Pasadena Institute For Relationships - Imago Therapy

08/06/2019

22/05/2019

FRANCINE BEAUVOIR, PHD,
JUST PUT OUT HER NEW BOOK!!

“In Search of Peace and Belonging: Through Letter Writing”

We think it will be an easy read, yet with depth and substance. Enjoy!

Dr. Beauvoir coaches her clients to write reflective letters to important people in their lives - family, friends, lovers and employers. All the letters in this book are coached letters written cooperatively with her clients. The premise of this book is that letters, emails or texts, can be effective ways for two or more hurt or fearful individuals to communicate. When we are hurt we often react by attacking or being dismissive. That’s when the wisdom of letter writing comes in. Writing a letter allows you to pause as often as you need, to read and re-read and feel the impact of the words you just wrote. On the receiving end, the person can privately react whichever way they wish without damaging the relationship.
She is hoping you can feel enriched by reading a selection of these letters. Some of them were never sent. All of them are real letters written or received by her clients.

Dr. Beauvoir believes this is one way to find Peace and Belonging.

Please order it and we'd love you to write a review on Amazon!! You may buy the paper back ($9.95) or the kindle (4.46) by going to Amazon, click here:
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=in+search+of+peace+and+belonging&ref=nb_sb_noss

We have attached pictures of the front and back cover.

28/12/2018

A TOAST FOR THE NEW YEAR

Here is a 7.5 mins video of Francine wishing you to receive your dream for 2019.

Also, click here to buy any, or all of our books in paperback or Kindle format: http://pasadenainstitute.com/books-tapes-and-dvds/

For further information see our website: www.pasadenainstitute.com

02/09/2018

FLOODING OF ADMIRATION

Today we continue our series on rituals that we use in our marriage to help us stay on the path of growth and healing. This video clip (5:15 mins) shows how we do the “Flooding of Admiration” that we teach our coupes during the “The Getting The Love You Want Couples Workshop”. We do it once a month. We circle the seated partner and follow this outline:
1. ADMIRING PHYSICAL TRAITS
2. ADMIRING CHARACTER TRAITS
2. THANKING FOR BEHAVIORS WE LIKE
3. GENERAL ADMIRATION

We raise the voice as we progress and end up jumping up and down with enthusiasm. The partner just sits and lets it in saying nothing, and then giving a hug and saying “Thank You” at the end. Often we find that letting love in is one of the hardest pieces of work for couples – thus Harville and Helen’s third book: “Receiving Love”.

On January 23rd we shared the ritual of reading the “Relationship Vision” to each other (Take another look). We share how to set this up in Chapter 3 of Volume 2 of our trilogy on intimate relationships.

Click here to buy any, or all of our books in paperback or Kindle format: http://pasadenainstitute.com/books-tapes-and-dvds/

For further information see our website: www.pasadenainstitute.com

13/08/2018

11/07/2018

LET’S CELEBRATE !
Perfection is the enemy of “good enough”.

21/04/2018

FLOWERS IN THE SPRING TIME

In Francine’s video a few hours ago she mentioned the cherry blossoms in Washington DC and the flowers of Paris.

21/04/2018

CAN ANGER BE ADDICTIVE?

Some thoughts from Francine (a 5 minute video) about her personal journey.

To buy one or several of our three volumes of "GETTING BACK THE LOVE WE HAD" click here: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had

Also, you may want to schedule a Skype session as a couple with her. She still sees clients from Paris! Here is her email address: francine.pasadenainstitute@gmail.com

23/01/2018

RELATIONSHIP VISION
We are sharing a series of videos on the rituals we have been using in our marriage for the past twenty-five years. We find that rituals really help couples stay on the path toward growth and healing. The ritual we will share today is the reading of our "Relationship Vision" which we do every other week. Please read chapter 3 in Volume 2 of our trilogy on intimate relationships on how to set this up and use it in your relationship.

Click here to buy any, or all of the three books in paperback or Kindle format: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had

29/12/2017

Dear Friends:

CHANGE OF EMAIL ADDRESS ANNOUNCEMENT:

Bruce Crapuchettes’ new email address is: bruce.pasadenainstitute@gmail.com
Francine Crapuchettes’ new email address is: francine.pasadenainstitute@gmail.com

Bruce Crapuchettes has changed his email address from:
bruce@pasadenainstitute.com to:
bruce.pasadenainstitute@gmail.com

Francine Crapuchettes has changed her email address from:
francine@pasadenainstitute.com to:
francine.pasadenainstitute@gmail.com

Please change our email addresses in your contact folder.

Thank you for making these changes!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL - MAY 2018 BE PEACEFUL AND BRING YOU DEEP SATISFACTION.

We spent Christmas with our French cousins in the Loire Valley just out side of Paris.

Click here to buy any, or all of the three books in paperback or Kindle format: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had

Our love to you all,

Bruce and Francine

14/11/2017

Dear Couples Community:

VOLUME THREE IS OUT AND AVAILABLE ON AMAZON!

