19/01/2025
Hey midlife miracles!
🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Have you ever found yourself wondering…..
“If only I could feel confident, vivacious and respected again, then life wouldn’t feel so lonely, I’d have better energy levels and then I could enjoy this part of my life and bring my all to every task and have better relationships.”
Or, in other words…
If only I had more money (insert whatever condition on what makes you happy) I would be able to stop feeling stuck, believe in myself, get myself out of this rut etc. etc…
You will find many posts on Facebook and Instagram that will tell you exactly what you need to do to fulfill that condition in order to have your particular silver plate of happiness and Cinderella ending.
But this post is not about giving false promises - basically because the question above is based on a false premise - i.e. a condition that comes from hope, an expectation that something is going to fulfill you and a desired result that may or may not happen. 😳
Does this mean that there’s no point in wishing for anything or having goals or dreams or a personal development vision? 🤷🏽♀️
I would be a pretty crap coach if that was what I was saying, BUT let’s go pre-question here and be very precise about what it is that will give you this holy grail of whatever it is you are after, be that more clients, a wonderful partner, a purpose after the kids leave home etc.
Instead of saying, “ if I only had this or that.” Ask yourself what would this statement sound like if it was not asked from a place of poverty but from one of inner wealth?
Well, it wouldn’t begin with ‘if only’ because that in itself is said from hope and not from empowerment.
What about, “I am able to complete many tasks confidently. I have a lot of energy for (xyz) because I am self-caring and I respect myself and others - that’s why it’s impossible for me to be lonely. My relationships, even when they are challenging, are always going to enrich me in some way. I’m able to focus and feel a lot of purpose in life because of this.”
But surely that’s too simple? - just change the words a bit and hey presto - another perspective?
Well, I would say that there is something else to add and it’s the little word at the beginning of the original question, “if.”
‘If’ is a condition but it can also be a statement of truth. Is it true that I will feel more energy if I go to bed too late and eat processed foods while smoking 30 a day? 🤯
No judgement - just a question.
Or If I am more self-nurturing, how does that actually change my life?
When you ask the ‘if’ question like so, then you can be more honest but also start to be a scientist of your own life. And just as importantly, it empowers you.
If you feel the need for support with this, I partner as a coach with my clients to help them focus the question correctly and dig deeply into exactly what stops them from living their miracle life and to feel empowered to start living it, whatever size shoe you take!
It’s all about your voice - heal it, feel it, speak it, love it. 🌹
I help women like you in the age range of 40 to 60, to feel totally secure about your true voice in this world. It's the most fulfilling and purposeful joy to feel confident about your authentic voice in this world. As the kids grow up and leave home, it can be a transition into wisdom and harmony rather than desolation and regret. My coaching programme is affordable (I'm not high ticket and refuse to go into all that high pressure sales stuff - you either want to work on this or not and I charge professional rates for a qualified transformational coach with 2 decades of experience of voice coaching as well as somatic work and naturopathy.
Check out my programme here (in the first comment).
With much love 🥰
