23/02/2026
La saine colère.
For much of my life, I repressed my anger.
I never allowed myself to truly feel it, express it, or share with anyone that I was angry, upset, or anything less than “okay.”
I was a “good boy.”
I was a “nice boy.”
I was a “spiritual” boy.
(Except really, I was an angry boy.)
I had been taught that anger was bad, shameful, unspiritual, and a sign of weakness. On top of that, I felt a narcissistic need to protect an image of myself as kind, caring, compassionate, and very, very spiritual, free from any hint of anger.
Science is now showing that people-pleasing, anger-repression, and stuffing down all the life inside of us is incredibly harmful to our health, contributing to and exacerbating a myriad of illnesses and chronic conditions.
When we repress our anger, we repress our life force, our passion, our sexuality, our discernment, our fire. We throw the baby out with the bathwater in our pursuit to be “nice.”
“Nice” is a lie, in that sense.
It was both terrifying and liberating to start allowing myself to feel and express anger in healthy ways. Saying “no” when I meant no, becoming okay with upsetting, disappointing, and even angering people, setting healthy and fierce boundaries, and allowing myself to fully grieve the past.
Giving that inner child full permission to grieve and cry and truth-tell his way into love. Being my authentic self.
I stopped acting out of guilt and shame and allowed myself to walk away from people and situations that didn't serve me or align with my highest ideals.
I stopped allowing anger to control me.
I stopped trying to save everyone and pretending to be the “nice guy.” I let go of the need to be seen as compassionate, spiritual, and kind.
None of that is my business. How people see me.
I stopped caring what people thought of me. This was the most liberating thing of all.
This journey through the healing portal of anger has been deeply liberating and has unlocked so much energy.
Anger is good, you see! Anger is healthy. Anger is not unspiritual, harmful, unhealthy or bad when you finally find out how to unlock and harness its awesome power.
Anger will heal you to the core if you let it.
And it will unlock true compassion.
- Jeff Foster
