Nicola Gilbert Counselling and Psychotherapy

16/04/2026

There’s been lots of talk in the last 24 hours about the Renewed Women’s Health Strategy for England https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/69df5d7261d2e8e9b9e42d2e/renewed-womens-health-strategy-for-england-web-accessible.pdf.

I feel like I should be excited but I just don’t feel it. So why is that?

Well, firstly it’s a renewed strategy. A lot of what’s in there has already been stated but little has changed.

Secondly, where’s the money? Enough to make systemic changes is suspiciously absent.

But mostly, third, the shifts needed to make a difference to women are deeply cultural and any focus on systemic cultural change is entirely absent from this strategy.

Speaking as a woman who experienced the worst of our NHS in 2023 I don’t think I want much, honestly. I could write a list of what I’d want to be different in terms of referrals, tests, and treatment but really what it comes down to is I want to be heard and believed.

Being heard and believed matters and that’s a cultural problem, not a referral problem.

Please hear us this time.

If you recognise yourself here, you are someone I work with in my psychotherapy practice. I have lived it and I know you have too.

Get in touch on nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com

10/04/2026

It’s been a while since I last posted. Since then I
🏝️went on holiday
🤧got sick
🙇‍♀️have been trying to write a long and challenging essay for my Masters
💼went back to the day job
💚been seeing psychotherapy clients and
👩‍💻have continued to build my private psychotherapy practice including marketing, website text, blogs, Google Business Profile etc etc.

Yes all at the same time 😓which is why I got behind on my posts. But it all got me thinking, I don’t think I’m in any way special for doing a lot but what is it that drives the need to do so much? And what can we do to help ourselves when we’re truly in the thick of it?

For me going out with my camera is a real salve. I walk, focus on the photo I want to take and my mind moves away from all the stress. My colleagues know I’ve been taking lots of photos so that probably says something 😂

Here’s one from this week.

What do you do to help yourself?

If you recognise yourself here and want to explore what it means for you, contact me on nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com

13/03/2026

Have you heard of the 7 types of rest?

We tend to think of rest as sleep or maybe a duvet day but there’s:
Physical
Mental
Sensory
Creative
Emotional
Social
Spiritual

If you had a good night’s sleep but still feel exhausted, it could be that you need a different kind of rest.

Calm have a great article on it if you’d like to check it out https://www.calm.com/blog/7-types-of-rest

I’m hoping to get all of these kinds of rest as I take a holiday next week 😎

Did you know there are 7 different types of rest that can help you feel renewed? Learn how to incorporate them into your life to help beat burnout.

06/03/2026

Hi 👋 I’m Nicola. I offer therapeutic support in Tooting Bec and online. I work with people who have experienced:

Depression
Anxiety
Panic
Domestic Abuse
Sexual Assault
Bereavement

I have a particular interest in working with people who are trying to get or have a diagnosis of endometriosis or similar and the significant mental impact of this (particularly pertinent in Endometriosis Awareness Month 🎗️).

I’m a trainee psychotherapist under the UKCP with 17 years experience in wellbeing roles and 2.5 working with psychotherapy clients and love what I do 💚

I have immediate availability so get in touch on nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com

06/03/2026

March is endometriosis awareness month. A worldwide annual opportunity to raise awareness around endometriosis, the impact of its symptoms, the need for research, and the need for treatment options or, dare I say it, a cure.

Endometriosis UK’s most recent report highlights significant issues that endometriosis sufferers (diagnosed and not) are very aware of and live with the consequences of every day. These include
Diagnosis time has increased to 9 years 4 months
If you’re from an ethnically diverse community diagnosis takes 11 years
83% of those seeking help by a medical professional were dismissed by them (up 13% in 2 years)
The cost to the UK economy of menstrual health conditions including endometriosis is £11 billion!
https://www.endometriosis-uk.org/sites/default/files/2026-02/Endometriosis%20-%20The%20State%20of%20Endometriosis%20Care%20Report.pdf

I mean seriously, it makes sense for something to be done about it, right?!

If you’re in pain, hoping for a diagnosis, living the trauma of a medical system designed to gaslight and ignore you, you’re not alone.

I work with clients whose mental health has been put under strain not just by the disease but by the system that should be taking care of them.

Get in touch on nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com

27/02/2026

For anyone with either a diagnosis or suspected diagnosis of endometriosis, it getting some attention this week at the BAFTAs matters.

With an average time of 10 years to get a diagnosis, utter exhaustion from coping with the condition itself, the compounding impact of a medical system that more often than not doesn’t believe you, a lack of research about what causes endometriosis, and no real treatments to stop it growing or regrowing after surgery, this level of visibility matters.

I have worked with many people who have, or suspect they have, endometriosis and the impact of them having to cope every day is immensely challenging.

It’s hard when you’ve been gaslit, told to “take a paracetamol”, “it’s just a bad period”, “it’s not that bad”, “take an antidepressant”, “it’s just stress”. No it’s not! And yes I’ve had all these and more said to me too. You deserve to be heard and your pain taken seriously.

If you’d like to work with someone who will hear you, believe you, and see your pain get in touch on nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPloEp8BAz8


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYhDy82mHTA

20/02/2026

Uff I feel this and add

A cup of body aches.

