Fat Fives Football

13/04/2026

Season 10 is reaching a fever pitch! ⚽️🔥 Our players are putting in the hard yards, and the results are absolutely amazing!

Team of the Week! 🌟
Huge congrats to our TOTW Captains who are leading by example on the scales:
- Chris: 2.0kg loss (Week 10) – leading from the front! 🛡️
- Steven G: 2.9kg loss (Week 6) – what a powerhouse performance! 🧤

Weight Loss Competitions! 🏆
A massive round of applause for the latest legends to join the elite 5% Club:
- Wrighter
- Greg R
- Steven G

Joining this club is a monumental milestone! Hitting that 5% weight loss mark proves that consistency on the pitch is the ultimate game-changer. Every effort is moving you closer to your goals!

Who’s ready to finish the season on a high and drop those final pounds? Let us know your goals for the final week in the comments! 👇

13/04/2026

🎉 SEASON 10, WEEK 11 FAT FIVES FOOTBALL RESULTS! 🎉
The penultimate week of Season 10 delivered absolute fireworks! As we head into the final week of our 12-game fixture list, the stats are soaring and the records are falling. Here is the Week 11 breakdown! 🚀

🏆 TEAM OF THE WEEK! 🏆
Leading the charge with a fantastic 2.7kg loss, Matt S takes the captain’s armband! He’s joined by Willie (2.5kg), Ian (2.1kg), Matthew Mc (2.0kg), Timber (1.6kg), David B (1.5kg), Liam S (1.4kg), Nathan (1.3kg), Greg A (1.3kg), Jordan K (0.9kg), and Ryan Mc (0.8kg). Phenomenal effort on the scales this week! 👏

🏃‍♂️ INDIVIDUAL WEIGHT LOSS 🏃‍♂️
The air is getting thin at the summit! We now have the top 7 players tied on a perfect 30 points. Greg A holds the #1 spot based on percentage lost, with Willie in 2nd and Greg R in 3rd. With only one week and 8 fixtures left, can these leaders hold their nerve for the perfect season finish? 💪

⚖️ OFFSHORE COACH TEAM WEIGHT LOSS ⚖️
Scrandinavia continue to set the pace, sitting top with a massive 107 points! O.B City are chasing hard in 2nd on 99 points, while Ivory Toast hold 3rd with 88 points. The battle for the team trophy is reaching its climax! ⚖️

👑 POTS (PLAYER OF THE SEASON) 👑
James W remains the man to beat at the top with 58 points! Barry M has surged into 2nd (50 points), while Lewis P is locked in a 3rd-place tie with Zac and Lewis F on 49 points. With only one week left, every save and tackle counts! 🧤

🍫⚽ GOLDEN CHOCOLATE BOOT (MVP) ⚽🍫
We have a new leader! Chris M has jumped into the top spot with 48 points! Connor M sits 2nd (42 points), with Lewis F in 3rd (40 points). It’s all to play for in the final fixtures to see who claims the ultimate bragging rights! 🚀

📊 MATCH RESULTS & STANDINGS 📊
The CHAMPIONS showed exactly why they own the crown; Scrandinavia took full points, scoring an incredible 22 goals while conceding just once! O.B City secured 2 vital wins, Bayern Bru picked up a win and a draw, and Parmesan Belgrade fought hard for 2 draws. 🥅

The Standings:
Scrandinavia sit 1st on 91 points, followed by Bayern Bru in 2nd on 67 points, and O.B City in 3rd with 51 points.

Only one week and 8 fixtures remain until the end of Season 10. Let's finish strong! ✨

09/04/2026

WEEK 9 HIGHLIGHTS: THE PRESSURE IS ON! ⏱️⚽
We’ve officially entered the business end of Season 10! With the final whistle of the season fast approaching, the intensity under the lights has reached a whole new level. Every pass, tackle, and goal in Week 9 carried massive weight as squads fought to solidify their place in the standings. 📈

🌟 WHAT TO WATCH FOR:

The Tactical Chess Match: At the top of the table, the front-runners face a huge test of nerves. See how the leaders handle the pressure of maintaining their gap while the chasing pack hunts for any sign of a slip-up. ⚔️

The Mid-Table Tug-of-War: The standings are incredibly tight, with multiple teams locked on points. Watch the battle for positioning as squads fight for the upper hand in the race for the top half.

Goal-Line Heroics: Defensive discipline was the theme of the night. Look out for some breathtaking saves and last-ditch clearances that proved the difference between a point and a loss. 🧤

Individual Brilliance: As the fatigue of the season sets in, some players are finding another gear. Keep an eye out for a jaw-dropping volley from distance and a clinical solo run that carved through the defense! 🍫⚽

The table is shifting, the pressure is mounting, and the drama is at an all-time high. Catch all the action and the full Week 9 breakdown in the highlights now!