Here we are at our favorite breakfast restaurant. We meet here every other morning to write.

This is the season to be Thankful, and we want to express our own thankfulness. We are grateful to all of you, our readers, you have fostered our thinking, and we are grateful for our lives here in Paris that allow us to write, create and deepen our thinking.

Here we are holding all three books, yes THREE! We are happy to announce the publication of volume three subtitled: “A new focus on each other”. In it we present our view that when couples Dialogue with each other, (our recommended technique for working through conflicts), they are meditating with one another (we call this “Relational Meditation”). That process allows their relationship to reach new depth, and to strengthen their connection.

Each of the three volumes of "GETTING BACK THE LOVE WE HAD” have 42 unique questions from real couples with our answers (126 in all) and two chapters regarding intimate couplehood. Here are the contents:

Volume One – Ending The Power Struggle
Ch 1: “Bruce and Francine’s Story”: tells our personal journeys. Ch 2: “Forty-Two Questions from Real Couples and our Answers”. Ch 3: “The Foundation and Pillars of a Strong Relationship”.

Volume Two – Rebuilding Our Dream
Ch 1: “The History of Couplehood from the Beginning of Time to the Present” by Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt
Ch 2: “Forty-two more Questions from Real Couples and our Answers” Ch 3: “Creating A Relationship Vision And How To Use It”

Volume Three – A New Focus On Each Other
Ch 1: “Dialogue as Relational Meditation”, explains why and how we see the “Formal Dialogue” as a form of mindful meditation.
Ch 2: “Forty-Two more Questions from Real Couples and our Answers” Ch 3: “Working with requests designed to get your needs met”

We are hoping that this Trilogy will enhance your intimate relationship and assist you on your journey of growth and healing.

Click here to buy any, or all of the three books in paperback or Kindle format: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had

Our love to you all,

Bruce and Francine

22/10/2017

Dear Couples' Community,

This morning we had omelettes at our favorite restaurant, and when we told him it was our 51st wedding anniversary today, he gave us champagne to celebrate.

We got married on October 22, 1966. The first twenty years of our marriage was very painful both for us and our four children. THEN in the fall of 1989 we attended the "GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT" workshop for couples. We were stunned and we turned 180 degrees around and practiced daily, working through "our stuff" in a safe way using the Imago Dialogue.

We studied under Harville Hendrix for the next six years and then joined the faculty of the Imago International Institute. For the past 25 years we have shared our learnings with couples and have trained therapists to use Imago Relationship Therapy with couples.

In semi-retirement, we now live in Paris, still seeing some couples via Skype (write us at bruce@pasadenainstitute.com if you would like a session with either of us), but our main work now is writing books.

17/10/2017

Dear Couples' Community

There have been five top customer reviews on Amazon for the trilogy: "GETTING BACK THE LOVE WE HAD" -- all with 5.0 out of 5 stars. Here is the latest:

By Kevin Stapleson September 28, 2017
Format: Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase

"If you want to know how to have a committed relationship, or are in a committed relationship, Bruce and Francine's book is the one for you. This is a hands on how to do it manual for couples that will teach them how to turn their struggles from the pain of rupture to the joy of connection. They explain how the intentionality and safety of the Formal Dialogue will over time, move couples out of reactivity and can ultimately transform their partner ship into a safe haven, where they give each other the freedom to be themselves without judgement or criticism. I speak from experience.
My wife and I attended a couples Imago workshop with Bruce in 1998 and the work of removing negativity from our relationship required dedication responsibility and the abundant willingness to create a kind, conscious and caring partnership. We found the rewards for our efforts exceeded our expectations."

This kind of feedback warms our heart and feeds our soul. Thank you Kevin.

Cllick here for the book from Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had

While driving in the countryside outside of Paris this past weekend, we came across a small village with the name of "Beauvoir". See - Francine has already made her mark in the world!

14/10/2017

Dear Couples Community:

Here we are in Paris drinking to the joy of having “GETTING BACK THE LOVE WE HAD” Volume 2 out in Kindle format.

We both are impressed with the convenience of having kindle on our iPhone and mini-iPad to read when ever we have a spare moment. Just yesterday, I, Bruce, being done with a museum faster than Francine, sat in a comfortable chair and read a book on my Kindle App on my iPhone until Francine was done.

We believe that you also would appreciate the convenience, not to mention the low price, of having our book on one of your devices. Get it so you have “GETTING BACK THE LOVE WE HAD” at your finger tip to read just one Q&A at a time. Your relationship will thank you for that!

Just click here: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had

20/09/2017

DEAR COUPLES COMMUNITY:

Good things happen to those who wait! You have all waited patiently for us to read and re-read, and cross all the t’s of Volume Two of our Trilogy, and . . . here it is!

We are excited that Harville and Helen have encouraged us in this endeavor and have written Chapter One: "A history of couplehood from the beginning of time to the present”. We think you will find it fascinating!