3 spoons of things happening that no doctor seems able to explain despite many tests (sigh).

Layer upon layer of exhaustion from the gaslighting (it’s all in your head, no it’s not!)

Sachets of pills that don’t make any difference.

If you’re managing a health condition that requires day-to-day management, I get it.

I work with clients who might approach me for one issue and during our time together they recognise that they need support with the impact of their physical wellbeing.

I have experience working with the mental impact of many physical health conditions and have a particular interest in women’s health and the fight people experience to get heard in the healthcare system.

If you’re interested in starting sessions get in touch on nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com

You’ll be seen and heard here.

13/02/2026

So many people have had this said to them by friends, family, and, yes, sadly by their therapist. “You attract drama”, “you brought it on yourself”, “you’re the problem”, “you’re the common denominator”. It’s no wonder it seeps into people’s brains.

Firstly, you didn’t bring this on yourself, other people’s behaviour is not yours to solve, and you’re only the common denominator because you’re the one talking about your relationships.

At the same time it can be really helpful to see if there is a pattern for you, and, if so, where it comes from. What I’ve found is that people can be people pleasers, for some people something happened when they were a child which means they respond in particular ways in relationships. Perhaps they were bullied, or have been in an abusive relationship. There are so many possible reasons but things can change. There is hope for things to be different.

I work with people who see themselves reflected in comments like this, who feel the pain of them and want something different for themselves. We’ll work through the pain, identify the patterns, and talk about how you want your life to be so you can get there.

To get in touch to discuss working together email me on nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com

05/02/2026

I want to take a moment to talk about the four women in this documentary https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m002qx68/lover-liar-predator

Four strong, brilliant women who were abused, coercively controlled and denied justice before finally getting their abuser sent to prison.

This is a hard hitting documentary told in the women’s own words. No-one speaks for them anymore.

I was left thinking though, I wonder how many people watching this think it’s an extraordinary and unusual story. It’s not. I know many people whose story is markedly similar, except the ending. Most get no justice through the criminal justice system and many don’t find other people abused by the same person to talk with. Two things these women worked really hard to get.

If you recognised yourself in their stories, please know you’re not alone. And please know there is hope. You may not feel there is now. In fact you might be thinking ‘how on earth do I get through this moment I’m in’. But you can.

There are many organisations who can help. See my post here https://www.linkedin.com/posts/activity-7411418144168296448-sK0o?utm_source=share&utm_medium=member_ios&rcm=ACoAABKeplEBcMzXMZVCsQbUhdysz83wDb3dsAU.

And if you want someone to talk with and support you through I’m here nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com
I have immediate availability online across the UK and in person in South London. Prices range from £45-£65 per session.

You don’t have to do this alone. Just like these women.

Domestic abuse doesn't wait for the festive period to be over. It's in the fear of the person coming home drunk and taking it out on you or the children. It's in the comments that feel just a bit off that make you uneasy (was it gaslighting or is it just in my head?!) It's in you waiting for somethi...

01/02/2026

Are you looking for therapeutic support?

I’m Nicola, a trainee psychotherapist with four years of training behind me. I’m based in Tooting Bec and online and focus primarily on sexual assault and domestic abuse though I also have experience in a wide range of issues including anxiety, depression, bereavement, and trauma.

Fees range from £45-£65 with immediate availability.

Get in touch on nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com

23/01/2026

Over-explaining comes up a lot in therapy and it makes sense why.

For some clients they were never really heard as a child and feel desperately the need to be heard now.

For others they were gaslit by a partner and told their reality wasn’t reality at all. They now find themselves clinging on to their truth with everything they have.

Many blame themselves and feel there’s something wrong with them but, really, they’ve done their absolute best to adapt to their circumstances.

It can feel really uncomfortable to be seen, heard and understood in your truth by a psychotherapist. But it can also be a powerful new experience.

To get in touch and possibly start sessions email nicolagilbertpsychotherapy@outlook.com

16/01/2026

At this point in January when we’re all wondering ‘will this month never end?’ I thought I’d re-introduce myself. I’m Nicola, a trainee psychotherapist and counsellor working with clients face to face in Tooting Bec/Balham and online.

For the last 2.5 years I’ve volunteered as a psychotherapist in a women’s centre and an online low cost psychotherapy service. I’ve worked with people who experienced sexual assault, survived domestic abuse, have a new or evolving health diagnosis, experienced a bereavement, or have recognised that there are aspects of their childhood that they’d like to talk about with someone.

I strongly believe that psychotherapy can help you find the you that you want to be and get you to a future you want to be living. There is hope, and we can find it together.

If you’re feeling nervous about getting in touch and starting therapy, that’s natural as it can feel like a big step. When you contact me we’ll arrange a 15-20 minute free consultation which is usually a phone call or online meeting. During this we’ll talk a little and you can ask me any questions you have. I believe it’s really important that you choose a psychotherapist that you feel you can talk with, so openly exploring this can be helpful.

If you’ve been thinking about psychotherapy, you’re welcome to get in touch and we’ll take it one step at a time nicolagilbertpsychotherspy@outlook.com

(Photo of me in one of the rooms where I work).