WATCH NOW: https://youtu.be/vXJmPCljO7c 📺

OFFICIAL SEASON 10 SPONSORS 🤝 A huge thank you to our partners helping us make this season the best yet:🏆 The Offshore Coach - Sponsor of the Team Weight L...

09/04/2026

James is leading the way! ⚽️✨

Huge congrats to our Season 10, Week 9 Captain, James E, for a fantastic 2.8kg loss this week! He’s crushed it on the scales and earned that armband through pure graft. 🔥🏆

Setting the pace for the rest of the league: proof that the hard work pays off. 🦁💪

We caught up with the man himself for a chat: check out our latest Reel to hear what the Captain had to say! 🎥🍿

Drop a "🔥" to show James some love! Who’s chasing the armband next? 👇

06/04/2026

🏆 SEASON 10, WEEK 10: WE HAVE OUR CHAMPIONS! 🏆
What a historic week at Fat Fives Football! Records have been shattered, the scales have been conquered, and we officially have our Season 10 winners with two weeks still to spare! Let’s get into the Week 10 breakdown! 🚀

👑 SCRANDINAVIA ARE THE CHAMPIONS! 👑
Huge congratulations to Scrandinavia, who have officially secured the Season 10 title! With another perfect 9/9 points from 3 wins, they now hold an 18-point lead at the top. With only 15 points left to play for, they are untouchable! Not only have they won the league, but they are already breaking all-time league points records with only two weeks left to go! 🤯🔥

🏆 TEAM OF THE WEEK! 🏆
Leading the Week 10 TOTW with a solid 2.0kg loss, Chris takes the captain’s armband! Joining him in a fantastic week of losses are Loon (1.6kg), Steven G (1.5kg), Lewis Fer (1.2kg), Greg A (1.1kg), and the 1.0kg club: Coco, Gogs, Willie, and Eoin! Michael L (0.8kg) and David P (0.7kg) round out the squad. Incredible dedication from everyone in the TOTW with the finish line now in sight! 👏

🏃‍♂️ INDIVIDUAL WEIGHT LOSS 🏃‍♂️
The "Elite Eight" are still holding strong! Our top 8 players are all on perfect runs of 27/27 points! Greg A remains top of the pile, with Willie in 2nd and Lewis Fer moving into 3rd. With only two weeks left to maintain these perfect streaks, the pressure is on to secure those final Individual Weight Loss honors! 💪

⚖️ OFFSHORE COACH TEAM WEIGHT LOSS ⚖️
There is a new leader on the scales! Scrandinavia move into 1st place with a huge 93 points, overtaking O.B City who sit on 90 points. Ivory Toast remain 3rd on 78 points. With only two weeks left to weigh in, this battle for the Team Weight Loss trophy is going to be a photo finish! ⚖️

👑 POTS (PLAYER OF THE SEASON) 👑
James W continues to dominate the POTS standings, sitting top with 56 points! Lewis P holds 2nd with 47 points, while Lewis Fer and Zac are locked in a tie for 3rd with 44 points. With only two weeks left for players to grab those vital Man of the Match awards, can anyone catch the goalkeepers at the top? 🧤

🍫⚽ GOLDEN COCO BOOT (MVP) ⚽🍫
Connor M stays at the summit with 42 points! Chris is chasing in 2nd with 38 points, and Loon rounds out the top 3 with 34 points. The race for the Golden Coco Boot is coming down to the wire with only two weeks left to find the net or provide the assists needed to sn**ch the trophy! 🚀

📊 MATCH RESULTS & STANDINGS 📊
Aside from the champions’ perfect run, Ivory Toast and Fatburn Rovers both had a great week with 2 wins from 3! Meanwhile, Rapid Viennetta and Flaberdeen played out a hard-fought draw in their bottom-table clash. 🥅

The current top 3 standings see Scrandinavia sitting in 1st place as our confirmed CHAMPIONS on 82 points, followed by Bayern Bru in 2nd with 64 points, and O.B City holding 3rd place with 45 points.

