well-being a priority. Perhaps they witnessed a lot of martyrdom from their own mothers, or even constant health issues. We unknowingly just walk into the program for what it is to a be a parent, according to what our parents modeled to us.
Sometimes it’s not even our parents– it’s the culture all around us. How are mothers portrayed in the TV shows you watch? One thing that stands out to me is the huge culture of moms needing to drink a lot of wine in order to get through their days. It’s not cute.
I had plenty of terrible times as a mother, and I also sacrificed my health and well-being before I knew it was OK to expect better.
It made an impact on me when a doctor who was helping me get through a major health crisis told me I shouldn’t be trying to get pregnant again. When I commented that I just had to “take one for the team,” she stopped me and told me that I did not have to do that; that *I* actually mattered. I’m so grateful to her.
I hope that I can model to my daughter and other women a new way of “being Mama.” That moms can take care of themselves, keep healthy boundaries, have friendships and interests, invest in developing their special skills, talents, and passions, and build lives that FEEL GOOD.
❤
What were you shown about “being Mama?”