22/11/2025
Honouring Happy Self Care Week a personal note from me… 🦋Living with Neurodivergence ✨
Sharing this feels both frightening and liberating. When you declare yourself — especially when you speak about your struggles — thoughts run through your mind: What will people say? Will they understand? Will they see me differently, even warily? It can feel safer to stay silent, to keep these experiences hidden.
But silence doesn’t heal. And if we, as practitioners, teachers, or spiritual workers, cannot share our own insights and growing journeys, then how can we truly walk our path in authenticity? How can we inspire and encourage our students or community members to embrace their own journeys if we hide ours?
So here goes…
Words Are Energy: A Hidden Misalignment Revealed 🤔
This morning I woke with a dream that left me with a clear gift: words are energy. That phrase has been echoing in me, and I realise it connects directly to something I’ve struggled with for a long time — communication, and the way my words land with others.
As someone who is neurodivergent, I’ve always found “reading a room” difficult. My daughter has pointed this out, and she’s right. I’ve often felt nervous in my language, scared of getting it wrong, because in the past my words or responses have led to painful consequences — bullying, exclusion, isolation. To survive, I learned to stay on the outer rim of situations, not drawing attention to myself.
But now I’m beginning to see something I hadn’t recognised before. Perhaps there have been times when my words or actions didn’t land as I intended. Perhaps what I said was received differently than I imagined, and it hurt someone, even though I didn’t notice. What may have seemed blatant to the other person has sometimes gone completely over my head. This isn’t because I’m unkind — it’s because my neurodivergence means I don’t always pick up the signs, the subtle cues, the energy in the room.
The Silent Letters of Communication 🌱
When I think about my communication, I realise my struggles are often around the subtleties — the silent aspects in my own and others’ language. It feels a bit like the silent letters in our alphabet, the f’s, h’s, and g’s that are there but not spoken. These hidden signals in communication are huge, and I’m only now beginning to see how they affect me.
Looking at the common gaps neurodivergent people experience, I recognise myself in many of them:
🌱Missing subtle signs of discomfort or disinterest.
🌱Noticing changes in tone or body language but not knowing what they mean.
🌱Feeling ignored or excluded without understanding why.
🌱Overthinking interactions before and after, trying to figure out what I missed.
🌱Getting confused by certain types of humour that go over my head.
And yet, I know I have a big heart. I am empathetic and very sensitive to others’ energy. I often pick up on people’s emotions intuitively, but when my communication is misaligned — when the words or signals don’t match the energy I feel — I can become overwhelmed and unable to process anymore.
For empaths, receiving energy means absorbing everything. For me, that sensitivity combines with my neurodivergence, creating a double layer: I feel the energy deeply, but I may miss the silent cues that explain it. This is why communication can feel so confusing. It’s not that I don’t care — it’s that I care so much, and yet the subtleties slip past me, leaving me confused, frustrated, and overwhelmed.
A Note on Communication Glitches 💬
So if you’re chatting with someone and you feel a glitch in the communication — perhaps something is said, or one of those silent signals or interpretations feels misaligned — consider that it may not be intentional. That person may have a neurodivergent condition. Perhaps they are aware of it, perhaps they aren’t.
Many people live for years without a diagnosis, gradually unravelling and identifying their own quirks, irregularities, or symptoms. As a society, we are getting better at recognising these traits in children earlier, helping them understand what is happening and why — sparing them years of confusion and absence.
It’s also worth remembering that neurodivergence is not simply a “condition.” Neurodiversity describes the natural variation of all human brains. To one extent or another, we all share difficulties. For some, they are small and subtle, barely noticed in daily life. For others, they show up more clearly in communication, socialising, or performance. However it appears, these differences are part of the spectrum of human experience, even if they are not yet widely recognised or accepted.
Why This Matters ✨
By naming these silent letters of communication, I can begin to understand my condition more clearly. It helps me see that what others may find obvious has sometimes been hidden from me. It’s not a flaw in my character, but part of how my neurodivergent brain processes language and energy.
This awareness is painful. It has been a difficult awakening, because I now see how there may of been times my words may not have landed as I intended. Which makes me sad. This is why I am sharing this, for two reasons:
To help others who may identify with this. Perhaps you’ve felt confused, tormented internally, anxious, self‑critical, or alone. Know this: you are not alone. Neurodivergence impacts our lives in real, everyday ways, and recognising it can bring relief and understanding.
For greater awareness. I want to share not just my personal journey through the confusion of neurodivergence and running my own business, but also to help those who may not understand the complexities of the neurodivergent life. We are all constantly sharing and growing, and awareness helps us grow and build bridges.
And for my own healing, I say: Here Am I.
Practical Tips 🌿
For anyone reading this who identifies with my journey, here are some gentle practices that may help:
Pause before speaking. Take a breath, connect with your intention, and let your words carry clarity.
Ask clarifying questions. If you sense a shift in tone or body language, it’s okay to ask: “Did I say that as you intended to hear it?”
Prepare anchor phrases. Having a few sentences ready can reduce anxiety and help you feel grounded.
Ground your energy. Practices like Tai Chi, breathwork, or meditation can align your inner state with your outer words.
Seek feedback in safe spaces. Trusted friends or mentors can help you understand how your words land.
Forgive yourself. Misalignment is not failure — it’s part of the journey of learning and growing.
I find engaging with my overwhelmed self helpful. Hence my embodied energy practices: EFT and Tai Chi Movement for Well-being. They help me calm my energy. They help me to ground and release the overwhelm. Which can show up in our body, our minds and our energy systems. Mine shows as out of control energy, over thinking, thoughts and emotional overload.
Closing Reflection and Final Thoughts 🌟
My dream reminded me that words are energy. They carry vibration, intention, and spirit. For me, this awareness is both painful and liberating. Painful, because I see where misalignment has caused confusion or hurt. Liberating, because I now understand it’s not about being “wrong,” but about learning to align my words with the energy I want to share.
This is my journey. This is my awakening. And this is my offering — for myself, for others who walk a similar path, and for those who wish to understand us better.
Here Am I. 🙏🏼
At the end of the day, all we humans want is to be seen for who we truly are, accepted, and loved. If any of what I’ve shared resonates with you, please share your experiences — I would love to hear from you.
Research & Resources 📚
For readers who want to explore the science and guidance behind these reflections:
Cambridge University (2025): Study on social behaviours across neurodiverse young people, highlighting differences in social cognition and self‑regulation.
NHS Bedfordshire & Luton: Guidance on communication strategies for neurodivergent children and young people.
JIER Journal: Pedagogical study on neurodivergent non‑verbal communication techniques.
Verywell Mind (2023): Practical guide to social skills for neurodivergent people.
APA PsycNet (2020): Research on neurodiversity and cross‑cultural communication.
SpringerLink (2021): Language and Scientific Research — exploring how language shapes meaning and energy in science.
Seattle Pacific University (Physics Dept.): Paper on the role of language in teaching energy concepts.
ZHAW Zurich University of Applied Sciences (2020): Research on how language influences energy discourses.