What a season! Even with the title decided, there is still plenty of pride and podium spots to play for in the final two weeks of Season 10! ✨

04/04/2026

Join us in celebrating two monumental milestones this week! 🌟⚖️

First up, Willie has smashed the barrier to join the ELITE 10% Lost Club! 🏅 From his legendary 2.2kg loss in Week 9 to his untouchable consistency, he's proven that showing up is the secret sauce. ⚽️💨

Next, let’s hear it for Steven (aka Loon) for joining the 5% Lost Club! 🎖️ After that explosive 3.7kg start in Week 1, he’s laid the foundations and is moving closer to his goals every single week. ⚡️

Massive congrats to both of you: you’re true warriors on the scales! 🛡️🍫

Who’s hitting their next milestone? 👇

28/03/2026

🎉 SEASON 10, WEEK 9 FAT FIVES FOOTBALL RESULTS ARE IN! 🎉
What a massive week for Fat Fives Football! The competition is heating up, the goals are flying in, and the progress on the scales is nothing short of inspirational. Let's break down all the action from Week 9! 🚀

🏆 TEAM OF THE WEEK! 🏆
Leading the charge with a stellar 2.8kg loss, James E takes the captain's armband for the Week 9 TOTW! 🌟 Joining him in this powerhouse lineup are Loon (2.0kg), Greg R (1.9kg), Willie (1.8kg), Gregor M (1.5kg), Ryan MC (1.5kg), Taylor (1.4kg), Jonny (1.3kg), Greg A (1.3kg), Martin P (1.1kg), and Coco (1.0kg)!

Incredible work by all our TOTW stars and a massive well done to everyone who saw a loss this week! Every gram counts toward those season goals! 👏

🏃‍♂️ INDIVIDUAL WEIGHT LOSS 🏃‍♂️
The "Perfect Run" club is looking elite! Our top 8 players are all sitting on a maximum 24 points! 💪 Greg A currently claims the top spot, followed closely by Willie in 2nd, while Greg R makes a big move into 3rd. Consistency is the name of the game!

⚖️ OFFSHORE COACH TEAM WEIGHT LOSS ⚖️
O.B City continue to dominate the scales, sitting top with a massive 83 points! 🔥 Scrandinavia are breathing down their necks in 2nd with 81 points, and Ivory Toast hold strong in 3rd with 71 points.

👑 POTS (PLAYER OF THE SEASON) 👑
It’s a "Goalie Union" at the top! 🧤 Our top 4 positions are currently held by goalkeepers, proving just how vital they are to their squads. James W leads the pack with a huge 57 points, followed by Lewis P (42 points) and Barry M (40 points).

🍫⚽ GOLDEN CHOCOLATE BOOT (MVP) ⚽🍫
Connor M takes the lead in the race for the boot with 37 points! 🚀 Chris M is chasing hard in 2nd (33 points), with Loon right behind in 3rd (32 points).

📊 MATCH RESULTS & LEAGUE TABLE 📊
Scrandinavia are absolutely unstoppable right now, taking maximum points again, including a statement 8-1 victory over O.B City! 😱 Rapid Viennetta also secured a vital 5-0 win over Parmesan Belgrade to keep the pressure on.

In the standings, Scrandinavia have extended their lead at the top with 73 points. Bayern Bru sit in 2nd on 58 points, with O.B City currently 3rd on 45 points.

What a week! The momentum is building as we head further into the season. Keep up the graft, both on the pitch and in the kitchen! ✨

28/03/2026

WEEK 8 HIGHLIGHTS: THE HOME STRETCH BEGINS! ⏱️⚽
The pressure is reaching a boiling point as we move into the final weeks of Season 10! Week 8 delivered defining moments under the lights, with heavyweight clashes at the summit and vital battles for breathing room throughout the standings. 📈

🌟 WHAT TO WATCH FOR:

The Title Statement: A massive head-to-head at the top of the table has an impact on the title race. Will the gap become too big to close? ⚔️

Climbing the Standings: With the mid-table tighter than ever, see which squads managed to secure the points needed to create distance and shift the momentum in their favor.

Late Drama: From last-gasp equalizers to defensive heroics, the highlights capture the intensity of teams fighting for every inch as the season reaches its peak.

Clinical Finishing: Our strikers were on top form this week. Look out for a spectacular team goal featuring seamless one-touch passing that carved open the defense! 🍫⚽

The table is shifting, the goals are flying, and the drama is only just beginning. Catch all the action and the full Week 8 breakdown in the highlights now!

WATCH NOW: https://youtu.be/_U4SqPoHqGQ 📺

OFFICIAL SEASON 10 SPONSORS 🤝 A huge thank you to our partners helping us make this season the best yet:🏆 The Offshore Coach - Sponsor of the Team Weight L...

