Phil Clubley Kinesiology

14/09/2025

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06/09/2025

We live in a culture where correction often feels like attack. Where feedback bruises the ego instead of shaping the person.

But if we can’t be corrected without being offended, we don’t grow — we just protect our pride at the expense of our progress.

That’s why this lesson matters so much for our children. And it starts with us.

When they watch us own our mistakes instead of deflecting… when they hear us say “you’re right, I could have done better there” instead of scrambling for excuses… when they see us receive guidance without bristling, they learn that correction isn’t humiliation — it’s refinement.

But discernment matters too. Not every opinion carries wisdom. Not every piece of advice deserves action. Growth doesn’t mean obeying every voice; it means learning to listen, to weigh, to consider — and then choosing wisely what to carry forward.

Correction given with care is not a threat — it’s a gift. And advice, even when it doesn’t fit, can sharpen our perspective if we’re willing to hear it without offence. That’s the skill worth passing on.

Because children who grow up seeing feedback as opportunity — not condemnation — will always have the freedom to keep evolving into more of who they’re meant to be. ❤️

Quote Credit: Unknown❣️

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03/09/2025

Being my kids primary carer when they were little was such a blessing. I learned so much from both of them and I’m so grateful for having them in my life. They are the most amazing young adults now and my heart burst with pride and love for them.

As a parent I didn’t always get it right. In fact the first few years were so hard. But I always took responsibility for myself and was able to apologise when my reaction was bigger than the situation called for and allowed them to express themselves in any way they needed to.

They have both, in turn, given me advice and wisdom when I’ve been struggling. They seem wise beyond their years. X

02/09/2025

I was working with a client this week who wasn’t happy with the way he responded in a family setting. When we don’t like the way we behave or respond in a situation (usually an interaction with another person or people) we may want to change how we deal with that situation. How we ARE in that situation.

We can definitely spend some time thinking about how we’d like to behave in those situations. But it will always be an act, and one that, in prolonged or stressful situations, will let us down.

We have to do the work on accepting who we are, and our responses, as those elements are part of who we are. They are real. Also, our past experiences, how we have felt and how we have responded in the past, also play a part. As we work through any trauma and learned responses our reactions to situations change BECAUSE WE CHANGE. We aren’t having to ‘pretend’ to be a certain way. If we are consciously behaving in a certain way we are acting. If it’s unconscious behaviour, and comes without thought, it is authentic.

Obviously there are situations where we may have to behave in a certain way, where we feel expected to meet a certain standard and this is ‘normal’ - social or workplace interactions, for instance. But being aware of how and why we behave that way, how much of ourselves we are sacrificing to be accepted will tell us something about ourselves. And the longer we are in these situations the more we may struggle to maintain a front.

But I think it’s important to accept who we are. ‘Losing control’ just means our authentic self, who we are by nature, or our response to a trigger, is inevitably going to rock up. By not being happy with any aspect of us that is, in fact, an authentic aspect of who we are, is to reject a core aspect of who we are. And even if we’d like to be different in certain situations we have to accept that. It’s who we are!

Disconnecting from a part of us, whether it’s a behaviour, a feeling/emotion or our physical body is stressful and we can’t heal a part of ourselves from which we are disconnected. When our physical body hurts we often blame the body, feel it’s letting us down and we see it as separate to us. Our body is our home and is working in the best way it can to support us - ALWAYS! As soon as we blame it, in the same way we blame our actions or our responses, is to separate ourselves from it. It makes it impossible to heal.

So, we should be grateful for how we respond to situations, how our body feels, because to become conscious of those aspects means we can heal and integrate aspects we have disowned or disconnected from and the more whole we will be.

I work from The injury Clinic in Anlaby, East Yorks, and online. Get in touch if you’d like to see what kinesiology can do for you.

01/09/2025

Shadow work is so incredibly valuable and Ben Calder - Integral Health is a master of embracing this misunderstood aspect of us.

It is as plain as the noses on our faces that right now there is a lot of vitriol being aimed at the "other"

Pick whatever "other" you would like to insert there, someone of a different race, gender, ideology, it makes no difference.

We continue to battle the things we haven't integrated and acknowledged in ourselves and we can always find someone else that is the blame for our suffering.

In shadow work, we can address these issues and help transform our view of the world, by changing what we really understand about ourselves.

If you would like to create more peace in the world, then find true peace in yourself.

My Embrace Your Shadow instant access course will assist this process and begin the healing of that which frightens most about the world.

https://integralhealth.mylearnworlds.com/course/shadow-self

29/08/2025

Parker and his girlfriend, Gabby, have been desperate for a day out to visit and we’ve made it this afternoon. I’ve let left them to go and explore on their own and my energy system is thanking me for some time on my own, amongst rocks, trees and water flowing through the valley (and there are a few people but that’s ok!).

I saw this poem from .mikefields a few days ago and it’s resonated beautifully with where I am at the moment.

25/08/2025

Today was a perfect day to regulate, chill, spend time with myself, my thoughts and feelings - by the Humber, being near water… Then with my youngest son (amazingly wise and who never ceases to amaze me with his self responsibility, self awareness and insights) in woods, talking, connecting, making space for each other on the other side of the Humber!