Chapter Two consists of: “Forty-Two Answers To Real Questions From Couples Who Feared They Were Losing Their Way.”

In Chapter Three we focus on creating a relationship vision and several of “our” couples share their vision and the meaning this dream means for them.

You may now order “Volume Two: Rebuilding Our Dream” (JUST OFF THE PRESS!!) by clicking here: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had+Vol+2

Should you wish to order: “Volume One: Ending The Power Struggle”, click here: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had+vol+1

Both volumes are available on Kindle, and can be purchased by clicking here: https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=getting+back+the+love+we+had&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Agetting+back+the+love+we+had

Here is what Harville and Helen say about our books:
“We love this series of three books. Its like walking through a relational Library and/or reading an Encyclopedia of relational wisdom, from which you yourself can select the issues about which you want to become more knowledgeable. We suggest that you take it in small bits, savoring each morsel of insight with the confidence that you are absorbing the wisdom of experienced clinical minds and being guided into a world you have never known, but which has always been your dream. Please share it with your friends so the process of relational transformation can spread.”

Love to you all,

Bruce and Francine

PS: Please write a positive review on Amazon. It really encourages sales!!

08/09/2017

After the month of August in California seeing family, friends and clients, we are now back in Paris. Yesterday we visited the markets of "Rue Mouffetard" and explored the ancient streets and alleyways. Also, we are showing the covers of Volumes 1 & 2 of our Imago trilogy. We are hoping you all have bought Volume 1 by now and Volume 2 is coming out in a few days. Please go to our website (www.pasadenainstitute.com) to order our books and our clinical services (now via Skype).

26/08/2017

From Bruce Crapuchettes and Francine Beauvoir

HELLO EVERYONE !

In the course of our work with couples, we have often found ourselves telling them that we are all in recovery from hurts we experienced as we were growing up. We have been inspired by the Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) Twelve Steps and based on their model we wrote the following 12 Step for all of us couples who desire a maturing relationship.

Here they are:

TWELVE STEPS FOR COUPES IN RECOVERY

1. We admitted we were powerless over our reactivity, and that our intimate relationship had become unmanageable.

2. We came to believe that the dialogical process (“a power greater than ourselves”) can restore us to connection.

3. We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to a dialogical recovery process.

4. We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves rather than of our partner.

5. We admitted to ourselves and to others our tendency to blame our partner for conflict in our relationship.

6. We are ready to gain insight and to work on changing our defense system.

7. We are humbly releasing our grasp on our old behaviors.

8. We willingly recognize and verbalize how we have hurt our partner and we each commit to changing our behaviors.

9. We each continue to take a personal inventory of when “I feel hurt” and take initiative to process that hurt dialogically.

10. We take full responsibility for our 50% contribution when we have hurt our partner.

11. We seek through careful thought and meditation to be on a conscious journey, seeking growth, wisdom, maturity and strength to carry out new behaviors.

12. Experiencing an awakening as a result of these 12 Steps, we strive to apply these principles in all our relationships and activities

(Copyright © August 2017 by Francine Beauvoir and Bruce Crapuchettes)

11/08/2017

***UPDATE***
Hello everyone and thank you for your interest in our work. We are now living in Paris and we are very active in continuing our work in helping couples. It does not matter where we are because everything is done through Skype sessions as this has been a proven way for that one-on-one personal professional interaction. We are taking on new couples and continually working with our current couples. We are looking forward to working with all of you who are in need.

To schedule your session please go to our website @ pasadenainstitute.com and send an email to make an appointment to either:
bruce@pasadenainstitute.com
francine@pasadenainstitute.com

We are also writing every day and volume two of our trilogy will be out in the next couple of weeks. We recently wrote the following which we hope will be helpful for you who are practicing Imago work in your relationship.
________________

The purpose for having a Formal Dialogue is the following:
To share your inner self, meaning “frailties” not “complaining”
To open up and become vulnerable with your partner
To get to know your partner better
To differentiate from your partner
To become more connected with your partner
To learn to accept your partner the way he or she is
To get in touch with your needs and learn to ask positively to have them met

The purpose of having a Formal Dialogue is NOT:
To try to change your partner
To try to improve your partner (by getting him or her to eat healthy, lose weight, stop drinking, etc.)
To blame, shame or criticize your partner
To try to convince your partner of your point of view

The purpose of taking a time-out is:
To (and ONLY to) provide safety instead of becoming reactive during Dialogues

The purpose of taking a time-out is NOT:
To let you stop Dialoguing because you don't like what your partner is saying
To let you stop Dialoguing because you don't agree with your partner
To let you punish your partner
To let you react defensively by withdrawing from Dialogues

The Formal Dialogue, when used properly, can become the heart of your maturation process and a wonderful way to maximize your full potential.
______________________
To review the theory of Imago, pull up our website: www.pasadenainstitute.com and click on "What is Imago Therapy?"