28/03/2026

JACK S HAS JUST BROKEN THE SOUND BARRIER! 🚀

Absolute scenes at Fat Fives week 7 as Jack S pulled off a worldie! 🏟️ A sensational first-time volley from just outside the box that left the keeper rooted and the crowd in shock. This is pure technique, explosive drama, and exactly why we love Monday nights! ⚽️💥

Want to see that thunderbolt for yourself and check out all the other action from the pitch? 🎥🍿

Catch our weekly highlights on our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/ to see every goal, every miss, and every epic save! Don’t forget to subscribe and turn on notifications so you’re the first to see the latest action. 🎥🍿

Was this the strike of the season so far, or have you seen a better one? Let us know in the comments! 👇

28/03/2026

Join us in celebrating a monumental milestone for Greg! 🌟⚖️

Greg has smashed the barrier to join the ELITE 10% Lost Club! 🏅 From that explosive 4kg loss in Week 1 to his incredible consistency since, he's proven that showing up is the secret sauce. ⚽️💨

Joining the 10% Club is a serious statement. From the 5% Club foundations into top-tier territory, Greg is a true inspiration to everyone on the weight loss journey! ⚡️

A massive congratulations from everyone at Fat Fives Football. You’re a credit to your team and a warrior on the scales! 🛡️🍫

Who’s going to be the next one to hit that 10% milestone? Let us know your goals in the comments! 👇

23/03/2026

WEEK 8: DOMINANCE AT BOTH ENDS! ⏱️⚽
The pressure is mounting as we head into the final weeks of Season 10! After a massive night on the scales and the turf, the gap at the top has widened, while the battle to climb the standings at the other end has produced some of the most vital results of the season so far.

🌟 TEAM OF THE WEEK 🌟

We have a shared captaincy this week! Both Doug and Jack S put in phenomenal shifts with a 2.8kg loss each. They are joined in an elite lineup by: Loon (2.0kg), Greg R (1.4kg), Stuart I (1.4kg), Adam Mc (1.4kg), Willie (1.2kg), Stephen B (1.1kg), Greg A (1.0kg), Terry A (1.0kg), and Ross C (0.7kg). 📈

🏆 THE OFFSHORE COACH: TEAM WEIGHT LOSS 🏆

The race for The Offshore Coach Team Weight Loss Award remains consistent at the summit! O.B City continue to lead the way on 78 points, while Scrandinavia (69) and Flaberdeen (64) are keeping the pressure on in 2nd and 3rd. ⚓

⚖️ LOSS LEADER ⚖️

Consistency is the name of the game! We still have a top 8 who have secured a perfect 21 points out of a possible 21 so far this season. Based on total percentage lost, Greg A holds the top spot, followed by Willie in 2nd and Lewis F in 3rd.

🎖️ INDIVIDUAL HONOURS & THE BOOT 👟

Player of the Season (POTS): The race for the individual crown is tightening up! James W maintains his lead at the top with 46 points, but there is now a three-way deadlock for 2nd place between Lewis F, Lewis P, and Zac, all sitting on 37 points. 🧤

The Chocolate Boot: Connor M has extended his lead at the top with 36 goals. The race for the silver boot is neck-and-neck, with Chris M and Loon currently tied in 2nd on 27 goals each. 🍫⚽

📊 LEAGUE STANDINGS & RESULTS 📊

It was a night of defining moments on the pitch! Scrandinavia made a massive statement in the title race, defeating their closest rivals and picking up a perfect 9 points to extend their lead at the top. Flaberdeen also secured 5 vital points to create some breathing room from the bottom of the table.

The standings now see Scrandinavia pulling ahead in 1st (64 points), with Bayern Bru in 2nd (51 points) and O.B City holding 3rd (39 points).

🤝 OUR SEASON 10 PARTNERS

A massive thank you to The Offshore Coach, our Team Weight Loss & General Sponsor. Their support ensures we don't have to rely on luck to make Fat Fives Football a success. Check them out here: https://link.fatfives.football/toc

🍔 McDonald's - Bib & General Sponsor. Supporting the Fat Fives community on and off the pitch. Check them out: https://link.fatfives.football/mcdonaldsabz

Football

21/03/2026

🚨 DO NOT SCROLL PAST THIS POST 🚨 Fat Fives Football NEEDS YOU 🫵
The Ask: Please Follow our page and Share this point, thank you! 🙏
If you are seeing this post, it means someone you know (a friend or even a family member) is on a journey to make positive change to their health. At Fat Fives Football we are determined to make 2026 the year our members hit their health goals. Despite all the amazing support we already have, each week we're still hearing the words "I didn't even know this was a thing".

SO LET'S CHANGE THAT!!

Each follow and each share YOU can provide helps raise awareness of how we can support Men with 26+ BMI in the North East of Scotland who are looking to make positive changes to their health. It takes only 10 SECONDS to hit the follow button on our page and the share button on this post but the impact it can make cannot be understated. Please just take 10 seconds of your time to support us through these actions.

If you are already a supporter, THANK YOU! Even if you don't participate in our sessions, your support is just as meaningful as a supporter of the amazing weight loss journeys our members are on.

Help us make 2026 the year our members hit their goals and change their lives for the better 💪💪