19/03/2025
What is love?
During my twenties I embarked on a quest to understand the meaning and purpose of life. It was sparked by a question:
‘Who am I, why am I here and how do I make life better?’
The question was born from a desperate need to know I had a reason for being, something of value to give to people and to life, and a truth that once illuminated would shine a light on the meaning of suffering and the path that would liberate me from the rat race reality and break dawn on a much brighter possibility.
I am so thankful that I dared to ask the question that birthed acceptance of one of my deep truths:
’I am not happy in this life, I am not happy in me, and I want to find my happiness’.
I had been battling depression for most of my adolescence, a depression that arose through multiple traumas, and although I refused to be reduced by it, and consistently strived to heal and grow, it was a fierce battle. It was desperation that pushed me into the great mystery where I wandered boundless in search truth and understanding.
I asked:
‘Why do we suffer and how is suffering overcome?’, so that I might find my peace and happiness, and I questioned the nature of freewill, fate and destiny, eager to understand the mechanics of life and what power, if any, I had in the orchestration of my life; was I free to create or a subject of a much greater story?
My quest for peace, freedom and happiness led me on a profound journey of self-discovery, emotional healing and life transformation where one of the most empowering realisations I encountered was, in my view, a very simple truth: we live in a world of too much fear, and not enough love; we need to learn to grow our love, so that we can embrace our suffering, our fear, and our pain with a brave heart, and not be reduced by what happens to us, and learn to love ourselves so much that we embrace our full authentic presence in acceptance, compassion, loving kindness, and forgiveness, while striving to live our lives in true alignment with our heart-centred values, which for me meant living with peace, freedom, happiness and, kindness, while pursuing meaningful purpose, creating success where is truly matters to my heart, and living joyfully along the way, and when this is not possible, loving anyway.
My truth-seeking quest became a story about learning how to love myself first, and so naturally, I found myself asking,
‘What is love?’ and, ‘How do I grow my love?’, questions that framed my next decade and led to my peace, freedom, and happiness.
This morning, I asked my two-year old, ‘what is love’ and he confidently asserted that the answer is 2. I beam in the beauty of his truth and I wonder, perhaps one day he will write a sequel to ‘The Hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy’?
What do you believe about what love is?
What do you understand about how we grow our love?