Lisa Visram Therapy

02/03/2026

Thinking of all those who are finding out their secondary school placements today.

27/02/2026

Emotions can be tough to navigate, and often for us parents some of them can be tough to accept in our children or ourselves. However, all emotions are needed, and they all need space to be felt and seen, if they are pushed down it can be harder for us to identify or accept them later in life. Sometimes, the emotions that we don’t allow ourselves to feel can make themselves felt in other ways, manifesting into physical symptoms.

Noticing and naming our emotions when we feel them is the first step towards emotional awareness, practicing this with your children can help them to also notice and name their own feelings.

As a parent naming how you are feeling can also relieve anxiety in your child, they will know if you are in a bad mood or upset, and if it is not named they can often assume they are the cause, naming it, saying “oh I’m feeling grumpy today, I didn’t get enough sleep” not only models emotional awareness and acceptance to your child, but allows them to know that they are not the cause of your grumpiness.

20/02/2026

It can be hard knowing what to do as a parent, sometimes we want our children to like us, to be their friend in the hopes that they will turn to us if they have a problem. However, this can lead to us not setting consistent boundaries, which can then lead to our children not feeling safe or unsure where they stand, it can be confusing for them.
As parents we are always learning, learning how to best deal with new situations, new experiences and along side this, our children are also learning, this can at times become messy, we will get things wrong, as will our children, and that is ok. When we are able to accept this, it can help to relieve some of the pressure, we may put on ourselves and our children. That pressure to always get it right, to always know what to do, to always be well behaved and to have all the answers. Sometimes knowing that these expectations are myths, are not real, helps us to let go of them a little and to give ourselves some compassion, we are doing the best we can, and that’s all we can do, it is enough.
You as a parent are doing the best you can, and that is enough!

13/02/2026

13/02/2026

This week has been Children's mental health week, the theme has been "my space", with a focus on helping children to feel they belong. Feeling a sense of belonging has such an impact on children and adolescence, it helps them feel safe, connected, and accepted as themselves.
One way we as parents can help our children feel that they belong is to give them TIME, our time, time to grow at their own pace, our attention, time to be themselves, to choose what they do in that time with us observing and joining in, so they can see that we value and accept them.
Resources from Place2Be and Anna Freud

11/02/2026

10/02/2026

A great fun poster from Place2be to support and promote children's mental health week, with the theme of belonging.

09/02/2026

This week is Children's Mental Health week, the theme is "this is my place", focussing on belonging, and the importance of a safe inclusive place where children feel that they are heard, welcomed and belong. have free resources and activity ideas available on their website.

06/02/2026

Friendships can be tricky to navigate, and heartbreaking as a parent to hear when things are not going well. It can be hard to resist the urge to avenge your child, to “fix” the problem, or to continually ask how things are going if a particular friendship is causing problems.
It can be hard for a child to understand the intricacies of friendship, and often hard for them to see things from others’ perspectives.
If your child or teen is struggling with friendships, here are a few things that you could try that may support them through this time.
1. Show empathy, let them know that friendships can be hard, its not just them. It can be easy for a child to assume that they are doing it wrong.
2. If there is a particular incident, after validating their feelings, talk about how the other child might have been feeling or thinking.
3. Talk to them about what makes a good friend, this is important both when they are choosing a friend and when they are being a friend.
4. Help them to set boundaries, discuss with them what is important to them, and how to say no or stop when things are getting too rough, or the “banter” and “roasting” becomes hurtful.
5. Help them to recognise the “stop” signals in others, so that they know when they have crossed a boundary.
6. Normalise friendship disagreements, discuss how not everyone can agree all the time and that’s what makes good friends, if we all liked and thought the same the world would be boring, but it’s important to respect other people views.
Sometimes friendship problems need more support, in this instance speaking to the school may help, however if it is affecting them emotionally for a long period of time then more professional support maybe helpful.
Childline and Young minds are both great sources for further information.
https://www.youngminds.org.uk/young-person/coping-with-life/friends/
https://www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/friends-relationships-sex/friends/friendship-problems/

30/01/2026

Some people may find some of the content of this post upsetting, please be kind to yourself, reach out and talk to someone if you need to.
Let’s talk about SHAME.
Shame can be powerful, it can keep us quiet, make us feel alone, scared, unloved. Shame has us believe that we are a bad person, that we are the problem.
Shame is an internal voice of humiliation telling us, “you are bad”, “you are unlovable”, “I hate you”, it reinforces the negative and abusive messages we may have received. Shame can also show up physically in the body as aches, pains and sickness.
Shame can make us doubt what we know, question our decisions and distrust our sense of right and wrong, it can make us feel small and feel the need to constantly apologise to others for simply being.
In children and adolescents, in the moment, to protect themselves against shame, it may be disguised in the form of denial (lying – “I didn’t do it”), blame (“they made me do it”), Minimise (“it’s only broken a little bit”) and rage (shouting, anger “you always blame me”).
So how could we respond?
DON'T Keep asking it they did something.
DON'T become angry.
DON'T tell them they are bad.
DO Make connection before correction.
DO implement meaningful consequences.
DO express unconditional love.
DO model self-compassion.
Shame thrives in the silence, speak out, talk about it, write about it, stop the cycle of shame.

23/01/2026

Emotions can be big and hard to navigate, as parents we may find some emotions our children display easier to embrace than others. Some emotions are seen as negative and it can be very easy to try and move your child quickly through them to return to more positive states. However I believe it's important to acknowledge and think about the importance of these negative emotions, to use them as a time for connection, to navigate together, to sit with them rather than rush through them.
Here are some tips and ideas that may help with those trickier emotions.
What emotions does your child display that you find hard to sit with? Leave a comment of emotions that you would like more ideas and tips of.

15/01/2026

It can be so hard to find the right words to explain things to children, to help them to understand things differently and see things from a different perspective. I find books can sometimes help, throughout my career there have been two that really stand out for me. These two books made me, as an adult, stop and think, to have that "oh yeh" moment where it makes a bit more sense.
THE RABBIT LISTENED, captures and explains empathy and the power of sitting alongside someone.
THE HUGE BAG OF WORRIES, illustrates how worries can build up and become overwhelming, and how talking about them can help.